Category Archives: Christian Life

Birthday Meditations on Aging

Posted on by
Birthday meditations on aging

Since my birthday is this week, and I had a “milestone” birthday last year, I’ve been thinking about aging.

My husband and I often remark that we don’t feel “old” (“old,” to me, has always been about twenty years beyond where I am now). We might tire a little more easily and have a plethora of aches and pains. But looking closely in the mirror often yields unpleasant surprises. When did that happen?

Seeing my mother-in-law through her last ten years of life brought up a long list of concerns about what we’ll face as we age. I once heard a preacher say that one reason our bodies start to fail us as we get older is so that we’ll be more willing to let loose of them. Each year reminds us that we’re in a temporary habitation.

But probably what most concerns me about aging is not being taken seriously any more, being thought of as out of touch or irrelevant.

On the other hand, there are perks to getting older. I’m more settled in my own skin. I’ve wrestled through questions and problems. Hopefully I’ve gained some wisdom through the years.

I wish Elisabeth Elliot had written a book on aging. She was my mentor-from-afar since my college days and helped me prepare for womanhood, marriage, motherhood, and Christian life and service. I did just discover that she had a series about aging on her radio program. I might spend my birthday week listening to those.

But I found in my files of her old e-mail devotionals an excerpt from her book On Asking God Why titled “Happy Birthday—You’re Heading Home.” She writes what she would say to an old friend on her birthday. The last few paragraphs encourage me:

You’ve heard those bad news/good news jokes. Well, this isn’t cheap birthday card humor. The bad news is that another year has gone by and we haven’t done all we meant to do and it’s not going to come back to give us another chance. The good news is the Gospel. We can be reconciled to God–sins forgiven, fears taken care of. That old cross, the emblem of suffering and shame, stands between us and our sins and fears, our past and future, and on its outstretched arms we see Love. The Love that would die for us is the Love that lives for us–Jesus Christ, Lord, Master, Savior of the World, wanting to give you (for your birthday if you’ll take it) something that will really quench your thirst, rivers among the sand dunes and wells in the valley; wanting to hold your hand, help you, give you–not only a happy birthday, but everlasting joy.

I’m not the least bit bashful about telling my age. I’m glad for every birthday that comes, because it is the Lord, my faithful Guide, who “summoned the generations from the beginning.” I look in the mirror and see the increasingly (and creasingly) visible proofs of the number of years, but I’m reconciled. Christ reconciles me to God and to God’s wonderful plan. My life is his life. My years are his years. To me life is Christ, and death is nothing but gain. When I remember that, I really can’t think of a thing I ought to be afraid of. I can’t be sorry I’m a year older and nearer to absolute bliss.

I pray for you on your birthday, that your path, as is promised to the just man, will shine not less and less but more and more; that you will still bring forth fruit in old age; that the Lord will give you a thankful heart like the psalmist’s who sang,

O God, thou hast taught me from boyhood,
all my life I have proclaimed thy marvellous works:
and now that I am old and my hairs are gray,
forsake me not, O God….
Songs of joy shall be on my lips;
I will sing thee psalms, because thou has redeemed me.
All day long my tongue shall tell of thy righteousness.

(Psalms 71:17, 18, 23, 24 NEB)

So–happy birthday! If you have friends and parties and presents, be thankful for such bonuses. If you have no friends with you today, no party, not a package to open, you still have a long list of things to thank God for, things that matter much more. A birthday filled with thanksgiving and hope is the happiest kind of birthday. Have one of those! Deck yourself with joy!

I agree with Elisabeth and Paul that “to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain” (Philippians 1:21) and that heaven will be bliss. But I am encouraged that many through Scripture pleaded for more years of this life in which to serve and praise the Lord.

Elisabeth quoted the first part of Psalm 71:18. The whole verse, along with 17, stood out to me as I read it recently:

So even to old age and gray hairs,
    O God, do not forsake me,
until I proclaim your might to another generation,
    your power to all those to come.

That’s what I want to do with as many days as God gives me.

(I often link up with some of these bloggers.)

When Do You Need to Look to Jesus?

Posted on by
Look away to Jesus

I don’t remember what I came to talk about with my elderly pastor’s wife that day four decades ago. Probably some besetting sin, some struggle of faith, some kind of burden. But I remember her shining, earnest face as she repeated, “Look away to Jesus.”

When do you need to look to Jesus?

Do you know where you’re going when you die? Do you have inner peace? Are you burdened with the weight of the world’s problems, and with your own as well? Do you have regrets, guilt, shame? Look to Jesus.

Look to Me, and be saved, All you ends of the earth! For I am God, and there is no other (Isaiah 45:22, NKJV).

Jesus said to him, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me” (John 14:6).

Do you need to change? Are you discouraged because of a lack of transformation and growth? Look to Jesus.

And we all, with unveiled face, beholding the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from one degree of glory to another. For this comes from the Lord who is the Spirit (2 Corinthians 3:18).

Do you need focus as you run the race of life? Do you stumble and fall spiritually? Look to Jesus.

Let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God (Hebrews 12:1b-2).

Do you long for something more than this life has to offer? Do you need hope to persevere? Look to Jesus.

For the grace of God that brings salvation has appeared to all men, teaching us that, denying ungodliness and worldly lusts, we should live soberly, righteously, and godly in the present age, looking for the blessed hope and glorious appearing of our great God and Savior Jesus Christ, who gave Himself for us, that He might redeem us from every lawless deed and purify for Himself His own special people, zealous for good works (Titus 2:11-14, NKJV).

Do you need grace and help and wisdom for every day life? Look to Jesus.

Seek the LORD and His strength; Seek His face continually (Psalm 105:4, NASB).

You have said, “Seek my face.” My heart says to you, “Your face, Lord, do I seek” (Psalm 27:8).

Looking to Jesus day after day,
Trusting His love each step of the way,
Knowing that He so willingly shares
All of my sorrows, troubles and cares.

Refrain:
Looking to Jesus—looking to Him,
Whether the path be sunny or dim;
Holding His hand by night and by day,
Trusting His love each step of the way.

Looking to Jesus when I am sad,
Looking to Jesus when I am glad,
Having no fear of tempest or foe,
Singing His praises, onward I go.

Looking to Jesus when I’m opprest,
Looking to Him for comfort and rest,
Shunning the world, its clamor and strife,
Looking to Him who crowneth my life.

Looking to Jesus me to defend,
Shield and encourage unto the end;
Knowing that He has buried my past,
Looking to Him for glory at last.

James Rowe, Public Domain

Seek the Lord

(I often link up with some of these bloggers.)

When You’re at Your Lowest

Posted on by
When you're at you're lowest, God is there

Darlene Deibler Rose and her husband, Russell, were missionaries in New Guinea when the Japanese took possession of the area during WWII. When the Japanese separated the men from the women, Russell’s last words to Darlene were, “Remember one thing, dear: God said that he would never leave us nor forsake us.” She never saw him again.

The women were taken to a prison camp, where the bulk of Darlene’s book, Evidence Not Seen: A Woman’s Miraculous Faith in the Jungles of World War II, takes place.

Darlene received news that Russell died in 1944. Later, she was arrested by the secret police and taken to another prison for “questioning.” The conditions were horrible, to say the least. Darlene also suffered from dysentery, cerebral malaria, and beriberi. She was placed in solitary confinement.

Through all her troubles, Darlene relied on God’s presence with her. She wrote, “I knew that without God, without that consciousness of His Presence in every troubled hour, I could never have made it.”

Then suddenly one day, that presence seemed to leave her. She searched her heart to see if she was harboring any hidden sin. “My prayers, my expressions of worship, seemed to go no higher than the ceiling; there seemed to be no sounding board.” God didn’t seem to be answering any of her questions or prayers.

Heman the Ezrahite must have felt the same way. He wrote Psalm 88, the only psalm of lament that doesn’t end with hope and a renewed perspective

Heman writes that he cries out day and night to God. His soul is “full of troubles.” He has no strength. He feels forgotten, overwhelmed, helpless, and alone. He asks why God has cast him away and hidden His face. The last word of the psalm is “darkness.”

Why did God set such a depressing passage in Scripture, with seemingly no hope or help?

We don’t know all the reasons. But one would be that people feel like this sometimes. Troubles often seem to come in bunches. We’ve prayed for weeks or months, but nothing seems to change. We know God knows what is going on and He loves us—but why does He not alleviate the pain and change the situation? Why does He seem so far off and uncaring?

Even though Heman doesn’t share any outward hope or encouragement, he still expresses faith.

First of all, he comes to God, even though He feels far away.

Secondly, he knows God is the One who allowed the troubles to come. Whatever secondary sources lead to our trials, they could not come without God’s knowledge and permission.

Then Heman persists in prayer. He keeps coming, keeps calling out to God “day and night,” “every day.”

The ESV Study Bible commentary says, “The psalm instills a tough faith in its singers by reminding them to keep turning to God (the “God of my salvation,” v.1), even during these times when it seems that there is no answer being given. . . it helps its singers to see that faith can be real, even when it cannot arrive at strong hope after prayer” (p. 1048).

Job seemed to feel this way at times. He declared, “Though he slay me, I will hope in him” (Job 13:15). He didn’t trust only when he prospered or when prayer was answered the way and time he wanted. He still had questions. He cried out to God. He wished he could speak with the Lord face to face. But he maintained a gritty trust that God was the One who could help him, even though there was no sign of help yet.

Darlene had no Bible with her, but she had memorized Scripture in previous years. As she thought through Scripture she remembered, she prayed,  “Lord, I believe all that the Bible says. I do walk by faith and not by sight. I do not need to feel You near, because Your Word says You will never leave me nor forsake me. Lord, I confirm my faith; I believe.”

Then Hebrews 11;1 came to her mind: “Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.” She wrote:

Evidence not seen — that was what I put my trust in — not in feelings or moments of ecstasy, but in the unchanging Person of Jesus Christ. Suddenly I realized that I was singing:

When darkness veils His lovely face,
I rest on His unchanging grace.
In every high and stormy gale,
My anchor holds within the veil.

On Christ the solid Rock I stand;
All other ground is sinking sand.

I was assured that my faith rested not on feelings, not on moments of ecstasy, but on the Person of my matchless, changeless Savior, in Whom is no shadow caused by turning.

Heman, Job, and Darlene leave behind a testimony to trust God, cling to Him, even at our lowest low. He sees. He knows. He cares. In His time, He will minister His grace.

The LORD is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit. Psalm 34:18

(I often link up with some of these bloggers.)

Criticism Can Be a Blessing

Posted on by
Criticism can be a blessing

I didn’t hear about the first writing conference I attended until shortly before it began. As I scrambled to prepare for it, I emailed the director to ask if I could still send in a manuscript sample for critique, something most conferences offer for a fee. She graciously said yes.

I’d been forewarned that I would be shocked at the number of corrections such a critique would entail. I thought I was prepared, but I still reeled at all the penciled-in notations on my manuscript. Thankfully my critiquer did not use a red pen, or else my pages would have looked like they were bleeding out.

I tried to take in all the comments the editor shared with me at our fifteen-minute meeting. At the end, I became painfully aware that she had not said one good thing about my writing.

The next activity on the schedule was lunch, and as I walked to my car in tears, I almost headed for home. Maybe writing was my dream, not God’s will. Maybe the people who had complimented my writing in the past were just being kind.

As I ate lunch alone, I pondered what to do. I finally felt God wanted me to stay. The conference and the hotel had already been paid for, so I might as well take advantage of them.

And I was glad I did. The rest of the conference was a wonderful experience and left me filled up and ready to go home and tackle my writing.

As I looked back over my submitted manuscript and tried to decipher my notes, I began to appreciate the editor’s comments. I thought I had a good grasp of grammar because I loved English classes and usually made A’s. But a few decades after graduating, I’d forgotten some things and developed bad habits. Plus, a few standards had changed over the years. I became appalled at the glaring errors I made, not only in this piece, but in years of blogging and newsletter writing. I wanted to go back and edit all my blog posts.

The two major errors the editor pointed out stuck with me. Perhaps the sting of the criticism embedded those issues deeper than they otherwise would have been. I still wish the editor might have found something positive to say. But ultimately, I was thankful for the correction because it led to a vast improvement in my writing and a new watchfulness. In fact, at the same conference the following year, two of my contest pieces won awards, which was a great encouragement.

(By the way, don’t let this experience deter you from submitting a manuscript for critique if you have the opportunity. My subsequent critiques at other conferences were much more positive experiences.)

Oddly, we all know we’re far from perfect, but we bristle when anyone points out our flaws. When someone discreetly lets me know my slip is showing or tucks a tag into my collar, I’m initially irritated. After a minute, I remind myself they are just trying to help. I really don’t want to venture out with a drooping slip or visible clothing tag, so ultimately I am grateful someone took the time to save me from further embarrassment.

The Bible repeatedly emphasizes the benefit of listening to correction:

The ear that listens to life-giving reproof will dwell among the wise. Whoever ignores instruction despises himself, but he who listens to reproof gains intelligence (Proverbs 15:31-32).

A fool despises his father’s instruction, but whoever heeds reproof is prudent (Proverbs 15:5).

Poverty and disgrace come to him who ignores instruction, but whoever heeds reproof is honored. (Proverbs 13:18).

Like a gold ring or an ornament of gold is a wise reprover to a listening ear
(Proverbs 25:12).

It is better for a man to hear the rebuke of the wise than to hear the song of fools (Ecclesiastes 7:5).

Think of students, athletes, musicians, and others: none of them would learn and grow if no one pointed out their mistakes or strengthened them where they were weak.

A quote of C. H. Spurgeon’s inspires me when I balk at criticism or suggestion: “Brother, if any man thinks ill of you, do not be angry with him; for you are worse than he thinks you to be.”

Of course, not all criticism is justified. When I consider a book from an author I don’t know, I look at the one- and two-star reviews as well as the five-star ones. Some of the lower reviews reveal problems with the book, but some are ridiculous.

And some people go overboard, acting as if criticism is a spiritual gift, constantly sharing their seemingly superior wisdom and opinions when they’re not called for. A study of how—and whether—to graciously offer counsel would be a subject for another blog post, but James tells us “The wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere” (3:17).

My first response to any criticism should be to examine it to see if there is any merit to it. Maybe the person is just critical or doesn’t understand. But instead of assuming so, I need to accept that they are probably trying to help. Even if they are a little off, there might be some seed of truth in their observation.

Also, instead of avoiding criticism, I need to ask for it. That first manuscript critique was hard to take, but it was also a spur to humility and an eye-opening realization of how much I still needed to learn. Reading books and blog posts about writing helps, but joining a critique group has been one of the best steps I’ve taken to improve my writing. If we want to grow in any area, it’s vital to put ourselves in a position to learn from those who know more than we do and receive their correction and advice.

I don’t think anyone likes criticism. But if we receive it humbly, look for truth in it, and improve from it, we are blessed.

Has any criticism or correction helped you?

Wise people listen to criticism

(I often link up with some of these bloggers.)

The Most Important Way to Change

Posted on by

If we become concerned about a character trait we see in ourselves that we’d like to change, we might search Google for blog posts. “Ten Ways to Tame Your Temper” or “Six Ways to Curb a Sharp Tongue.” *

We might read a book on the subject, seek counsel, or even do a topical Bible study.

We might set standards and rules for ourselves.

There’s nothing wrong with any of those approaches. I’ve used them all and found help in each one.

But we often forget the primary means God gave us to change.

“And we all, with unveiled face, beholding the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from one degree of glory to another. For this comes from the Lord who is the Spirit” (2 Corinthians 3:18).

We’re changed bit by bit by beholding His glory.

Well, how does that work?

When Moses asked to see God’s glory, God said, “I will make all my goodness pass before you.” Then “the Lord passed before him and proclaimed, ‘The Lord, the Lord, a God merciful and gracious, slow to anger, and abounding in steadfast love and faithfulness” (Exodus 33:18-23; 34:5-7).

GotQuestions defines the glory of God as “the beauty of His spirit . . . that emanates from His character, from all that He is.”

John Piper says, “The glory of God is the manifest beauty of his holiness. It is the going-public of his holiness. It is the way he puts his holiness on display for people to apprehend. So, the glory of God is the holiness of God made manifest.”

When we read and study our Bibles or listen to sermons, we don’t just look for principles, helpful as those are. We look for God. What does this passage say about Him? What is it demonstrating to me about Him? We behold Him, see Him, worship Him in all His goodness.

When I’m battling pride, nothing helps me more than thinking of Jesus, “who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross” (Philippians 2:6-8).

When I’m craving things I shouldn’t have, I think of Jesus being tempted with bread after 40 days of fasting in the wilderness. He had a legitimate need to eat, but He resisted Satan’s temptations to partake on his terms.

When I have trouble loving others as I should, I think how Jesus loved me when I was unlovable and undeserving.

When I’d rather hold a grudge than forgive, I think how He has forgiven me so much more than anything I’m asked to forgive others.

When I see Him in the gospels meeting people’s needs, busy but not stressed, I’m helped to avoid becoming frenzied with all I need to do.

Interruptions are my biggest pet peeves. Realizing that the incident with the woman with the issue of blood was an interruption to Jesus’ journey to heal Jairus’ daughter added a dimension to these situations I had not realized before. Jesus was not ruffled at the delay. He took it in stride.

When I behold Him, I see my limitations. I’m painfully aware I am not Him. I’m humbled to realize just how much I need Him.

When I behold Him, anxiety flees away. He can take care of any problem that comes up.

Hannah Anderson wrote in Humble Roots: How Humility Grounds and Nourishes Your Soul about the Colossians who “believed they could reach purity by adhering to certain standards” and were “holding fast to their regulations” instead of Christ.

Ultimately the Colossians’ pride was revealed by what they were looking at, by what had captured their attention. Instead of being concerned with eternal realities, they were concerned with regulating temporary realities. Instead of being consumed with Christ’s glory, they were consumed with their own. But it is only by beholding Christ that we are changed. It is only by beholding Christ who Himself took “on the form of a servant” that we learn to serve each other (p. 94).

Standards and regulations have their place. But real heart change occurs as we behold God’s glory.

May our heart’s cry be like David’s:

O God, you are my God; earnestly I seek you; my soul thirsts for you; my flesh faints for you, as in a dry and weary land where there is no water. So I have looked upon you in the sanctuary, beholding your power and glory. Because your steadfast love is better than life, my lips will praise you (Psalm 63:1-3).

One thing have I asked of the Lord, that will I seek after: that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord and to inquire in his temple (Psalm 27:4).

Changed to be like Jesus

___
*Made up titles.

(I often link up with some of these bloggers.)

How to Return to Your First Love

Posted on by
How to return to your first love

Imagine a good friend tells you she’s thinking of leaving her husband. The magic is gone. They don’t love each other any more. They’re just going through the motions.

After listening to your friend, if she’s open, you might suggest several things. As I thought of these, I realized many of them paralleled how we could return to our first love spiritually.

In Revelation 2:1-7, God instructs John to write a letter to the church at Ephesus. They are commended for several things: They’ve worked hard and endured patiently for His name’s sake. They cared for truth and have tested and rooted out false apostles. Those are all good traits. Yet, Jesus said, “I have this against you, that you have abandoned the love you had at first.” It’s possible to work hard for the Lord and stand for truth, yet not do so out of love for Him.

Jesus commands them to “Remember therefore from where you have fallen; repent, and do the works you did at first.” Otherwise, He warns, He’ll have to remove them.

So how do we return to our first love? We can’t just flip a switch and turn on the right feelings.

Pray. The first step is to ask for help. A marriage on the brink of divorce has a lot of deep issues. Usually by the time a couple gets to that point, they’ve already made up their minds, and it’s extremely hard to turn things around. They’re going to need God’s help.

Spiritually, we start at the same place. We may be confused. “I thought I was doing everything right.” We need wisdom and insight to see how we’ve drifted into serving without love. It’s true, love is not just a feeling. But according to this passage and 1 Corinthians 13, love is not just service, either.

Romans 5:5 tells us “God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.” And love is a fruit of the Holy Spirit (Galatians 5: 22-23).

Paul prays for love in various churches:

  • That they might be “rooted and grounded in love” and “may have strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge” (Ephesians 3:18-19).
  • That their “love may abound more and more, with knowledge and all discernment” (Philippians 1:9).
  • That “the Lord make you increase and abound in love for one another and for all” (1 Thessalonians 3:12).

We can pray these things for ourselves in our relationships with others and the Lord.

Remember His attributes. You could ask your friend to remember what attracted her to her husband in the first place. Sure, his looks and physique changed over the years (so did hers). But she probably married him because she saw something in his character that she liked.

A few years ago, I read Jen Wilkin’s book on God’s attributes: None Like Him:10 Ways God is Different From Us (and Why That’s a Good Thing) and In His Image: 10 Ways God Calls Us to Reflect His Character (linked to my reviews). I expected that studying God’s attributes would inspire worship, but I was surprised to find that the study also increased my love for God. I shouldn’t have been surprised: the more we meditate on how wonderful He is, of course we’re going to love Him even more.

Remember your past history. When a couple has been together for a while, they accumulate a lot of shared experiences: fun times, the trials they worked through, the inside jokes. They have a history they share with no one else. Remembering those times might draw them closer together.

The apostle John wrote, “We love Him because He first loved us” (1 John 4:19, NKJV). Calling to mind the ways God has shown love to me inspires love for Him.

Looking back over my history with God warms my heart. He set off a series of events to bring me to faith in Himself. He loved me and drew me before I knew Him.

He has blessed me in countless ways ever since. Some years ago, I was inspired to create a list of “Ebenezers.” Samuel once set up for Israel a stone he called an Ebenezer, meaning “a stone of help,” to commemorate what God had done for them. So one year I wrote an extensive list of those special moments in my life when God intervened in a way that could only have come from Him. Remembering answered prayer and times God spoke to my heart from His Word, and so many other evidences of His care in my life, fuels my love for Him.

Psalm 63 gives a vivid picture of such remembrances:

My soul will be satisfied as with fat and rich food,
and my mouth will praise you with joyful lips,
when I remember you upon my bed,
and meditate on you in the watches of the night;
for you have been my help,
and in the shadow of your wings I will sing for joy (verses 5-7).

Spend focused time together. Life can settle into routines, and couples end up just passing each other while doing errands, talking only about the mundane affairs of life. We need time to set aside everything and just focus on each other, share our hearts, and listen to each other. That may be a date night or just sitting at the table with coffee.

The same happens with God. As I said last week, routines help establish time with the Lord. But after a while, they can feel just routine, like we’re just working through a list and not connecting. Remembering that I am meeting with my Lord alone helps me refocus.

Forgive. A couple on the brink of divorce has accumulated a lot of hurts and slights. It’s easy to only see the negative. It may take time and counseling to work through all of that, but at some point, they’ll need to learn to forgive each other.

Elisabeth Elliot said once that a wife may like 80% of what her husband says and does, yet focus and harp on the 20% she doesn’t like. Once we get fixated on the negative, it fills our vision til that’s all we can see.

This one is different in our relationship with God. Some people speak of “forgiving God” when He does things we don’t like, but I cringe at such talk. We don’t need to forgive Him. He’s the Holy, pure, all-wise, all-powerful, righteous God of the universe! He does nothing wrong. It’s a little audacious to think of us forgiving Him.

Yet, He does things that confuse us. He may not have answered a heartfelt prayer. He may have allowed a tragedy. We might be hurt, resentful, or even angry. But we’re in trouble if we hold these things against Him. Jesus said, ” Blessed is the one who is not offended by me” (Matthew 11:6).

Thankfully, we have the psalms and prophets as examples of people pouring out their hearts before God, sometimes in confusion and anguish and anger. They remind themselves of what they know to be true about God—that He loves them, that He will take care of them and meet their needs— and they find peace. So we need to remind ourselves of who God is and His right to rule in our lives according to His purposes. And we remind ourselves that He doesn’t bring suffering in our lives capriciously. “For the Lord will not cast off forever, but, though he cause grief, he will have compassion according to the abundance of his steadfast love; for he does not afflict from his heart or grieve the children of men” (Lamentations 3:31-33).

Put the other first. When human relationships are on the verge of breaking up, selfishness has likely crept in, probably on both sides. One of my former professors (Dr. Walter Fremont) used to say love is the self-sacrificing desire to meet the need of the cherished object. It’s easy to focus on what we want others to do for us—or what they’re failing to do for us—and overlook our own failings.

God doesn’t “need” anything from us. But there are things He asks of us. We ask Him to bless our plans without considering whether they are His plans. Paul reminds us, “If then you have been raised with Christ, seek the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth” (Colossians 3:1-2).

I don’t mean to be simplistic about either romantic love or spiritual love. There may be a lot of layers to peel back and issues to work through. People may need help and counsel in either case. But these steps can get us started in the right direction.

What helps you rekindle your love for God?

May the Lord direct your hearts to the love of God

(I often link up with some of these bloggers.)

Devotional Time in Different Seasons of Life

Posted on by

Good routines help us establish good habits.

Reading the Bible is not just a good habit to get into: the Bible is our food, our letter from God. But sometimes it takes implementing a good routine to make time to read Scripture.

But then we have another problem: when our routine is upset, our good habits fly away.

My best time to read the Bible and pray is in the morning, before my mind gets cluttered with a thousand other things. Having my devotions, or quiet time, first thing helps set my heart in the right position and fortifies me for the day ahead.

But if I oversleep, have to get up early for an appointment, travel, have company, or get sick, my routine is disrupted. It’s not impossible to come back to a quiet time later in the day, but it’s much harder for me.

I imagine the same is true for you as well, whether your best time is in the morning, or right before bed, or somewhere between.

And then some disruptions occur not just in one day, but in a whole season of life.

What are the difficulties peculiar to each phase of life?

Childhood and teen years. I didn’t grow up in a Bible-reading home and didn’t hear about the importance of reading the Bible until I was around sixteen. I was busy with studies, a part-time job, and responsibilities at home. But my biggest hurdle was just getting a regular routine established. I had to start over many times. Eventually, devotional time became a matter of “want to” rather than “supposed to,” though that struggle pops up again and again.

My second big problem was understanding what I read. I had not grown up in church, and I was a new Christian. It didn’t occur to me to ask someone for help when I came to difficult passages. I just shrugged my shoulders and kept going until I came to something that spoke to my heart. But because most of it was new to me, I got plenty to “feed” on and to grow. I wasn’t aware of study Bibles then which contained explanatory notes, but that would have helped.

Early adult years. College was one of my busiest times of life. I was always an eager student, but college life was harder and more time-consuming than I expected.

In a Christian college, it’s easy to just ride on the spiritual atmosphere. We had chapel most days, prayer groups and devotions in the dorms, Bible reading and prayer at the beginning of most classes, and Bible classes themselves. Those are all beneficial, but none of them is the same as meeting with the Lord alone in a personal way.

Even if one does not attend college, life as a new adult has challenges. Working a full-time job is an adjustment. All the responsibilities of adulthood, like cooking, cleaning, grocery-shopping, are now on your shoulders. You may scramble to get going in the morning, spend time with friends or take care of responsibilities after work, and then fall into bed at night.

Then when you get married, you have all of that plus the adjustments of getting used to living with another person. Though marriage has lovely moments, there are small irritations with someone else’s routines conflicting with yours.

However, this period of time was actually the easiest for me in regard to devotional routine. Life was certainly busy. But college life was very structured and scheduled. It was easy to schedule the time to spend with the Lord. And with dorm roommates or early marriage, some discussion and flexibility helped work around each other.

Parenthood. This stage of life was hardest for me to maintain a quiet time, especially after my second child was born. Schedules evaporated. What I called the zombie weeks of disrupted sleep and nighttime feeding made me groggy. During the baby’s nap time, I had to choose between cleaning, sleeping, or reading my Bible. Usually sleep won out.

Then during the second child’s nap times, I had a preschooler who needed attention.

Getting up early—if I even could—would often result in the kids waking up, too.

I listened to Christian radio more then, but like chapel services and Bible classes, that didn’t take the place of one-on-one time with the Lord.

Don’t get me wrong–I loved my children and enjoyed them. But having solitude and quiet time was hard these years. I’d get to the end of the day and pray tearfully, “Lord, I don’t know when I could have had time with you today.”

It finally occurred to me to ask Him at the beginning of the day to help me be alert to opportunities to read for a bit. I couldn’t have a big, sit-down meal spiritually. But I could snack throughout the day. I wrote more about this in Encouragement for Mothers of Young Children.

The Taxi Years. That’s what I called the era when it seemed like we spent more time in the car than anywhere else, driving the kids to school, piano lessons, sports practices, friend’s houses, church events. I had quiet time at home during the day, but I also had to run errands, clean, and grocery shop. And at this time I was also the most active volunteering for church and school.

When we homeschooled for four years, solitude during the day was at a premium. We always had a quiet time in the afternoons when everyone was expected to read quietly or do something in their rooms, if they were too old for naps. That was my devotional time if I hadn’t had it earlier.

Empty Nest and Senior years. You’d think this stage of life would be the greatest time for Bible reading and prayer. And in some ways it is. But new challenges arrive in the form of physical issues or sleep problems. When one spouse retires and is suddenly home all day, the other’s routine needs adjusting. Often one parent or the other requires extra help, if not full time caregiving. Adult children have needs we like to be able to help with.

Illness. At any stage of life, an unexpected accident or illness can disrupt life for weeks, months, or even years. Some may think that extra time resting would allow for even more prayer or Bible reading time. But you’ve probably experienced being fuzzy-headed when you have a bad cold for a few days. Imagine that feeling over the course of a long-term illness. Amy Carmichael wrote in Rose from Brier, after being an invalid for a few years:

I have not found myself that illness makes prayer easier, nor do any of our family who have been ill tell me that they have found it so. Prayerfulness does not seem to be a flower of the spirit that grows of itself. When we are well perhaps we rather take it for granted that it does, as though what is sometimes called a “sick-bed” offered natural soil for that precious flower. I do not think that it does. A bed can be a place of dullness of spirit as well as of body, and prayer is, after all, work—the most strenuous work in all the world. And yet it is our only way of joining the fighting force. . .  So what can we do about it? (p. 199).

One night, in severe pain, when she could “no more gather myself up to pray than I could turn in bed without . . .help,” she came to Psalm 109:21: “But do thou for me, O GOD the Lord.”

And soon the prayer passed into the most restful kind of intercession, the only kind the ill can attain unto, for they cannot pray in detail and they may know little or nothing about the needs of their dearest. But He knows all, down to the smallest wish of the heart. So we do not need to coin our gold in words, we could not if we tried: we are far too tired for that, and He who knows our frame does not ask us to do anything so arduous. Do Thou for her, do Thou for him, do Thou for them, O God the Lord (p. 200).

In any stage, the first necessity is to make time with the Lord a priority. Other duties and distractions will always pull us.

In my early married years, our senior pastor was an older man and our associate pastor was perhaps in his early thirties. They were discussing with someone else the struggles to keep a consistent quiet time. The younger man looked to the older pastor and said, “I’m sure this isn’t a problem for you.” Surely a dedicated man of God who had walked with Him for decades didn’t have to wrestle with time or interruptions or his own flesh to make time to spend with God.

The older man just laughed. Of course he still struggled. As long as we have an old nature pulling against our best intentions and an active enemy trying to trip us up, we’ll struggle.

But we remind ourselves that time in the Bible in prayer is not just one more thing to do. We greatly need to fellowship with our Father, to draw grace and help and strength from Him.

The second necessity is flexibility. I don’t like a rigid schedule, but I like a certain amount of structure and predictability to my days. When interruptions or distractions come, I need to look for other ways and times to meet with the Lord. Sometimes that means setting aside other reading or pleasurable activities. I admit I don’t always feel like switching gears if I sit down to read or watch something or scroll through my phone and I remember I haven’t met with the Lord that day. But when I set aside what I was doing to spend time with Him, I am always blessed.

The third thing we need to do: rely on God’s grace. God isn’t going to zap us with a bad day for punishment if we miss meeting with Him. The Bible doesn’t tell us to read a certain amount of time or verses every day. But it does tell us to meditate on God’s Word day and night. This is one area where previous memorization comes in handy.

Some days or seasons of life are busier or more exhausting than others. A. W. Tozer said, “We must not select a few favorite passages to the exclusion of others. Nothing less than a whole Bible can make a whole Christian.” We need times to dig deep and soak long in God’s truth. If we only read a verse a day or stayed in the Psalms over the course of a lifetime, we’d be pretty weak. But during busy or exhausting days or seasons of life, when we can truly only read a verse or two, God will feed us.

Have you had to change your devotional routine in different stages of life? What helped you?

All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable. @ Timothy 3:16

(I often link up with some of these bloggers.)

Do You Want to Be Free?

Posted on by

I did not start going to church regularly until my mid-teens. It seems like we sang a lot of songs then about being free from sin.

One our youth choir sang was called “Set Me Free.” That’s the only place I ever heard this particular song. I haven’t been able to remember enough of the words to look it up.

One we sang often in my early married years was “Free From the Law.”

Then there was, “Power in the Blood“:

Would you be free from the burden of sin?
There’s pow’r in the blood, pow’r in the blood;
Would you o’er evil a victory win?
There’s wonderful pow’r in the blood.

Would you be free from your passion and pride?
There’s pow’r in the blood, pow’r in the blood;
Come for a cleansing to Calvary’s tide–
There’s wonderful pow’r in the blood.

There is pow’r, pow’r, wonder-working pow’r
In the blood of the Lamb;
There is pow’r, pow’r, wonder-working pow’r
In the precious blood of the Lamb.
– Lewis E. Jones

And “I Will Sing the Wondrous Story“:

I was bruised, but Jesus healed me;
Faint was I from many a fall;
Sight was gone, and fears possessed me,
But He freed me from them all.
– Francis H. Rowley

There are a couple I haven’t heard in church, like “For Freedom, Christ Has Set Us Free” and “Glorious Freedom.”

It occurred to me that I don’t hear these kinds of songs, or the theme of freedom from sin in Christ, much any more.

Jesus once said “if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed” (John 8:36). I wonder if the world doesn’t appreciate the impact of that statement because they don’t understand that they’re not free.

They think they are.

2 Peter warns of false prophets and teachers who use false words to entice people. They appeal to greed and lust to deceive. “They promise them freedom, but they themselves are slaves of corruption. For whatever overcomes a person, to that he is enslaved” (verse 19).

Their chains are so pleasurable, they don’t realize they are bound. They’re so comfortable and having such fun, they don’t want to be free.

But the pleasures of sin, Hebrews 11:25 says, are only for a short season.

Jesus also said that He is the light of the world. We need to pray that He will shine in people’s hearts and show them their need of Him and His love for them.

Jesus said He is the bread of life. He invites, “If anyone thirsts, let him come to me and drink” (John 7:37). We need to pray God would create in hearts hunger and thirst for Him greater than what the world has to offer.

And we need to tell them about Him. May they find that “the law of the Spirit of life has set you free in Christ Jesus from the law of sin and death” (Romans 8:2).

The whole world was lost in the darkness of sin,
The Light of the world is Jesus!
Like sunshine at noonday, His glory shone in;
The Light of the world is Jesus!

No darkness have we who in Jesus abide;
The Light of the world is Jesus!
We walk in the light when we follow our Guide!
The Light of the world is Jesus!

Ye dwellers in darkness with sin-blinded eyes,
The Light of the world is Jesus!
Go, wash at His bidding, and light will arise;
The Light of the world is Jesus!

Come to the light, ’tis shining for thee;
Sweetly the light has dawned upon me;
Once I was blind, but now I can see:
The Light of the world is Jesus!
– P. P. Bliss

(I often link up with some of these bloggers.)

A Steady Soul

Posted on by

One September morning almost twenty-eight years ago, my left hand started feeling a little funny, like I’d slept on it wrong. I shook and flexed it while I continued packing my husband’s lunch for the day.

After a while, I realized that numbish feeling was spreading up my arm.

Then it started in both feet, spreading upward.

Within three hours, my left arm, both legs, and my lower torso were numb. I couldn’t walk on my own. I developed a laundry list of other symptoms.

After multitudes of tests and blood draws over eight days in the hospital, I was diagnosed with transverse myelitis.

Transverse Myelitis occurs when a virus hits the spine, triggering an autoimmune response which causes the body to attack the myelin sheath around the nerves as well as the virus. Symptoms vary depending on where along the spine the attack occurred. If the lower spine is affected, one might experience numbness and tingling. An attack high on the spine, however, could result in losing the ability to breathe, requiring a ventilator.

My spine was affected in the thoracic region. With much prayer and months of physical therapy, I progressed from a wheelchair to a walker to a cane to wobbly steps on my own.

I still have numb areas and odd sensations. But my biggest problem is balance.

I can walk in a straight line on level ground without problems most days. But uneven ground, slopes, and stairs are a challenge.

Sometimes people will offer me an arm for support, which helps. But what helps the most is a handrail, something solid and unmovable.

Oddly, though, I have the most trouble with balance when standing still.

Proprioreception has to do with knowing where your body is in space. Some people might not know where their hands and feet are without looking at them. I don’t have that problem, but if I stand still for more than a few minutes I lose balance. Usually I’ll inch towards a chair or wall to touch as a reference point to reset my bearings.

I told you all of that to tell you this:

A few years ago when I read 2 Peter 2 in a new-to-me translation, the word “unsteady” jumped out at me because I well knew what being unsteady felt like.

Peter talks in this chapter about those with unsteady souls. Other translations say unstable, unestablished, unsettled. These souls are easily enticed by false teachers (verse 14).

How do false teachers entice these souls? 1 Peter speaks of the false prophets’ sensuality, lust, greed, passion, so they “entice by sensual passions” (verse 18). James 1:14 uses the same Greek word for “entice,” which carries the idea of baiting, alluring, deceiving, when it says, “But each person is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own desire.” They “despise authority” (verse 10). “They promise them freedom, but they themselves are slaves of corruption” (verse 19). They “exploit you with false words” (verse 3). They’re blasphemous (verses 10-13).

Probably many of the people who fall away to false teachers are not saved in the first place, but weak or new believers are susceptible as well. A true Christian can’t lose his or her salvation, but a believer can get tangled in false doctrines to their own confusion as well as that of everyone in their sphere of influence. But even those of us who think we’re strong need to “take heed lest we fall.” (1 Corinthians 10:12).

How can we make sure we’re not unsteady or unstable spiritually?

By orienting ourselves with the solid, unchanging Word of God.

Rest on the Bible’s sure foundation. Earlier in his letter, Peter told his readers that God’s Word was more sure than even his experience watching Jesus’ transfiguration (2 Peter 1:16-19, KJV).

Know that Scripture comes from God. Peter assured that that “no prophecy of Scripture comes from someone’s own interpretation. For no prophecy was ever produced by the will of man, but men spoke from God as they were carried along by the Holy Spirit” (2 Peter 1:20-21).

Know God Through His Word. Peter said “His divine power has granted to us everything pertaining to life and godliness, through the true knowledge of Him who called us by His own glory and excellence,” which we learn about from “His precious and magnificent promises, so that by them you may become partakers of the divine nature, having escaped the corruption that is in the world on account of lust.” (1:3-4, NASB). Everything pertaining to life and godliness! The first time this verse impacted me, I was nearly bowled over. There may be many things we don’t comprehend about God, but He’s given us everything we need to live for Him through knowing Him through His Word.

Don’t twist the Scriptures as the unstable do. “There are some things in them that are hard to understand, which the ignorant and unstable twist to their own destruction, as they do the other Scriptures” (2 Peter 3:15-16). The unsteady twist (wrest in the KJV) the very thing which could stabilize them. We read it in context so we understand its meaning. We don’t wrangle it to make it say what we want it to say. We don’t adjust it to us: we adjust ourselves to it.

Be watchful. “Take care that you are not carried away with the error of lawless people and lose your own stability (2 Peter 3:17).

Keep growing “in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ” (3:18).

Listen to sound teaching. Contrast the characteristics Peter lists of false teachers in 2 Peter to what he says about godly shepherds in 1 Peter 5. Paul tells Timothy in 2 Timothy 4: “preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. For the time is coming when people will not endure sound teaching, but having itching ears they will accumulate for themselves teachers to suit their own passions, and will turn away from listening to the truth and wander off into myths.” We seek to feed our souls His truth rather than feeding our own desires.

Jesus said the one who hears his words and does them is like a man who built his house on a rock which was unshaken by winds and flood waters.

So we watch ourselves, that we’re not being led away of wrong desires. We read and listen to God’s Word as it’s written, in context, not trying to twist it. We listen to pastors and teachers who faithfully proclaim God’s Word. We we obey it. We get to know our Savior better and better and remind ourselves of His truth. and we keep growing spiritually. Doing all of these things might bring persecution, which Peter discusses often in both of his letters. But we can trust God to keep us and deliver us. Then we can say, “My steps have held to Your paths; my feet have not slipped” (Psalm 17:5).

Keep steady my steps according to your promise,
and let no iniquity get dominion over me (Psalm 119:133).

Revised from the archives.

(I often link up with some of these bloggers.)

Fathers and Children

Posted on by

Fathers have a tremendous impact on their children, for good or bad. We need God’s grace to overcome the effects of a bad father and not lose the benefits of a good father.

In Keep a Quiet Heart, Elisabeth Elliot shared an excerpt from a book titled Fathers and Sons written by Phillip Howard, her grandfather:

Do you remember that encouraging word of Thomas Fuller’s, a chaplain of Oliver Cromwell’s time? It’s a good passage for a father in all humility and gratitude to tuck away in his memory treasures:

“’Lord, I find the genealogy of my Savior strangely checkered with four remarkable changes in four immediate generations.

Rehoboam begat Abijah; that is, a bad father begat a bad son.
Abijah begat Asa; that is, a bad father begat a good son.
Asa begat Jehoshaphat; that is, a good father begat a good son.
Jehoshaphat begat Joram; that is, a good father begat a bad son.

I see, Lord, from hence that my father’s piety cannot be entailed; that is bad news for me. But I see also that actual impiety is not always hereditary; that is good news for my son.”

We’re not doomed by a bad father. We may have to overcome what we learned from him. We may have long-lasting wounds of spirit by how he treated us. But we don’t have to follow in his footsteps. When we turn from our own way in repentance and faith and follow Christ, we have a new, perfect, kind Father. The better we know Him, the more He changes us to be more like Himself. What we missed in our earthly father we can find in our heavenly one.

He came to his own, and his own people did not receive him. But to all who did receive him, who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God (John 1:11-12).

See what kind of love the Father has given to us, that we should be called children of God (1 John 3:1).

Similarly, we’re not saved by a good father. His teaching may help us on the road of life. His example may be the highest we have to follow. His love and care may settle deep in our hearts and give us needed security and confidence. But his faith is not automatically passed down to us. We each have to choose to believe in, follow, and obey God personally. Our earthly father can’t be to us everything our heavenly Father is, but he can point us to Him.

And you, Solomon my son, know the God of your father and serve him with a whole heart and with a willing mind, for the LORD searches all hearts and understands every plan and thought. If you seek him, he will be found by you, but if you forsake him, he will cast you off forever (1 Chronicles 28:9).

The LORD is my strength and my song, and he has become my salvation; this is my God, and I will praise him, my father’s God, and I will exalt him. (Exodus 15:2).

Of course, most fathers are a mixture of good and bad. They’ll have some habits we want to emulate and others we want to avoid.

It’s natural for children to want to forge their own paths, make their own decisions, follow their own way as they mature. We become independent of our earthly fathers. But we should become ever more dependent on our heavenly Father. He can take us farther than our earthly father can.

There’s no greater example of parenthood than our heavenly Father. As we spend time with Him and behold Him, we become more like Him.

Fatherlike He tends and spares us;
Well our feeble frame He Knows.
In His hands He gently bears us,
Rescues us from all our foes.
Alleluia!
Alleluia!
Widely yet His mercy flows!

Henry Lyte, “Praise My Soul, the King of Heaven”

(I often link up with some of these bloggers.)