Some weeks ago Heather at Graced By Christ began a series called “What Is the Shape of You Faith?” I participated in the first installment regarding testimony, but haven’t yet in the subsequent ones about Personality, Abilities, Passion, and today’s about Life Experiences. The questions have been a bit more involved than I have had (or maybe made) time to deal with thoroughly, but they have been providing food for thought! I think I am finally ready to deal with the section on personality.

Before I do, though, I want to discuss a couple of inherent dangers in this type of study. Sometimes, when studying or discussing various personality types (or spiritual temperaments), people tend to pigeonhole others based on what they think everyone else’s personality type is and then listen to and react toward them through that filter. While this kind of study can help us understand and interact with others, we have to be careful about pigeonholing and over-simplifying.

One of the other major dangers in studying personality types is the tendency to then use our personalities as an excuse: what comes across to others as a flaw we excuse in ourselves with a “That’s just the way I am” mentality. A former pastor used to say, “With every strength there is an off-setting weakness.” Because we have a fallen nature, our personality traits can have their negative sides. We are all, as Christians, supposed to be continually conforming to Christ’s image. A study of personality can help us understand ourselves and how we relate to others, and we can rejoice in the way God has made us, but that shouldn’t be the end of it: we should be asking the Lord to help smooth the rough edges, to help us see the weakness as well as the strength of our traits so that we can best glorify Him and be used by Him and seek His help and strength to grow and act and react as He wants us to rather than as what comes naturally. For instance, someone who is naturally introverted can understand that that probably means she may not be likely to have a job or ministry that involves dealing with a multitude of people. But she shouldn’t let that introverted tendency cause her to not reach out to others, to not extend herself, to stay within her own four walls (I am introverted, and I know these are my tendencies). By God’s grace, she can reach out. Conversely, some personality types can run roughshod over people and have trouble seeing things any other way but the way they see them, or someone who is very direct and straightforward can come across as lacking in grace and be totally unaware that he or she is coming across that way. With these or any other traits, we can know what our tendencies are and see ways the Lord can use them, but we need to also see those traits are not an end in themselves and ask the Lord to refine us and conform us to His likeness. Any way in which we’re not conformed to His likeness can be a stumblingblock to other people.

On the positive side, years ago my pastor at the time was telling about how some of the different prophets in the Bible were contemporaries of each other. Some of them lived and prophesied around the same time and in the same places, or very close, and had similar messages. One reason for that, he said, was that each one had a different personality or style and could be used by God to reach different people. Some folks would be drawn to the one prophet; some to another. That was eye-opening for me, not just in understanding the Biblical prophets, but in understanding one of the reasons God made different personalities and how He could use them.

One other positive note about studying different personalities is the realization that all the different personality types are needed to balance each other out and accomplish different things.

Now….as to my own personality…I tend to get frustrated with these tests. I tend to be too analytical and often, as I am looking over the choices to answers to specific questions, think that none of them are exactly what my answer would be. 🙂 And the personality tests that result in all the initials have frustrated me because I haven’t quite understood the results, and the explanation of the results went on for pages and pages and only confused me more. But the test Heather recommended had links to explanations of the test results that were fairly easy to digest. I have taken these kinds of tests before and may have come up with some different initials (I thought I had kept the previous results somewhere, but couldn’t find them to compare my current results). But my results for this test were ISTJ: Introverted, Sensing. Thinking, Judging, the one called the Inspector, or in another place, the Guardian, the Duty Fulfiller. As I read through the description, I recognized myself in a lot of it, but disagreed with some of it. I saw and took another personality test on another site, and the result there was ISFJ; Introverted, Sensing, Feeling, Judging, the Nurturer, the Protector Guardian. So the difference seems to be between the thinking and feeling areas. That may be due to those questions on the test where my answer wasn’t clear-cut one way or the other, or, as Heather pointed out in her post, the result of Christ working in me to balance me over the years.

Heather asks:

So now we have our basic temperaments figured out how do we apply them to our faith?

How does your specific personality affect how you relate to those around you?

How does it affect how you relate to other Christians?

Non-Christians?

How does it affect your ministry?

Did you recognize anyone else’s personality when looking over the types?

How might this affect how you relate to them?

How does you personality affect your relationship to the Lord?

This post is already long, so I won’t go through a step-by step analysis: instead I’ll just mention a few things.

I do tend to be more practical than emotional, though I am not unemotional, and there are times in my life I have to fight being ruled by emotion. I agree that I am not effusive and probably can be seen sometimes as aloof. One set of college roommates once told me well into the school year that when they first met me, they thought I was a stuck-up rich kid. 😦 I knew I wasn’t rich and hoped I wasn’t stuck-up! I guess the fact that they felt free to tell me that indicated that they decided I wasn’t after all. That did grieve me, though, that I came across like that, but I often hear that charge being laid against others who are quiet and shy.

My pastor once said that some people are idea people and some people are – I forget what exact word he used, but the type of practical person who works out the ideas. I’m the latter. As such I can get very frustrated with the enthusiastic dreamers and the idea people, when they come up with something that either just won’t work or would be a pain to work out. It’s especially hard when the “dreamer” is the authority over the “doer” – the dreamer/authority comes up with the shadowy but enthusiastic idea which causes the doer to think, “What…?” “Do you have any idea what that would take?” One can feel dumped on in such situations or feel that the dreamer seems to be impractical or just dreaming and not caring about what he is requiring the doer to do, or that the dreamer is just dreaming while the doer has to do all the work. It’s hard to be patient and longsuffering – they probably think it is hard to be patient and longsuffering with the person like me who they might think is a “stick in the mud” or who “doesn’t like to try new things” (not entirely true) or who seems to keep shooting down their great and wonderful ideas. 🙂 It’s just one of those areas where we need to maintain balance, to realize that the world needs both dreamers and doers, and to try to be gracious with each other and find common ground.

One of the differences between the ISTJ and the ISFJ was that the “ISTJs are easily frustrated by the inconsistencies of others, especially when the second parties don’t keep their commitments. But they usually keep their feelings to themselves unless they are asked. And when asked, they don’t mince words. Truth wins out over tact.” I agree with the frustration part, but I don’t usually express myself by not mincing words. I don’t usually express myself at all when it comes to frustrations with others – at least not to that person. My poor dear husband hears a lot of my frustrations with others. I do see a tremendous need for tact, and though I am sure I fail sometimes, I usually try not to directly say, “You should do….” But rather, “You might try…” or “Well, this worked for me…” I think in this I am more like the ISFJ than the ISTJ.

“The grim determination of the ISTJ vindicates itself in officiation of sports events, judiciary functions, or another situation which requires making tough calls and sticking to them.” Grim determination? 🙂 I can’t see myself in any of those occupations – I am too indecisive, too prone to look at all the possible angles.

Words like faithful, dependable, hard-working come up on both profiles. I want to be and try to be – I am acutely aware that I fail in those areas. What progress has been made has mainly been due to growth in Christian character over the years.

“The ISTJ will work for long periods of time and put tremendous amounts of energy into doing any task which they see as important to fulfilling a goal. However, they will resist putting energy into things which don’t make sense to them, or for which they can’t see a practical application. They prefer to work alone, but work well in teams when the situation demands it…The ISTJ has little use for theory or abstract thinking, unless the practical application is clear.” Yep.

“Under stress, ISTJs may fall into ‘catastrophe mode’, where they see nothing but all of the possibilities of what could go wrong. They will berate themselves for things which they should have done differently, or duties which they failed to perform. They will lose their ability to see things calmly and reasonably, and will depress themselves with their visions of doom.” I can be like that – I think I’ve mellowed in this area over the years.

“ISFJs are often unappreciated, at work, home, and play. Ironically, because they prove over and over that they can be relied on for their loyalty and unstinting, high-quality work, those around them often take them for granted–even take advantage of them. Admittedly, the problem is sometimes aggravated by the ISFJs themselves; for instance, they are notoriously bad at delegating (‘If you want it done right, do it yourself’). And although they’re hurt by being treated like doormats, they are often unwilling to toot their own horns about their accomplishments because they feel that although they deserve more credit than they’re getting, it’s somehow wrong to want any sort of reward for doing work (which is supposed to be a virtue in itself). (And as low-profile Is, their actions don’t call attention to themselves as with charismatic Es.) Because of all of this, ISFJs are often overworked, and as a result may suffer from psychosomatic illnesses.” Boy, does that paragraph hit the nail on the head!! Especially the last two or three sentences. I don’t really think I am unappreciated, but I can feel that way when I’m overworked and stressed.

“Like most Is, ISFJs have a few, close friends. They are extremely loyal to these, and are ready to provide emotional and practical support at a moment’s notice. (However, like most Fs they hate confrontation; if you get into a fight, don’t expect them to jump in after you. You can count on them, however, run and get the nearest authority figure.)” Yep!

“One ISFJ trait that is easily misunderstood by those who haven’t known them long is that they are often unable to either hide or articulate any distress they may be feeling. For instance, an ISFJ child may be reproved for ‘sulking,’ the actual cause of which is a combination of physical illness plus misguided “good manners.” An adult ISFJ may drive a (later ashamed) friend or SO into a fit of temper over the ISFJ’s unexplained moodiness, only afterwards to explain about a death in the family they ‘didn’t want to burden anyone with.'” This was one of those paragraphs that was very helpful to me – I recognized myself perfectly but couldn’t have told you beforehand that that was what was going on – trying to balance that something is wrong that I can’t hide but can’t articulate either.

The “I” for Introverted is one thing that has remained constant in any personality test. Introversion and shyness aren’t exactly the same things, but they do go together, I think. I was painfully shy growing up. After I became a Christian, because I tended to be pretty quiet in groups, people would comment on my “meek and quiet spirit.” I can testify that a closed mouth does not necessarily indicate a quiet spirit. One can have a raging spirit and still be quiet on the outside (which is not very healthy, by the way!) I usually let other people initiate conversations and friendships (because I usually didn’t know what to do or say or was too timid), usually had one close friend rather than a multitude of friends, was a homebody rather than a person who constantly had to be out doing things with other people. The Lord has helped me with these tendencies a lot through the years. One thing He did was to allow me to go to a small Christian school my last two years of high school, and I got involved in things there, like yearbook and student council, that I never would have dreamed of trying in the larger public high school I had been in, plus being in a smaller school, there is less opportunity to “hide” in the crowd. Then He allowed me to go to a Christian university and be in a dorm room with four other girls at a time. That forces one to interact with other people and come out of oneself a bit. Then He led me to a man to marry who is very easy-going and had no problems talking with or interacting with people. Plus all along the way He helped me to grow in Him and see the need to get beyond myself and reach out to and interact with others. After I was married and began to get involved in my local church, one of the first “jobs” I was asked to do was to go to the visitors at our ladies’ group, speak to them, introduce myself, and ask them to fill out a visitor’s card. That doesn’t sound too hard, does it? Well, it was a big step for me, and many times I would have to find a quiet spot, take a deep breath, and then go on. People who know me now probably would have trouble believing I was ever so shy, but I was. Nowadays I can start a conversation with other people fairly easily (especially if I don’t think about it too much beforehand), but it is still my tendency not to, to let someone else greet a visitor or take the first step. I’m still a homebody and can get very frustrated and depleted when there are a lot of activities going on that take us away from home. With the connection to the “outside world” with the Internet now, it would be all too easy for me to keep within my own four walls, yet thankfully the Lord has shown me the importance over the years of reaching out and interacting with others.

As far as ministry goes, for most of my life I have preferred to be the quiet one behind the scenes doing whatever needed to be done. You wouldn’t think an introverted person would be a leader. Yet God has put me in some positions that I knew I had to take or else be out of His will. I have seen Him stretch me in ways I never would have thought possible. I still feel awkward about the “in front of people” part of those ministries, but He helps me with that.

I don’t know that this post is very coherent: I’ve been thinking about it for weeks and composing it in spurts over days while reading the various profiles and having all of that swirling around in my head. J In some ways it might be better to let this sit for a while and then come back to it and refine it, as far as the writing goes. But since this is already so far behind the other posts on this subject, I want to go ahead and get it out there.

ISFJ Profile

ISTJ Profile