Book Review: Living with Purpose in a Worn-out Body: Spiritual Encouragement for Older Adults

When I saw Mocha With Linda mention Living with Purpose in a Worn-out Body: Spiritual Encouragement for Older Adults by Missy Buchanan, I knew I had to get it for my mother-in-law and myself. Missy was a daily caregiver to her mother, who lived to be 92, and now Missy spends much time visiting with other residents in the senior residence center where her mother spent her last days. Her experiences make the  devotionals she began writing for senior adults ring with authenticity.

This book covers several areas: pain, loneliness, feeling forgotten, the treasure of friends, sleep, purpose, clutter, medicine, bingo, laughter, sensible shoes — many aspects of an older person’s life. The devotionals address these issues in a genuine way. Some are poignant, some are fun, but all bring the reader back to focus on God in every issue. Here is a sample:

Sometimes I wonder why you have left me on this earth.
Ia have outlived so many family and friends. Why do I linger?
What purpose could you have for me now?
Look at my hands. Once strong and sure, they are unsteady and frail.
My mind, once quick and incisive, now falters under the weight of names and faces.
What real purpose do I serve knitting away the hours, surfing the channels, dozing through the afternoon?
Then Your Spirit stirs my heart and convicts my soul.
You are not a wasteful God!
The length of my earthly days is a mystery to me, but one thing I know for sure. You have created me with an eternal purpose.
How can I be more like Christ today?
Whose life can I touch with kindness?
Lord, give me an extra measure of grace when I feel that I’m too old to be useful.
Help me as I take my limitations in stride as I search for opportunities to serve you.
My purpose has not withered away with another birthday.
It is rooted in eternity.

Psalm 33:11:
But the plans of the LORD stand firm forever,
the purposes of his heart through all generations.

The text in the book is large print, yet the book as a whole is slim.

I would highly, highly recommend this to any “senior saint” you know as well as family members and caregivers.

(This review will also be linked to Semicolon‘s Saturday Review of Books.)

Awake, my soul, and with the sun

Folly Beach sunrise

(Photo taken by my husband at Folly Beach in Charleston, SC)

Most of us are very familiar with the last stanza of this, the Doxology, but the rest is quite rich as well:

Awake, my soul, and with the sun
Thy daily stage of duty run;
Shake off dull sloth, and joyful rise,
To pay thy morning sacrifice.

Thy precious time misspent, redeem,
Each present day thy last esteem,
Improve thy talent with due care;
For the great day thyself prepare.

By influence of the Light divine
Let thy own light to others shine.
Reflect all Heaven’s propitious ways
In ardent love, and cheerful praise.

In conversation be sincere;
Keep conscience as the noontide clear;
Think how all seeing God thy ways
And all thy secret thoughts surveys.

All praise to Thee, who safe has kept
And hast refreshed me while I slept
Grant, Lord, when I from death shall wake
I may of endless light partake.

Heav’n is, dear Lord, where’er Thou art,
O never then from me depart;
For to my soul ’tis hell to be
But for one moment void of Thee.

Lord, I my vows to Thee renew;
Disperse my sins as morning dew.
Guard my first springs of thought and will,
And with Thyself my spirit fill.

Direct, control, suggest, this day,
All I design, or do, or say,
That all my powers, with all their might,
In Thy sole glory may unite.

Praise God, from Whom all blessings flow;
Praise Him, all creatures here below;
Praise Him above, ye heavenly host;
Praise Father, Son, and Holy Ghost.

~ Thomas Ken, Man­u­al of Pray­ers for the Use of the Schol­ars of Win­ches­ter Col­lege, 1674.

(A bit of interesting background information on this hymn can be found here.)

Book Review: 50 People Every Christian Should Know

In the preface to 50 People Every Christian Should Know: Learning From Spiritual Giants of the Faith, author Warren Wiersbe states that he has been greatly helped by reading biographies. “The past is not an anchor to drag us back but a rudder to help guide us into the future.” I love to read biographies as well, and this book included some that were new to me.

I didn’t realize until I received the book that it was compiled from two former books by Wiersbe, Living With the Giants and Victorious Christians You Should Know, which in turn were originally columns in the magazines Moody Monthly and The Good News Broadcaster, which are no longer being published. I am glad these testimonies have been preserved in this book.

Of the 50 (51, actually: one chapter combines two men), I had previously read biographies of six; I knew something about or had read books by about fifteen others, and the rest were new to me except for just a few whose names I had heard. There are four women, a few missionaries, but most are preachers.

Wiersbe gives a brief history of each person as well as suggestions for books by that person or other biographies of them for further reading. Some of the chapters were a little drier to me than others, but often that occurred when I was trying to read too many of them at one time. The stories I already knew were a good refresher, and some of the others were a good springboard toward finding new biographies to read. Though most of the time Wiersbe tried to convey what the person was like rather than just what they did, there were a couple of chapters where I didn’t get that sense of personality. I did appreciate that the individuals were listed in chronological order, so that we could see the effect of the issues of the day or other people on each person.

A couple of the inclusions confused me, though, as Wiersbe said they “did not preach the atonement”: one, in fact, went from a grace-based faith to a works-based religion. I don’t see how such persons could be considered “giants of the faith,” though Wiersbe did say there were things he learned from them.

One of the overall lessons this books left with me was that God can use anybody. These 51 agreed on most core, fundamental doctrines yet were from various denominations, from opposite sides of the Calvinist/Arminian and other controversies, from differing viewpoints on end times and how ministry should be conducted, from widely different personalities and academic tendencies. and yet God used each one. Does that mean none of those issues matters? No, each individual is responsible to  study the issue, the Bible, and in their own conscience before God determine what they believe and how to live it out. But seeing how God used varieties of people helps me to be a little less critical, though I trust no less analytical. We can even learn from the fact that some were gifted in one area but had faults in others, as we are all in the same state.

I marked more passages and quotes than I can possibly share in one post…

But here are a few that stood out to me:

Often, after hearing his father preach, Matthew [Henry] would hurry to his room and pray that God would seal the Word and the spiritual impressions made to his heart so that he might not lose them (p. 25).

An excellent exercise. Perhaps that’s part of what made him the commentator he was.

No place is like my study. No company like good books, especially the book of God. ~ Matthew Henry (p. 27).

My endeavor is to bring out of Scripture what is there and not to trust in what I think might be there ~ Charles Simeon (p. 49.)

Amen. Would that all preachers would so do.

“Tried this morning specially to pray against idols in the shape of my books and studies. These encroach upon my direct communion with God, and need to be watched” ~ Andrew Bonar (p. 77).

Books and studies are helpful but even they can take the wrong place in our hearts and minds.

“I can see a man cannot be a faithful minister, until he preaches Christ for Christ’s sake, until he gives up striving to attract people to himself, and seeks only to attract them to Christ” ~ Robert Murray McCheyne (p. 82).

“To efface one’s self is one of a preacher’s first duties. The herald should be lost in the message” ~Alexander Maclaren (p. 109)

Surprisingly, Maclaren was haunted all his life by a sense of failure. Often he suffered ‘stage fright’ before a service, but in the pulpit he was perfectly controlled. He sometimes spoke of each Sunday’s demands as ‘a woe,’ and he was certain that his sermon was not good enough and that the meeting would be a failure” (p. 109).

Though I am not a preacher, I can identify with those feelings. In fact, I have felt that maybe they were an indication I should not be in the ministries I was in, but I guess that’s not always the case. Similarly, John Henry Jowett wrote of his Yale lectures, which I have heard reference to as a great help by more than one preacher:

The lectures are a nightmare to me, and I am glad of getting rid of them this week! (p. 284).

And later,

Preaching that costs nothing accomplishes nothing (p. 284).

We could say that is true of much service, not just preaching. What the Lord uses in our lives may not always be the incidents where we “feel” spiritual or feel like we’re accomplishing something for Him. This next quote is a help:

“All God’s giants have been weak men, who did great things for God because they reckoned on His being with them” ~ J. Hudson Taylor (p. 133).

“Don’t go about the world with your fist doubled up, carrying a theological revolver in the leg of your trousers.” ~ Charles Spurgeon (p. 143).

I’m smiling because this reminds me of my friend from yesterday’s post. On the other hand,

[Alexander] Whyte was so much of an encourager that he forgot that Christians cannot accept every doctrine men preach, though the men may be fine people (p. 169).

“Fathers and brethren,” Whyte cried, “the world of mind does not stand still! And the theological mind will stand still at its peril.” True. but the theological mind must still depend on the inspired Word of God for truth and direction. Once we lose that anchor, we drift (p. 169).

Religious sentiment, if it is worth anything, must be preceded by religious perception. ~ George Matheson on devotional writing (p. 200).

It is urgently needful that the Christian people of our charge should come to understand that they are not a company of invalids, to be wheeled about, or fed by hand, cosseted, nursed, and comforted, the minister being head physician and nurse — but a garrison in an enemy’s country, every soul of which should have some post of duty, at which he should be prepared to make any sacrifice rather than quit it. ~ F. B. Meyer (p. 216).

“Passion does not compensate for ignorance. ” ~ Samuel Chadwick (p. 249).

“We cannot make up for failure in our devotional life by redoubling energy in service.” ~ W. H. Griffith Thomas (p. 264).

“The Bible never yield itself to indolence.” G. Campbell Morgan (p. 278).

“The ‘soul-saving passion’ as an aim must cease and merge into the passion for Christ, revealing itself in holiness in all human relationships” [Oswald Chambers]. In other words, soul winning is not something we do, it is something we are…and we live for souls because we love Christ (pp. 324-325).

The applause of the crowd is not always the approval of the Lord (p. 370).

Christian leaders must realize that if they suffer from shallowness, the malady will spread throughout their entire organization (p. 370).

When a friend told William Whiting Borden that he was “throwing his life away as a missionary,” William calmly replied, “You have never seen heathenism” (p. 342).

Of Borden, who died at the age of 26 after just starting on the mission field:

Why should such a gifted life be cut short?…”A life abandoned to Christ cannot be cut short” ~ Sherwood Day (p. 345).

I think what he means is that that was what God appointed for him — that amount of time, that mission — and he fulfilled it well and God used him — and still does.

There is a very sweet poem written by Francis Ridley Havergal to Fanny Crosby — I don’t think I had realized they were contemporaries:

Dear blind sister over the sea
An English heart goes forth to thee.
We are linked by a cable of faith and song,
Flashing bright sympathy swift along;
One in the East and one in the West,
Singing for Him whom our souls love best,
“Singing for Jesus,” telling His love,
All the way to our home above.
Where the severing sea, with its restless tide,
Never shall hinder, and never divide.
Sister! what will our meeting be,
When our hearts shall sing and our eyes shall see!

The whole poem/hymn is here.

There were some amusing things in the “My how times have changed” department: D. L. Moody “felt that the bicycle, because of its popularity, was the greatest enemy of the Sabbath” (p. 291). I wonder, 100 years from now, what things people will shake their heads at in wonder that we thought “worldly.”

I imagine some of you who read here regularly will be glad to see this one done — it’s been appearing on my Nightstand posts for months. 🙂 It was neither hard nor tedious to read: it’s just best read a bit at a time rather than plowing straight through. With 50 chapters you could easily take one a week and finish it in a year — or one a day and finish it in a couple of months. Either of those or something between would give you a rich variety of people to learn from.

Though there were some names missing I would have liked to have seen here — Jim Elliot, Jonathan and Rosalind Goforth, J. O. Fraser, Henry Ward Beecher, Martyn-Lloyd Jones (he is referred to a few times), J. Oswald Sanders, Isobel Kuhn — I do understand that every author and book has its limits. 🙂 Overall I enjoyed the book very much.

I’ll close with something William Borden wrote in his notebook in college, something that many of these would echo:

“Lord Jesus, I take hands off, as far as my life is concerned. I put Thee on the throne in my heart. Change, cleanse, use me as Thou shalt choose. I take the full power of Thy Holy Spirit. I thank Thee.” Then he added this revealing sentence: “May never know a tithe of the result until Morning” (p. 345).

(This review will also be linked to Semicolon‘s Saturday review of books.)

Where is the grace?

My husband and I are not football fans, so we didn’t watch the Super Bowl. I only vaguely knew who was playing just from hearing it discussed by others. But a couple of events related to the Super Bowl have saddened and frustrated me this week.

One had to do with this commercial. It was rejected from being played during the Super Bowl, but news of its rejection spread around the Internet.

I’m not surprised that it was rejected, though it does make me sad that beer commercials and suggestive music are okay while the merest mention of a Bible verse is not.

But what particularly bothered me was one friend’s reaction to the web site the commercial referred to. He complained publicly about it, saying it didn’t emphasize sin and repentance.

Now, I know where he is coming from, and I do agree that a watered-down gospel that glosses over sin saves no one. If people don’t realize they are sinners, they don’t understand their need for salvation. And a quick, “You agree nobody’s perfect, right?” is hardly repentance. I think the shallowness that many lament in some aspects of modern Christianity stems from this lack of depth in understanding true sin and its offense to a holy God.

On the other hand, this site does mention wrongs done to God and man and the need for justice and the problem that creates for all of us who have done wrong. It doesn’t use the word “sin,” but it conveys the essence of it. The commercial is obviously aimed at people who don’t know anything about what John 3:16 is, much less what it means, and who may not even be familar with the word “sin” in a Biblical sense. The site is a very basic introductory explanation ending with an invitation to read the gospel of John. And, as my husband said, that can’t be a bad thing!

Look at the way Christ dealt with the woman at the well. He never mentioned the word “sin,” but He did put His finger on exactly her particular problem. And even then he didn’t bash her over the head with it. There were other times He did speak of sin directly, of course. There were other times He was harsher in His approach, particularly with the Pharisees who were familiar with the word of God and should have known better.

Jude says, “And of some have compassion, making a difference: And others save with fear, pulling them out of the fire; hating even the garment spotted by the flesh.” Every presentation of the gospel does not have to be a fiery showdown a la Elijah on Mt. Carmel. There are times that kind of stand needs to be taken, but there are other times a gentle compassionate approach is needed. Walking closely with the Lord and being filled with and led by His Spirit will enable us to have the right approach at the right time, for only God knows what a particular person needs at a particular time.

And at least these people are doing something to try to get people to God’s word to find out more, which is more than many of us can say.

Paul said, “Notwithstanding, every way, whether in pretence, or in truth, Christ is preached; and I therein do rejoice, yea, and will rejoice.” I choose to rejoice, as well, that the gospel was introduced to many and pray they will be led to fuller understanding and true salvation.

The other incident that frustrated me was the reaction Christina Aguilera’s flubbing the National Anthem. Now, let me be quick to say I am not a fan of much pop music and I would not let my children listen to sexually suggestive music. I was flipping through TV stations one day and saw a bit of one of her music videos. I had heard the name and watched a few moments to see what she was all about — and was stunned that so many parents would let their kids watch something so overtly sexual. On the other hand, I don’t think attacking her as if she subversively messed up a couple of lines of the “Star-Spangled Banner” on purpose is justified. I want to say to these people, “Have YOU ever sung or spoken in front of people and flubbed the words?!” Where is the grace, people? Though defending the National anthem is not in itself a Christian issue, and though other people besides Christians have attacked her, I think Christian people should be the most gracious of all. If we were to have run into her personally after the game, assuming any of us could get close to her, which would probably be impossible, but, still, if we could talk to her, a hand on the shoulder and a compassionate, “Oh, I’m so sorry that happened to you. I’m sure I would do far worse if I were trying to sing in front of so many people” would be more likely to open a door of further conversation and possible witness than lambasting her, don’t you think?

Let’s “Walk in wisdom toward them that are without, redeeming the time. Let your speech be always with grace, seasoned with salt, that ye may know how ye ought to answer every man” (Colossians 4:5-6).

Testimonies at Marriage Monday

 

E-Mom at Chrysalis hosts a Marriage Monday every month and this month the topic is our testimonies.  I wrote mine previously here and invite you there to read further.

The Week In Words

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Welcome to The Week In Words, where we share quotes from the last week’s reading. If something you read this past week  inspired you, caused you to laugh, cry, think, dream, or just resonated with you in some way, please share it with us, attributing it to its source, which can be a book, newspaper, blog, Facebook — anything that you read. More information is here.

I am in a real quandary this week. I have collected about 13 quotes since last time — way too many for one post! It’s hard to choose which ones to share, but I’ll save the rest for a week when I haven’t found quite as many.

I saw this on Lisa‘s sidebar and it really hit me right between the eyes:

Only awe of God has the power to decimate your bondage to awe of you. ~ Paul Tripp’s Twitter.

Self so insidiously permeates thoughts, deeds, and motives. But as I turn my eyes to God, the power of self decreases.

This was also on Lisa‘s sidebar:

Of course you’re not up to the task, that’s why you’ve been given the presence, promises and provisions of Jesus. ~ Paul Tripp’s Twitter.

From a friend’s Facebook:

The most deadly appetites are not for the poison of evil, but for the simple pleasures of earth. For when these replace an appetite for God himself, the idolatry is scarcely recognizable, and almost incurable. ~ John Piper

This is from the post What If I Am Not a Gifted Evangelist? (HT to Challies) on the offense of the gospel:

Remember when Paul shared the gospel he didn’t merely receive public scorn, he regularly got put in jail. And it was from jail that Paul asked for prayer that he would be bold with the gospel. If people are offended by the message of the gospel it may be awkward, but awkward truth is better than silence.

From a  church web site:

“Though faith sometimes has a trembling hand, it must not have a withered hand–it must stretch.” ~ Thomas Watson

Probably ought to leave it at that for now, as that’s plenty to try to digest for a while.

If you’ve read anything that particularly spoke to you that you’d like to share, please either list it in the comments below or write a post on your blog and then put the link to that post (not your general blog link) in Mr. Linky below. I do ask that only family-friendly quotes be included. I hope you’ll visit some of the other participants as well and glean some great thoughts to ponder.

And please — feel free to comment even if you don’t have quotes to share!

O Great God

This is a song from the Steve Pettit team‘s CD So High the Price that really speaks to me. Apparently it is based on a prayer from the Valley of Vision collection of Puritan Prayers. You can hear a bit of it by going here and clicking on “O Great God.”

O Great God

O great God of highest heaven
Occupy my lowly heart
Own it all and reign supreme
Conquer every rebel power
Let no vice or sin remain
That resists Your holy war
You have loved and purchased me
Make me Yours forevermore

I was blinded by my sin
Had no ears to hear Your voice
Did not know Your love within
Had no taste for heaven’s joys
Then Your Spirit gave me life
Opened up Your Word to me
Through the gospel of Your Son
Gave me endless hope and peace

Help me now to live a life
That’s dependent on Your grace
Keep my heart and guard my soul
From the evils that I face
You are worthy to be praised
With my every thought and deed
O great God of highest heaven
Glorify Your Name through me

~ Words and Music by Bob Kauflin

Laudable Linkage and Videos

It’s been a while since I’ve done this, but here are some things around the Web that I’ve found interesting — perhaps some will interest you as well.

Mercy in a Dustpan about practical ways of ministering to others in a crisis.

What If I’m Not a Gifted Evangelist? HT to Challies.

Someday Is a Liar and a Thief, good thoughts on not waiting to offer hospitality as a single person, but applicable to all of us who hope to be more hospitable “someday.”

The Vanity of Loveless Prophets.

Writing:

Novel Editing Tips.

A Showcase of Inspirational Writing Quotes.

Craftiness:

DIY Sweater Pillows, HT to Lizzie. I have an old sweater coming apart at the seams and sleeves, but the design is beautiful, and this would be a great way to preserve it.

DIY Photos on Canvas, HT to Lizzie again.

16 Crafty Bulletin and Memo Board Tutorials.

Kid’s Classroom Valentines. Cute, simple ideas for giving a different kind of Valentine.

I wouldn’t want things really to happen this way — because I’d be on the receiving end sometimes, I’m afraid — but it is funny.

And this is why I am glad I don’t live up North!

Have a great Saturday! I’m not sure yet what our plans are. If hubby doesn’t have any, I think I’m just going to putter around getting a few things done here and there. Love those kinds of days!

Booking Through Thursday: Real Life

btt  button Booking Through Thursday is a weekly meme which poses a question or a thought for participants to discuss centering on the subject of books or reading. The question for this week is one that I submitted:

I am paraphrasing from a friend’s Facebook wall her question:

“How would a teen-age boy who is going to work with his hands ever use Literature of England in his work?”

The age-old “How am I going to use this in real life?” question. How would you answer it?

As a wanna-be English major (I minored in English) who has always loved reading, I can’t help but think, “How can you not want to study literature, just for the enjoyment?” But obviously someone wasn’t enjoying it (interesting the question was asked by a mom rather than a child. She may have been looking for reasons to share with him, but I think she was just frustrated herself). And, honestly, not all literature is enjoyable. Some answers to the question, “Why read anything?” would apply, but why read literature in particular if you’re not going to be an English teacher? I am very interested in other people’s answers to this question, but here are a few that came to my own mind:

1. For personal enjoyment. Obviously no one will enjoy every piece of literature and some will enjoy it more than others and some teachers wring the life out of it in the way they teach it, but surely there would be portions of it that would appeal to anyone.

2. To broaden one’s horizons beyond one’s own experience, to learn of other places, times, cultures.

3. To broaden one’s understanding of one’s own culture.

4. To understand cultural references so that when someone quotes Dickens or Frost or Shakespeare you have some idea who they’re talking about. If someone mentions “Two roads diverged….,” knowing the poem and its subject enriches your understanding of what the person is referring to.

5. To have a point of contact with one’s fellow man or woman. This particular mom is a missionary and felt that her son’s time and mental powers would be better employed just reading and studying the Bible. But even the apostle Paul quoted poets and took time to understand other people’s culture as a way understanding them as a people and having a point of reference from which to share the gospel (Titus 1:11-13, Acts 17:21-23).

6. To become a more well-rounded person. Few people have just one interest, and if they don’t, they can tend to come across as a little dull to others who don’t share that interest. I’ve always been so glad that my alma mater was a Christian liberal arts university which taught a Christian worldview of all the arts.

7. To become more creative.

8. Exercise in thinking about issues, points of view, behavior, etc.

9. Exercise in language use. Someone who might be having trouble with grammar or spelling or general language use can get a feel for it almost unconsciously by reading.

What are your thoughts? What are the benefits of studying literature?

The Dinner Party That Wasn’t

Our new church has a “Dinner For Six” program which I’ve mentioned before: people who want to participate sign up and the coordinators divide everyone into groups of three couples. Each couple hosts dinner for the other two once during a three-month period , with everyone dividing up the meal each time. The host family provides main course, one family brings salad and bread, the other brings dessert and a beverage, and they rotate with each meal. It’s a really neat way to get to know people beyond just chatting after services and to meet people from other Sunday School classes or the other side of the church.

We had our first dinner back in October with our pastor’s family and another couple. The second couple was supposed to host in November, but the wife’s mother became ill and she spent much of the month in the hospital with her or at her home afterward. Not only was there not an opportune time, but they were just under too much pressure. Throughout December we tried to find a time that would work for everyone, but we just never could get together. The new rotations for the Dinner For Six were to begin in January, but we attempted to get our last group together one last time and arranged to do so at our home this past Saturday.

Hospitality is not my strong suit, but I’ve come a long way, by God’s grace, since early married years when I felt I had to spring clean every nook and cranny, get every house project on the docket done, and then make some elaborate new dish when company came. It was nice to have only the main dish to prepare, and I put together a tried-and-true crock pot meal that serves a crowd. I planned a side dish “just in case.” I’m more on top of regular housekeeping than I used to be, but there was plenty to do (you can’t clean too far ahead, because then you’d have to do it all over again before the event). I learned a long time ago that I’ll probably not get everything done I’d like to and to prioritize what things had to get done vs. other things I could then get to if I had time. I was a little dismayed at not having help: Mittu was sick and Jason was ministering to her, and Jesse had an basketball game two hours away which Jim attended. I felt bad about not going, but I didn’t feel I could handle being in the car so much before having people over even if I’d gotten everything done ahead of time. Plus I felt I should be here in case something happened to delay them. So I actually looked forward to putting on some music and digging in.

Everything came together fairly well. But then a couple of hours before dinner time I got word that the pastor’s wife and daughter were sick and that he would be coming alone with their part of the meal. I was disappointed that his wife couldn’t make it and felt bad that she was sick.

The pastor arrived at 6, but the other couple was nowhere to be seen. We thought perhaps they had mistaken the time, so we waited until about 6:30, then decided we should call them. Not only had they forgotten all about it, but their refrigerator had broken down and they were right in the midst of cleaning everything out of it and putting a new one in. Even though we had enough food for them to go ahead and come without bringing their portion, it just was not a good time for them. If I had been thinking we could have offered to take dinner to them, but that just didn’t come to mind.

We enjoyed the time with the pastor, but I couldn’t even really enjoy feeling a little like the Shunammite woman who helped feed the man of God because I felt that, instead of ministering to someone who was out and about and needing refreshment, I was taking him away from his sick family who would rather have him home. And though the conversation around the table was pleasant, even fun, after everything was over, I felt profoundly disappointed.

Disappointed? Why?

Because I felt like I had gone to all that work for nothing.

Nothing? No, not if everything is done as unto the Lord. Hospitality does not depend on the number ministered to, and even if only my own family had shown up, are they not worthy of hospitality as well? I do cook and clean for them regularly, of course, and we have an occasional special night with tablecloth, special foods, etc. — this could have been a special celebration “just because.”

Because I wanted my new friends to see my home.

Ah, there is the crux of it. No, it’s not like we live in a mansion and I wanted to offer a museum tour. I enjoy visiting other people’s homes and seeing what other people have on their walls, how they arrange things, what they collect, what colors they like, etc. –it helps me get to know them better and see their personality reflected in their home. And I wanted them to get to know me in the same way. I don’t think that’s necessarily wrong. But hospitality is not about me. It’s not supposed to be, anyway. It’s supposed to be centered on ministering to others.

As I worked through my disappointments, I looked for several good things from the experience:

  • The house was all clean, earning me a bit of rest and time to do other things for a few days.
  • I got a few more decorating projects completed.
  • There was enough food left over to provide for Sunday dinner, making an easy meal of just warming things up.
  • I could rejoice in having a calm, productive day rather than whipping myself and my family into a frenzy as has happened previously when company was coming.
  • We got to spend time with the pastor and ask some questions we had.

And in church the next day, hearing some of the burdens and prayer requests and even victories as one new precious soul came to the Lord, I was reminded that there are much bigger things going on in the world than my little dinner, and I need to get over myself. 🙂

If you’re still reading, thanks for listening to my rambling as I tried to work out my thoughts and perspectives. 🙂