Is Your Testimony Dramatic?

Posted on August 25, 2025 by Barbara Harper

Adoniram Judson, one of America’s first missionaries in the early 1800s, has one of the most dramatic testimonies I ever heard. He came from a Christian home, but in college fell in with a group who didn’t believe as he had been taught. His best friend was Jacob Eames, a “free-thinker” who was a skeptic. Though Jacob believed there was some type of God, he rejected the Bible.

Adoniram’s departure from the faith broke his parents’ hearts. His father tried to talk with him, but could not match Adoniram’s brilliant reasoning.

Adoniram wanted to go into the theater and perhaps become a playwright. But when the theater group he found had appalling morals.

He traveled more, ending up one night at an inn that had only one room left. The innkeeper apologized, saying the man in the next room was dying. Adoniram assured the man he would not be bothered. But he could hear the man’s groaning all through the night. Adoniram was shaken with thoughts of what happens after death.

As Adoniram sought the innkeeper the next morning to settle his account, he asked about the dying man. The innkeeper confirmed that the man did die. As they discussed the situation further, it came out that the dead man was Adoniram’s friend, Jacob Eames.

Adoniram was stunned–not only because Eames was so young and his friend, but because he wondered for the first time if he might be wrong. He felt that only God could have orchestrated events that led him to this time and place.

He wasn’t saved immediately, but this was the first step in his coming to true faith in God.

I’ve heard other thrilling conversion stories through the years: twin brothers in a former church and half-brothers in our current church who were miraculously saved from drug addiction, a man caught in a piece of machinery who would have died without God’s intervention, the apostle Paul’s Damascus Road experience.

Such exciting accounts can make some of us feel our testimonies are a little lacking.

But consider what salvation is: a new birth. We’ve known people with exciting birth stories as well: One friend made it to the hospital, but not past the lobby when her baby came. My brother was born at home, too quickly to go anywhere, even though the doctor had told my mother that day that the baby wouldn’t come for a few days yet. Another friend planned to deliver at a small university hospital, but complications led to being transported by ambulance to a larger hospital in town.

Yet every birth is a miracle to those involved. Parents greet their newborns with love and joy no matter what details led to the baby’s arrival.

Jesus told about a man leaving ninety-nine sheep behind to find the one lost one and rejoicing when he found it. He went on to say, “There will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who need no repentance” (Luke 15:7). He told of a woman finding a lost coin and then calling her friends in to rejoice with her when she found it. Then He reiterated, “Just so, I tell you, there is joy before the angels of God over one sinner who repents.”

The little child who comes to saving faith at home, in Sunday School, or in VBS causes just as much joy in heaven as the hardest criminal who believes.

We tend to think of drug dealers, prostitutes, gangsters, and such as the “worst” sinners. Proverbs 6:16-19 says, “There are six things that the Lord hates, seven that are an abomination to him: haughty eyes, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood,
a heart that devises wicked plans, feet that make haste to run to evil, a false witness who breathes out lies, and one who sows discord among brothers.” Pride, lying, and discord are right up there with shedding innocent blood.

When Jesus was asked which was the greatest commandment, He replied, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength” (Mark 12:30). If that’s the greatest commandment, it follows that the greatest sin is breaking that commandment. And all of us do so every day.

Salvation is turning from darkness to light, becoming God’s child, receiving forgiveness and eternal life, and beginning a personal relationship with God. That’s pretty dramatic in itself, no matter the circumstances that led to it.

(I often link up with some of these bloggers.)

When People Are Late to Church

Posted on August 17, 2025 by Barbara Harper

There was a period of time in another church and state when I was sometimes late to services. One man in particular noticed and commented. For instance, one day when I walked in before the service started, he handed me a bulletin and said, “Once in a row!”

I honestly wasn’t late that often. I don’t know if he was teasing or meant his comments as a prod or jab. I don’t know why it didn’t anger or hurt me. I had to work with him in various capacities, so maybe subconsciously I didn’t want there to be trouble between us.

What he didn’t know was that during that time, I started developing IBS (Irritable Bowel Syndrome). I didn’t know that’s what it was at the time. I just knew I was having unexpected, unexplained digestive problems. No matter how much extra time I gave myself to get ready, I couldn’t count on my body cooperating with me.

Granted, I was sometimes late for other reasons. But all too often, my lateness was due to physical issues that I didn’t want to explain.

In fact, the pressure of trying to get there on time, not wanting to draw attention to myself, not wanting to distract anyone by being late, all made the physical issues worse.

Friends who have traveled to other countries talk about the different regard for time in various places. Seeing someone you know and stopping to talk to them is considered more thoughtful and respectful than rushing past them to get somewhere on time.

But in our Western culture, lateness is regarded as disrespect for those you’re meeting with and a lack of discipline.

And that’s often true. It is frustrating to go to a meeting that doesn’t start for fifteen to twenty minutes because several people weren’t there on time. Then the meeting gets done twenty minutes later than planned. Plus, people streaming in late can be distracting.

But sometimes it just can’t be helped.

Once in another church in another state, we were waiting on one of my sons to get done in the bathroom so we could leave for church. We lived in a split-level, and the door leading downstairs was open. As my son in the bathroom upstairs flushed the toilet, we saw water pour from that bathroom floor through the ceiling below in what was our laundry and workroom. The toilet had clogged, and I guess we had never told my son not to keep flushing the toilet in that case. Somehow we mopped up the mess and miraculously still made it to church on time. We hadn’t told anyone about our morning scenario, but the only thing I remember the guest speaker saying that day was “We just don’t know what it takes for some people to get to church.”

While we don’t want to have a casual attitude about arriving at church (or anywhere else) on time, we shouldn’t have an overly judgmental attitude, either.

Sometimes when I am running late due to stomach issues, especially in the first church I mentioned, I’ve thought, “You know, if I am late, everyone is going to notice. But not many will notice if I don’t show up at all. Maybe I should just stay home.”

I saw a meme recently that went something like this: The writer was late to church, and people scowled and frowned at him for disturbing the service. But when he was late to an AA meeting, everyone was concerned and asked, “Is everything okay?” They realized that his lateness may have indicated he almost didn’t make it, and they knew how desperately he needed to be there.

Hopefully we can find a balance between encouraging people to be on time for church for smoother functioning of the body, yet not judging them when they’re not. We should do our best to be at church on time, just as we would for our jobs or catching an airplane (for me, I’ve found I have to get up four hours before leaving in order for medicine to kick in on time). But, as the guest speaker at my former church said, we don’t know what some people go through just to get to church. A latecomer needs to be met with welcoming smiles of “We’re glad you’re here,” not frowns, scowls, or remarks that make them feel they should not have come.

(I often link up with some of these bloggers.)

What I Learned from a Traumatic Illness

Posted on August 10, 2025 by Barbara Harper

September 1 will mark thirty years since I contracted transverse myelitis. TM is an auto-immune disorder in which a virus attacks the spine, triggering the body to attack not only the virus, but the myelin sheath around the nerves of the spine. An attack low on the spine might bring just a little numbness and tingling. But an attack high on the spine can result in quadriplegia, ventilator-dependency, and even death.

I was affected in the middle, in the thoracic region. My symptoms began with a vague feeling of numbness in my left hand, like I had slept on it wrong. Within three hours, my left arm was numb up to my shoulder as were both legs up to my lower torso. I couldn’t walk on my own. I was having trouble going to the bathroom.

I thought I was having a stroke. That’s the only thing I knew of that would cause parts of the body to suddenly go numb.

As it turns out, a number of ailments can cause sudden numbness. There was no one test to diagnose TM. Instead, tests were performed to rule out any other possible related illness. That took eight days in the hospital.

I was sent home with a few prescriptions and a plan for physical therapy.

Thankfully, I progressed from a wheelchair to a walker to a cane to walking unsteadily on my own over the course of a few months. My ability to walk has improved, but I still can’t run, jump, hop, or walk very well on uneven ground. Oddly, my balance is often affected the most when I am standing still with no support. This is due to TM’s effect on my proprioception. I’m usually fine if I can hold on to or lean against something stationery.

I am not as numb as I was, but I still don’t have full feeling in my left hand or lower legs. I have odd little nerve sensations–feeling like something is touching me when it isn’t, feeling a sudden hot sensation where there is no heat, etc. I can’t wear my wedding ring because it causes a pinging, funny-bone sensation in my hand.

But overall, I am thankful that I recovered to the point of being able to function as I needed to, to take care of my family, and to lead a relatively normal life.

I’ve been jotting down several things I have learned through this experience, and I thought I’d share them with you. I know many of you are going through physical trials or have in the past. Though our details might vary, I hope you’ll find camaraderie and encouragement here.

The unsteady trajectory of healing. It seems that often healing is a one step forward–two steps back process, feeling better one day and worse another. Often in the first couple of years after TM, I felt my symptoms were increasing to the same point they were in the beginning. Though TM is usually a one-time event, some people do have more than one attack. But repeated attacks are also signs of multiple sclerosis. So that specter was in view whenever I felt worse.

The hidden work of healing. Sometimes assessing healing is like watching paint dry. There doesn’t seem to be any progress day by day. But over time, healing gradually takes place unawares, until finally one day we can see definite progress from the previous week or month.

Riding the waves. When my husband and I were taking childbirth classes, our teacher invited a couple from her previous class to come in and share their childbirth experience. The new mom said something like this: during labor, when she wondered how many hours she was going to have to do this, she felt weary and defeated. But if she only concentrated on one contraction at a time, she was able to get through them better. She likened it to riding each wave of a surf as it came in.

That illustration has stayed with me all these years through many applications. When symptoms flared up or I had a bad day, I thought, I only have to deal with this day, this moment.

The value of rest. The first few months after TM, if I wanted to go anywhere, I would have to rest up the day of the event. Afterward, it wasn’t a matter of making myself rest: my body crashed and I couldn’t have done anything else anyway.

But I noticed I hardly ever had a cold or any other sickness during that time. I realized that maybe rest was nipping any other colds or viruses in the bud. When I began having heart rhythm issues, I couldn’t take decongestants any more. So rest and Tylenol and cough drops at the first sign of a cold became my go-to treatment. Most of the time, I got over them much faster than usual.

The need to strive. This sounds like a contradiction to the need for rest. It’s hard to balance sometimes. Usually we don’t know we’ve overdone it until it’s too late. But we don’t generally make much progress unless we stretch ourselves beyond what’s comfortable.

The value of an ordinary day. When I was in the hospital and recovering at home, one of the things I most wanted and missed was just an ordinary day like I’d had and hadn’t appreciated before.

The value of my work. As a homemaker, I can sometimes feel my work is not as important as other people’s. But when I couldn’t do my work and saw the extra pressure it put on everyone else to do what I always did, it helped me realize that I did have a helpful contribution to making family life go smoothly.

The value of help. People from church brought meals, cleaned bathrooms, babysat, prayed, sent cards, and let us know they cared. A group of men installed a handrail on the stairs and safety bars in the bathroom.

People often wonder what to do to help in a crisis. It varies according to the person and the situation. But I’d encourage praying about it and then doing what the Lord lays on your heart. For instance, one lady brought over a puzzle, and she and my oldest son sat and worked it at the kitchen table while we talked. We’d had to go back and forth to so many doctor’s visits, either taking the kids with us or to babysitters, and that quiet activity was a balm. Yet if someone had asked me what I needed, I never would have thought of a puzzle and quiet conversation.

The mental cost. This is something I didn’t realize until a few years ago. I was reading of a woman who had been in a horrific accident where she was hit by a bus, flying through the air until she landed on the street with multiple broken bones. On the one year anniversary of her accident, she wrote that she had healed physically, but still suffered triggers that affected her mentally and emotionally.

That statement was like a light bulb coming on in my mind.

For maybe a year or two after TM, I suffered from panic attacks. I didn’t tell anyone. This was in an era when many Christians were adamantly against psychiatry. We had seen a documentary about the dangers of Xanax. I was afraid of being shipped off to a psychiatrist and being put on psychotic drugs.

In fact, I was given Xanax while in the hospital, but no one ever explained why. I don’t remember that it had much of an effect. But I didn’t want to continue it.

So even as I healed physically and enjoyed time with my family and getting back to church, I didn’t realize that I was still shaken up mentally and emotionally. I think part of it is that the world no longer felt secure. We know that anything can happen any time–but when it does, life doesn’t seem safe any more.

In truth, this world was never meant to be our safe place. Our shelter and security comes from God. But it takes a while to remember that, or to apply it in new ways, when our lives are severely shaken.

Mental and emotional healing may take just as much of an up-and-down trajectory as physical healing and may leave us with limps, scars, or tender places.

Things evened out over time, but I wish I had talked to my neurologist or primary care doctor.about all this while it was going on. Thankfully, we understand mental issues better now than we did then.

Lessons from limitations. I’ve written about this before, but one of the biggest lessons was that even though I couldn’t do everything I had done before, that didn’t mean I couldn’t do anything. We all face limitations of some kind–physical, financial, relational, season of life, etc. Our limits don’t hinder our ministry: they just define it.

Happy stress is still stress. A nurse shared this with Mittu when Timothy was in the NICU for 10 1/2 weeks. It rang a bell with me, too. Even with events I am dearly looking forward to, I have to pace myself.

Faith during uncertainty. For the first couple of years after TM, I never knew what my symptoms and capabilities would be any given day. I felt bad when plans with the family had to be canceled, though they were understanding. I didn’t know how long symptoms would go on or what level of recovery I would eventually reach. I was used to getting medical problems fixed, either with medication or a procedure. Living with the unknown for so long was wearing, but it caused us to rely on God moment by moment and trust Him for the future.

The joy of finding others. We got our first family personal computer about six weeks after my diagnosis, and transverse myelitis was the first thing I looked up. I found an email subscriber list of TM patients and caregivers. No one else I knew outside of the medical community had ever heard of TM. To find people who knew what I was talking about, who could answer questions and compare notes, was a godsend.

Dealing with “what ifs.” We lived in a split-level house, and I couldn’t use the stairs at first. Would we need to move? I had three sons, the youngest just two years old. Would I be able to take care of them? We had just started our second year of home schooling. Would I be able to continue? About a third of TM patients don’t regain anything they lost at onset. What if I didn’t? Or what if it got worse? What if I developed MS? What if the doctors missed something? Living with uncertainty isn’t comfortable, but God’s Word assured me He was with me and cared for me. I didn’t know what the future held, but I could trust Him to meet my needs and lead us day by day.

It’s okay to have bad days, to cry, to lament. I used to think that in order to be a good testimony, I had to project “victory” and positivity all the time. That’s not only inauthentic, it’s unrelateable. In the psalms, we see people pouring out their confusion, questions, anguish, physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual pains. Eventually they remind themselves of what they know to be true about God’s character and ways, and they rest in Him even though the circumstances may not have changed.

The comfort of Scripture. Finding help and hope in the Bible was not new to me, but God’s Word helped me in special ways during this time. For example, the night before I was scheduled for an MRI, nearly every medical person who came into my hospital room asked me if I was claustrophobic. I didn’t know–I had never been in a position to feel claustrophobic before. I wanted to tell them that their questions were making me feel claustrophobic! I was told that they could give me something to calm my nerves, but it needed to be done a certain amount of time before the MRI. I opted not to take anything.

They stressed to me the importance of being still in the MRI machine. Before the MRI, the verses from my Daily Light on the Daily Path devotional were all about being still: “Sit still, my daughter” (Ruth 3:18); “Be still, and know that I am God” (Psalm 46:10); “Commune with your own heart upon your bed, and be still” (Psalm 4:4), and others. Those words kept running through my mind while I was in the MRI machine, and I remained calm. I even dozed off.

In the following months, other verses stood out to me. “The Lord strengthen him upon the bed of languishing: thou wilt make all his bed in his sickness” (Psalm 41:3); “In all their affliction he was afflicted, and the angel of his presence saved them: in his love and in his pity he redeemed them; and he bare them, and carried them all the days of old” (Isaiah 63:9); “And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me” (2 Corinthians 12:9), “Though he cause grief, he will have compassion according to the abundance of his steadfast love; for he does not afflict from his heart or grieve the children of men” (Lamentations 3:32-33), and so many others.

How about you? What has God taught you and how has He helped you in illness?

(I often link up with some of these bloggers.)

Do You Need a Fresh Word from the Lord?

Posted on August 3, 2025 by Barbara Harper

Have you ever heard anyone say they needed a “fresh word” from the Lord?

I pondered recently what would prompt someone to say that.

Perhaps they’re bogged down in Leviticus.

Perhaps the old truths just seem . . . old.

Perhaps they haven’t felt the fervency they used to when reading the Bible.

Perhaps they have questions they can’t find the answer to in the Bible.

Perhaps they haven’t seen God move in life like He did in His Word.

It’s good to ask ourselves these questions and try to figure out where the problem is. I want to encourage us that the Bible is living, active, sharp, piercing, discerning (Hebrews 4:12).

The Bible is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness (2 Timothy 3:16).

God has granted to us all things–all things–that pertain to life and godliness, through the knowledge of him who called us to his own glory and excellence, by which he has granted to us his precious and very great promises (2 Peter 1:3-4).

All of these and other passages show that we don’t need something new and fresh from God. What He has given us is more than sufficient for our spiritual needs.

Why doesn’t it always feel that way?

Well it could be something as simple as not getting enough sleep. I know what it is to battle drowsiness all through my Bible reading and not get anything out of it. Going to bed earlier or moving devotions to later in the day might help. Doing something active before reading can help wake us up.

Distractions are a problem. I don’t know how many times I have started to pray or read and had to keep bringing my mind back from other thoughts. Sometimes I treat my thoughts like my phone and mentally swipe away all the open tabs. I pray for God’s help and then perhaps read out loud or change my position or location. I keep a notepad nearby to jot down thoughts about things I need to take care of.

Something might be blocking our communication. In any relationship, when something is wrong, our communication isn’t what it should be. If we ask God to search us and show us what is wrong, He will. We can then confess any sin and put away anything that is displeasing to Him.

What about Leviticus–what a friend referred to as the place where Bible reading plans go to die? Someone said all of the Bible is inspired but it’s not all inspiring. It helps to remind ourselves of the verses above, that this is part of God’s Word, too, and He has a purpose for it in our Bibles.

Studying some of these difficult passages with others, or using a good study aid or commentary, helps as well. They can open our eyes to things we missed in our own study.

When our ladies’ Bible study went through Hebrews, someone remarked that it would be good to study Leviticus and Hebrews together. Hebrews explains a lot of the symbolism in the Old Testament systems of worship.

Also, after reading from Leviticus or Chronicles, it might help to spend time in the psalms or in passages that have been especially meaningful to us in the past.

What about those unanswered questions? Sometimes the answers are there, but we haven’t found them yet. Asking a friend who is further along in their Christian walk or a pastor or Bible study leader can shed light.

But sometimes the answers just aren’t there. Deuteronomy 29:29 says “The secret things belong to the LORD our God, but the things that are revealed belong to us and to our children forever, that we may do all the words of this law.” God wants us to know Him well enough through the Word He has given us we can trust Him for what He hasn’t shared.

In New Testament times, people called Gnostics taught that there was a secret, special knowledge that only a few people knew. Though Gnostics are not named in the Bible, the epistles warn against their teachings. Mark Howell writes “The proclivity of many Christians is to be constantly on the lookout for some new thing to breathe life into the church. But according to Paul, the answer will not come by finding something new; it will come when the church renews its focus on something old—the Scriptures.” (Exalting Jesus in 1 & 2 Thessalonians [Christ-Centered Exposition Commentary], p. 238)

If we’re feeling bored, maybe we need to change our routine. Or we may need to pray for God to wake us again to the wonders in His Word. I love the King James word “quicken,” often translated “revive” in other versions. Many verses talk about God’s Word itself quickening us (Psalm 119:25, 50, 93; John 6:63).

We need to remember, too, that feelings aren’t always the mark of spirituality. Nothing beats those times in the Bible when God speaks to our hearts in a special way and we’re encouraged, our hearts are warmed, and we’re ready to face the day with hope and love. But just like any relationship, those warm, close times will come and go. Many of our conversations with loved ones are filled with necessary but mundane everyday details.

Every meal won’t be a Thanksgiving feast. But even the tuna casseroles and peanut butter sandwiches nourish us. Similarly, every time in the Bible won’t bring 4th of July sparks, but every reading benefits us. It’s that faithful everyday adding to and building upon what we know that strengthens us. And that in turn lays the foundation for those special, eye-opening, heart-warming moments.

We’ll always find new insights as we keep reading the Bible. But often what we need is the reminders of what we’ve learned before.

The hymn “How Firm a Foundation” begins with this stanza:

How firm a foundation, ye saints of the Lord,
Is laid for your faith in His excellent word!
What more can He say than to you He hath said,
To you who for refuge to Jesus have fled?

Dan Forrest’s arrangement of this hymn weaves that phrase from the first stanza–“What more can He say?”–between each of the other stanzas that focus on specific passages from the Bible. .

He’s already given us “all things that pertain unto life and godliness.” What more can He say?

(I often link up with some of these bloggers.)

When You’re Not Number One

Posted on July 27, 2025 by Barbara Harper

Fans of ball games across the country shout, “We’re Number One!” from the stands.

In reality, everyone can’t be number one. Someone has to be the second banana, play the second fiddle, act as the sidekick.

Many of us have the sad experience of not even being second. We were the last ones chosen for any kind of physical game.

One of the most dramatic battles for first place occurred between twins Jacob and Esau. In Old Testament times, the oldest son received the most inheritance, a blessing from his father, and the chosen leadership of the family.

Esau was the oldest. But God chose Jacob for a special blessing. Jacob would someday become Israel, head of the family through whom God blessed the world.

Did God choose Jacob to show a distinction, a way of saying “I am doing something different here” so it would stand out? Or did he choose the younger child because he knew the oldest was not fit to carry out His will? I don’t know—there may be a number of reasons.

However, instead of waiting and trusting God to work out His purposes, Jacob’s mother, Rebekah, felt they had to “help” orchestrate the circumstances by deceit, which did not work out well. Jacob got what he wanted, but he had to flee from Esau’s life-threatening anger. Esau seemed to have mellowed out a bit when Jacob returned twenty years later, but the Edomites, Esau’s descendants, were Israel’s enemies for centuries.

Jacob had twelve sons. Instead of learning from the tragedy of his family’s favoritism, he perpetuated it by having a favorite son: Joseph. Joseph’s brothers hated him and took the first opportunity to get rid of him.

There were other factors in both these cases besides the chosen status of a younger brother, factors which caused understandable anger. But they caused me to think of others in the Bible who found they were not the chosen ones.

Bad examples from the Bible

Cain was angry God accepted Abel’s offering and not his. Instead of repenting and adjusting his ways, he killed Abel.

Miriam and Aaron were jealous of Moses’ position. So were the sons of Korah. Each suffered God’s wrath.

King Saul had been chosen by God to be Israel’s first king. But his pride and disobedience led God to set Saul aside for David. Saul responded in anger, jealousy, and further sin.

Ahithophel was a counselor to David who deserted him when David’s son, Absalom, revolted against his father and staged a coup (2 Samuel 16-17). When Ahithophel’s counsel was not taken, he set his affairs in order and killed himself.

Absalom tried to take the throne by force. He was killed despite his father’s wishes.

The apostle John warned about Diotrephes, who “likes to put himself first” and did not respect the apostles’ authority.

Good examples from the Bible

Jonathan was Saul’s son, next in line to become king. But when Jonathan recognized God’s hand and calling on David, he readily acquiesced and helped David escape Saul’s wrath.

David planned to build a temple for God, but God said no. David’s son was to build the temple instead. David didn’t complain. He rejoiced that God blessed his house and did everything he could to aid Solomon.

Barnabas was instrumental in introducing Paul to other Christians when they were afraid of him. But he didn’t seem to resent when Paul became the leading spokesperson.

Andrew was Simon Peter’s brother. He faithfully served, often pointing people to Jesus. Though the disciples sometimes argued over who was the greatest, by and large they did not seem to mind that Peter was their leader.

John the Baptist was not offended when his followers left to follow Jesus. He pointed them to Him and said, “He must increase, but I must decrease.”

Examples from history

Many people are familiar with D. L. Moody, a famous evangelist in the 1800s. What’s not as well-known is that Moody was led to the Lord by a faithful Sunday School teacher, Edward Kimball.

In fact, that visit set off a series of events. Under Moody’s preaching, a man named Wilbur Chapman was saved and became an evangelist. Under Chapman’s ministry, Billy Sunday was saved and also became an evangelist. Mordecai Ham was converted under Sunday’s influence. And Ham led Billy Graham to the Lord (sources here and here).

Many people know of Jim Elliot, one of five missionaries killed in 1956 when the tribe they were trying to reach speared them to death. The news went out across the globe. Jim’s wife, Elisabeth, told the men’s story in Through Gates of Splendor. Many books and articles have been written about the five men, their wives, and the tribespeople who eventually came to know the Lord. Many lives have been touched and surrendered to the Lord because of these events.

Jim had an older brother, Bert, who was a faithful missionary in Peru for some sixty years with his wife, Colleen. Bert told Randy Alcorn, “Jim and I both served Christ, but differently. Jim was a great meteor, streaking through the sky.” Randy described Bert as “a faint star that rose night after night, faithfully crossing the same path in the sky, to God’s glory.” Both were used by God, but He led them along different paths.

Sometimes God pushes people into the limelight who didn’t want to be there at first, like Moses and Gideon. He gives grace for that, but He also gives grace for the fainter stars, the lesser-known, who faithfully serve Him with the talents He has given.

Once when someone asked Edith Schaeffer, wife of Francis Schaeffer, founder of L’Abri, who the most influential Christian woman of the day was. Edith replied something like “Whoever she is, nobody knows her. She’ll be a woman whose calling is to be behind the scenes praying.” I’ve heard variations on this answer–another source quotes her as saying, “We don’t know her name. She is dying somewhere in a cancer ward or living in India.”

Whichever way Edith worded her answer, the principle is true: we don’t know who the most influential Christians are. That’s not our business. Our business is to keep our eyes on Him and serve Him with all our hearts.

No leader or CEO or head of anything can accomplish much without support staff. Christendom is the same: “Now there are varieties of gifts, but the same Spirit; and there are varieties of service, but the same Lord; and there are varieties of activities, but it is the same God who empowers them all in everyone. To each is given the manifestation of the Spirit for the common good” (1 Corinthians 12:4-7).

Elisha was said to pour water on the hands of Elijah (2 Kings 3:11), a way of saying he ministered to Elijah’s needs. Elisha became the primary prophet after Elijah’s death, but he served just as well in whatever capacity he was called to at the time.

Imagine if one person in the chain between D. L. Moody and Billy Graham hadn’t done their part. There are unseen connections like that in all of our lives. We don’t know when a kind word, a shared verse, or a prayer might be part of a long series of steps leading a person to meet the Lord or know Him better.

May God give us grace to serve Him in whatever way He wants us to, ministering to others in large or small ways, whether seen or unseen.

“As good stewards of the manifold grace of God, each of you should use whatever gift he has received to serve one another” (1 Peter 4:10, BSB).

(I often link up with some of these bloggers.)

Does God Know You?

Posted on July 20, 2025 by Barbara Harper

Some of the scariest Bible verses to me are Matthew 7:21-23:

Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. On that day many will say to me, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and cast out demons in your name, and do many mighty works in your name?’ And then will I declare to them, ‘I never knew you; depart from me, you workers of lawlessness.

The people here were doing and saying “religious” things, even calling Jesus Lord. But He professed not to know them.

Of course, He is omniscient. He knows everything about everyone. But He doesn’t know these people in the sense of having a relationship with them.

How can this be?

Many passages talk about doing, not just hearing, the Word of God. But the reverse is true as well. It’s possible to do religious things without knowing God at all. The Pharisees were famous for knowing the Old Testament law but missing the point of it.

It’s possible to grow up in or become part of Christian culture without really knowing the Lord.

How can we know that we know Him and He knows us?

Psalm 1:6 says, “The Lord knows the way of the righteous, but the way of the wicked will perish.” That righteousness isn’t our own–we could never measure up to the perfect righteousness required. “We have all become like one who is unclean, and all our righteous deeds are like a polluted garment. We all fade like a leaf, and our iniquities, like the wind, take us away.” (Isaiah 64:6).

Philippians 1:11 speaks of the “righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ.” Only He is righteous enough. And He graciously gives His righteousness to us when we repent of our sins and believe in Him.

He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, that we might die to sin and live to righteousness. By his wounds you have been healed (1 Peter 2:24).

For our sake he made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God (2 Corinthian 5:21).

He saved us, not because of works done by us in righteousness, but according to his own mercy, by the washing of regeneration and renewal of the Holy Spirit, whom he poured out on us richly through Jesus Christ our Savior, so that being justified by his grace we might become heirs according to the hope of eternal life (Titus 3:5-7).

“The Lord knows those who are his” (2 Timothy 2:19). He’s the good shepherd who knows His sheep (John 10:14). He “knows those who take refuge in him” (Nahum 1:7).

Do you know God? Does He know you?

Please read here for more information.

(I often link up with some of these bloggers.)

When “Should” Irritates

Posted on July 13, 2025 by Barbara Harper

I am in a writing critique group where we take turns presenting a piece to the others for their feedback. Few things have impacted my writing more than having others read it and make suggestions to improve it.

With my last submission, I asked the group about what tone came across. I wanted to sound like an encouraging friend sitting across the table, not a lecturer.

Some of the ladies pointed out that I used “should” a number of times and suggested that I reword those sentences.

They were absolutely correct. Writing what people “should” do can sound like wagging my finger in their faces while frowning over my eyeglasses at them, even when that’s not how I’m thinking as I write.

For instance, instead of writing “You should read your Bible every day,” it’s more encouraging to say “Reading the Bible regularly helps us know God, His character, and His will for us.” The first sentence seems guilt-inducing (not only the “should,” but also saying “You” instead of “we”).

Those thoughts led to a rabbit trail concerning “should.” The word often grates. Buy why?

For instance, recently I bristled in response to an article which said I should read a certain author’s books. I didn’t know the author. None of his book titles interested me. Nothing I read about the author inspired me to read him. I left the site feeling irritated rather than inspired. .

“Shoulds” can seem to imply judgment. I don’t think they are always judgmental; but they feel that way. If we don’t want to do what the other person says we should, we feel guilty–even when we disagree with what they think we should do.

Also, when someone says we should do a thing, it makes them sound superior. Their way, their foods, their health practices, their books, their preferences–whatever they are recommending, they think it’s better than what we’re doing. And that makes us (or at least me) think, “Who do you think you are?” They may be sharing excellent advice, but it hits wrong.

Even if others don’t sound superior, they can seem like busybodies. An older lady at one of our churches told a young married lady she and her husband needed to get busy and have kids, and an older woman with six kids that she needed to slow down her baby production. That advice definitely crossed lines and caused hurt. But even lesser “shoulds” can do that.

Sometimes “should” affects us negatively because we just don’t like being told what to do.

Often, though, I think “should” deflates us because we’re heaped up with so many “shoulds” already that we can’t keep up with. We’re pressured by a whole list of unmet “shoulds” for family, our spiritual lives, health, friends, church, neighbors, our homes . . . we never get it all done, leaving us in an endless guilt cycle.

However, “should” is not always negative.

If I’m teaching my child to brush his teeth, I might say, “You should brush your teeth twice every day.” My dentist told me I should floss daily. “Should,” in those cases, is helpful.

Sometimes “should” is instructional. A math teacher will tell students why they should do long division or multiply fractions a certain way. A science teacher will tell students what they should and shouldn’t do in the lab, for everyone’s safety as well as their learning.

“Should” can even be a promise, or at least a hope. A financial advisor might recommend certain investments which should yield a profit.

“Should” is somewhat easier to take from an authority. We expect a parent, teacher, coach, or boss to tell us what we should do. In fact, we often welcome it. I would feel lost and frustrated in class or at a job where I had no idea what was expected of me.

“Should” also comes across better when there is a relationship behind it. I could probably handle “should” better from my husband or a good friend than from a casual acquaintance or an Internet stranger.

The Bible is full of shoulds and should nots, even when that exact word isn’t used. God is our ultimate authority. But His instructions and requirements are also based on His relationship with His own, His love for them, and His desire for their best interests.

Some of my favorite “shoulds” in the Bible:

I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you with my eye upon you (Psalm 32:8).

There is nothing better for a person than that he should eat and drink and find enjoyment in his toil. This also, I saw, is from the hand of God (Ecclesiastes 2:24).

The Lord is good to those who wait for him, to the soul who seeks him. It is good that one should wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord (Lamentations 3:25-26).

Thus it is written, that the Christ should suffer and on the third day rise from the dead, and that repentance for the forgiveness of sins should be proclaimed in his name to all nations, beginning from Jerusalem (Luke 24:46-47).

For I have given you an example, that you also should do just as I have done to you (John 15:16).

They should repent and turn to God, performing deeds in keeping with their repentance (Acts 26:20b).

One person esteems one day as better than another, while another esteems all days alike. Each one should be fully convinced in his own mind (Romans 14:5).

But all things should be done decently and in order (1 Corinthians 14:40).

Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted (Galatians 6:1).

And this is love, that we walk according to his commandments; this is the commandment, just as you have heard from the beginning, so that you should walk in it (2 John 1:6).

“Should” has its place.

In my writing, I need to be careful with “should.” It’s usually best to avoid it and reframe my sentences to sound more encouraging.

But when I read or hear “should,” I need to consider it prayerfully and take into account who is saying it and what they are saying I should do. If they are heaping more on me than I can take, imposing their own opinions, or trying to induce shame or guilt, it may be best to ignore their “shoulds.”

But if the admonition is coming from someone who knows me and cares for me, who is responsible for me, who has my best interests in mind, they might be trying to help or guide me. I should probably heed what they say.

(I often link up with some of these bloggers.)

Sharing Our Struggles, not Our Perfection

Posted on July 6, 2025 by Barbara Harper

Several years ago, our ladies’ group asked some older married women in the church to be on a panel for discussion about marriage at a ladies’ meeting. We didn’t want to put them on the spot: we just figured they had more experience, and we wanted to glean their wisdom.

However, we had the hardest time getting anyone to agree to be on the panel. Some ladies didn’t want to participate because they thought their own marriages were far from perfect. Some felt that they were still learning: rather than answering other women’s questions, they still had plenty of their own.

In hindsight, it probably would have been better not to have particular women on a panel in front of everyone. One advantage to a panel is having known and trusted people there, whereas opening questions to the crowd in general might lead to some questionable answers. But perhaps the disadvantages outweighed the advantages.

Still, the evening ended up going very well (details are here). One even said we needed a session like that once a year.

Many of us would shy away from portrayal as an expert in most areas, especially areas of Christian life. We know we fall short. We don’t want anyone looking to us for answers, because we still struggle ourselves.

But an experienced Christian is not the same as an expert Christian.

When we’re struggling in a given area–marriage, devotions, hospitality, motherhood, work environments, or life in general–we’re not drawn to those who have their act together, whose lives are perfect, who never seem to struggle.

We want to hear from people who have been in the trenches, who know how we feel, who won’t give us pat answers, who have experienced the things we have and overcome them.

Andrew Peterson writes in Adorning the Dark: Thoughts on Community, Calling, and the Mystery of Making:

“O God,” you pray, “I’m so small and the universe is so big. What can I possibly say? What can I add to this explosion of glory? My mind is slow and unsteady, my heart is twisted and tired, my hands are smudged with sin. I have nothing—nothing—to offer.

Write about that.

“What do you mean?”

Write about your smallness. Write about your sin, your heart, your inability to say anything worth saying. Watch what happens (p. 11, Kindle version).

Though Peterson was praying about song-writing here, the principle is true in any area of life.

We can’t bless others with packaged advice from a position of perfection. Even if we could, our ministrations would probably be rejected as cold and unfeeling.

But God says His power is made perfect in our weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9).

One day on a hillside, over 5,000 people came to hear Jesus teach. Jesus had compassion on their physical needs as well as their spiritual needs. He told the disciples, “You give them something to eat.”

Of course, the disciples didn’t have the means to feed so many people. Philip indicated they didn’t have enough money to buy even a little food for everyone. Andrew found a boy with five barley loaves and two fish, but then asked, “what are they for so many?”

Jesus already knew what He was going to do to provide for the people. But He wanted the disciples to realize that they could not meet the need on their own.

Jesus had the people sit down, gave thanks, and then distributed the food to the disciples, who gave it to the people. Not only did they have “as much as they wanted,” but they gathered twelve baskets of leftovers.

We don’t have the wherewithal to feed people spiritually. But when we give ourselves to Him, He can work through us to help others. He will take our not-enoughness and work through us to display His more-than-enoughness.

(I often link up with some of these bloggers.)

Irritating or Irritable?

Posted on June 29, 2025 by Barbara Harper

When one of my sons was a child, he got hold of the word “irritating” – as in, “Mo-ooom, he’s irritating me.”

We tried to teach our boys not to irritate each other on purpose, not to hit, tease, “bother,” bait, infringe on the possessions or person of the other, etc. But sometimes in everyday living together, we’re going to irritate each other.

After listening to whatever had irritated my young son, I would deal with the issue. But when the complaints of irritation grew, I would say something like, “You need to work on not being so irritate-able” (pronounced on purpose for emphasis). That was not a satisfying answer. The problem is with the other guy, Mom! You need to make him stop!

I need to heed my own advice. I find myself getting far too irritated far too often. Sometimes it’s the other thing or person that is being irritating, or causing the issue: the ~~stupid~~ recalcitrant computer, the driver who wasn’t watching what he was doing, the Alexa device that can’t handle a simple request, etc.

But too often, it’s just a matter of my own irritate-ableness. Touchiness, my mom used to call it.

Honestly, little irritations trip me up spiritually much more often than major trials.

So what can I do when I am feeling irritable?

Remember we live in a fallen world. Appliances and cars break down at the most inconvenient times. Traffic jams seem to occur when I am most in a hurry. We all have sin natures that won’t be completely eradicated until we get to heaven. I shouldn’t be surprised when things go wrong or when there are occasional misunderstandings.

Fix the issue, if possible. Find out if there is something wrong with the computer, leave early so every red light isn’t aggravating, slow down and take the necessary time to accomplish something so haste doesn’t create more problems, gently ask the other person to refrain from or change whatever they are doing,etc.

Forbear. A former pastor used to say forbearing was just good old-fashioned putting up with each other. Ephesians 4:1-3 goes a step further and speaks of “forbearing one another in love” (“bearing with” in some translations).

Humble myself. The verses mentioned speak of humility and meekness. Who am I to think that the entire world should revolve around my preferences? Colossians 3:12-14 also speaks of forbearance in the context of “kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering,” and forgiveness.

Focus on the other person. When I am fixated on an irritating behavior in someone else, I view the whole person through that lens. Instead, I need to focus on that person as another child of the Father whom He loves every bit as much as He loves me and seek ways to serve him or her.

Do unto others as I would have them do unto me. I need to remember that I’m probably unwittingly irritating someone else who is being forbearing with me. I need to handle the irritations that come from other people as graciously as I would want them to handle mine.

Don’t make excuses. There are certain times, seasons, hormones, and circumstances that make one more susceptible to irritability. I admit it is really hard for me to be civil, much less loving, when I haven’t had enough sleep. And during certain hormonal surges I’ve wondered how in the world not to blow up at someone. But God’s promises and requirements don’t have exception clauses for “those” times. He gives more grace when we ask Him and rely on Him for it.

Behold our God. II Corinthians 3:18 says we’re changed more and more into Christ’s likeness as we behold Him. When I look inside and tell myself I need to be more kind, loving, forbearing, etc., I get discouraged and fail because I don’t have it in myself (Romans 7:18). But when I look at Him, that irritability seems to just melt away.

The Lord is gracious and merciful, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love.
The Lord is good to all, and his mercy is over all that he has made (Psalm 145:8-9).

For to this you have been called, because Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example, so that you might follow in his steps. He committed no sin, neither was deceit found in his mouth. When he was reviled, he did not revile in return; when he suffered, he did not threaten, but continued entrusting himself to him who judges justly (! Peter 2:21-23).

Pray. I often pray Colossians 1:9-14 for myself and my loved ones. Verse 11 says, “Strengthened with all might, according to his glorious power, unto all patience and longsuffering with joyfulness.” We need God’s strength to be patient. Along with His power, He also gives us joy.

Trust God to work through even this. Author and missionary Elisabeth Elliot has been my “mentor from afar” for most of my adult life. She was honest about her human failings and struggles. She wrote in A Lamp for My Feet:

How can this person who so annoys or offends me be God’s messenger? Is God so unkind as to send that sort across my path? Insofar as his treatment of me requires more kindness than I can find in my own heart, demands love of a quality I do not possess, asks of me patience which only the Spirit of God can produce in me, he is God’s messenger. God sends him in order that he may send me running to God for help.

It encouraged me that Elisabeth had some of the same feelings I wrestle with.

God uses some people and circumstances as sandpaper to smooth our rough edges. Romans 5:3-5 tells us “suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.” That’s true of “little” sufferings as well as the big ones.

(Revised from the archives.)

(I often link up with some of these bloggers.)

Your Soul Needs Food Even When It Doesn’t Want It

Posted on June 22, 2025 by Barbara Harper

You’re sick. Your sinuses are inflamed, your throat is raw, your nose is red, drippy, and chafing. You have a fever and ache all over. And you don’t feel like eating.

But you do eat. Nothing sounds good, except maybe the proverbial remedy for a cold, chicken soup. But you eat because your body needs it. And the very food you don’t have an appetite for not only nourishes you, but helps your body fight infection and get well.

The same is true spiritually. When something is wrong in our lives, when we’re in some kind of dark valley—we tend to put God’s Word aside. Our appetite for it has waned.

But we need the Bible then more than ever. We may not be able to keep up with our usual routine or an intense study. But we need to keep sipping and tasting. We might spend more time in the Psalms or favorite passages than other passages. We might listen instead of read.

And the very Word we don’t have an appetite for not only nourishes us, but helps us heal. It will strengthen us and help us fight spiritual infection.

So when our appetite for the Word of God is off, we need to keep partaking. Our souls need it. We may not feel instant refreshment. It may seem a little dry. But we can ask God to open “the eyes of our heart” and minister to us.

Often a subdued appetite can be aroused by tasting food. It didn’t sound good, but once we had a few bites, we wanted more.

We may feel like reading the Bible is the last thing we want to do. But it’s been my experience, many times over, that once I start reading it, I want more.

Incline my heart to your testimonies, and not to selfish gain! Turn my eyes from looking at worthless things; and give me life in your ways (Psalm 119:36-37).

They loathed any kind of food,
    and they drew near to the gates of death.
Then they cried to the Lord in their trouble,
    and he delivered them from their distress.
He sent out his word and healed them,
    and delivered them from their destruction.
Let them thank the Lord for his steadfast love,
    for his wondrous works to the children of man!
And let them offer sacrifices of thanksgiving,
    and tell of his deeds in songs of joy!

(Psalm 107:18-22)