This has made the e-mails rounds several times over, so it’s probably old to many. But I thought these were funny even after several readings, and appropriate for Mother’s Day coming up. There are just a few more than thirteen, but I’ll let you have those free. 🙂 The lovely Thursday Thirteen banner above was made by Yellow Rose.
ADULTS: Group of people Mom longs to communicate with after several hours of talking in small words about topics like “who touched who first”
BATHROOM: A room used by the entire family, believed by all except Mom to be self-cleaning.
BECAUSE: Mom’s reason for having kids do things which can’t be explained logically.
CHINA: Legendary nation reportedly populated by starving children who love leftover vegetables.
DATE: Infrequent outings with Dad where Mom can enjoy worrying about the kids in a different setting.
FEEDBACK: The inevitable result when the baby doesn’t appreciate the strained carrots.
LOOK OUT!: What it’s too late for your child to do by the time you scream it.
PUDDLE: A small body of water that draws other small bodies wearing dry shoes into it.
STERILIZE: What you do to your first baby’s pacifier by boiling it and to your last baby’s pacifier by blowing on it.
SUNDAY BEST: Attractive, expensive children’s clothing made of a fabric which attracts melted chocolate and grape juice.
TEMPER TANTRUMS: What you should keep to a minimum so as to not upset the children.
TOP BUNK: Where you should never put a child wearing Superman jammies.
“WHEN YOUR FATHER GETS HOME”: Standard measurement of time between crime and punishment.
WHOOPS: An exclamation that translates roughly to “Get a sponge.”
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