Laudable Linkage

It’s been a while since I shared with you some of the interesting things I’ve seen around the Internet lately. I keep thinking I need to do this more often so as to have a shorter list. I enjoy these kinds of posts on others’ sites, though of course I don’t click on every link. I don’t expect anyone to do that here, either, but I just wanted to share some good things you may not have seen.

Nancy Wilson’s post on taking offense was convicting. We often focus on not giving offense, and we need to do that, but sometimes we take offense too easily. I Corinthians 13:5 says love “is not easily provoked.” There are Biblical ways of dealing with a legitimate offense, but I know I can all too easily take offense where none was meant.

David Hosaflook at MissioMishMash shared some great thoughts in Let the Singles Singly Serve concerning awkward things we sometimes say to single people. I asked and received his permission to share this in our ladies’ ministry newsletter booklet, and my oldest son, who normally only reads the funny section, saw this and thanked me for it. One quote:

Married folks, don’t look at the singles like the undergrads of the church, just hoping that they will “graduate” to marriage. Don’t treat them as if there’s something “incomplete” about them. If they continually get that impression at church, how will they ever learn that we are complete in Christ? How will they ever not appear “desperate” to would-be suitors who are not “in” to the desperate type?

Challies has had a series going on Sexual Detox. All of the posts are good, but if you can only read one, read A Theology of Sex.

I think the rest of these I am just going to list instead of saying, “So-and-so had a great post…” Obviously I think they are all great or else I wouldn’t be listing them. 🙂

The Heart of Her Husband Safely Trusts in Her, HT to Melissa.

Studying Love.

Looking For That Secret Recipe for perfect parenting.

Help! Mommydom leaves me no time for God.

I don’t remember where I first found a link to the ElderCare site, but I’ve been encouraged and helped by much there since I discovered it. Two articles especially helpful were Caregivers Listen Up about how to listen to people with dementia and Straight talk about sibling help.

Jesus is NOT nicer than the Father.

Procrastination in housework.

The ten commandments of entertaining.

On the craft front:

A really cute way to embellish hand towels.

Armrest pincushion.

Floral brooch tutorial.

Lace jewelry frames.

Stencil masking technique.

Hope you have a good Saturday!

Saturday Photo Scavenger Hunt: Music

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Theme: Music | Become a Photo Hunter

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I had a lot of options this week, but I chose this one from last year’s “Dickens of a Christmas” celebration downtown. One feature is different groups of musicians and singers up and down the street. This brass group was one of our favorites.

We’re looking forward to this year’s event in a few weeks. (Can it be just a few weeks until December??!!)

The Saturday Photo Scavenger Hunt is hosted by TN Chick. You can visit her place for links  to more interpretations of this theme or to join in the fun.

Friday’s Fave Five

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Susanne at Living to Tell the Story hosts a “Friday Fave Five” in which we share our five favorite things from the past week. Click on the button to read more of the details, and you can visit Susanne to see the list of others’ favorites or to join in.

1. My husband has done several nice things for me lately. He cleaned the bathrooms recently (without being asked, without my even commenting that they needed to be done), and any time he drives my car (actually, the van is the family car, but I use it most for grocery-shopping, taxiing, etc.), if the gas tank is low, he fills it up. When I thought we were doing one thing for dinner Sunday afternoon but then decided not to, my husband offered to get the things to grill hamburgers. I hadn’t been planning to cook since I thought we were attending something else, and I had a plan B, but it was nice not to have to change gears. Any time he grills is great!!

2. Making cinnamon toast out of the leftover hamburger buns. One of my favorite uses of them!

3. Absorpine, Jr., Icy Hot patches, and ibuprofen. I’ve had some kind of kink or knot in my upper back and shoulder for several days, and I am glad to have things to relieve it, but I hope it goes away completely. It has faded some.

4. Sleep. I don’t know why, but I seem to have needed to sleep a lot in the last day or so. Maybe it is a result of being out several nights this week for our missions conference — maybe because I have a bit of a sore throat and might be fighting off something. I don’t know.

5. A short and successful mall shopping trip. I needed a couple of plain white long-sleeved knit shirts: I wear them under jumpers and other things, and both of mine somehow developed holes in the elbows. I really thought I’d be hitting all the stores and end up having to order them online anyway, but I really needed them now. I found one right off the bat at the first store I tried, and also found a sweater for me and for my mother-in-law — I had been looking for a “spare” for her as she almost always wears a sweater and needed a spare for when hers was dirty. I hadn’t been able to find just simple cardigan sweaters til then. Then I found another white shirt and a pink shirt at the second store.

***Not a favorite, but a prayer request, if you feel so led. There is a family I don’t know personally, friends of a friend, who have a baby boy who has really been through the mill. I think he is only about a year old, but he has had a heart transplant and a host of other problems. It has been a roller coaster ride emotionally and physically. Right now he is in the hospital fighting for his life with an infection in his lungs called PCP (Pneumocystis pneumonia). It’s something some people can weather with no problems, but in his condition it is quite serious. He has been down for the count and spared so many times: the family is hoping for yet another miracle. His name is Gaberiel.

Engagement

I made a passing reference to my engagement in Wednesday’s Random Dozen post, and Carrie said she’d like to hear my engagement story. I thought for sure I had told about it somewhere on my blog before, but the closest I came was a mention in my love story post from three years ago. I thought about saving this for our anniversary in December, but it is a milestone anniversary (30 years!) and I have other plans for that post! And the anniversary of our engagement isn’t until May, and I don’t want to wait that long.

So, as I mentioned in our love story, it took me a long time to determine Jim was “the one.” Part of that was because it takes me a long time to come to most decisions, especially major ones, but also because I had been engaged before and didn’t see the problems in that relationship until I had been out of it for awhile. How could I be sure this time?

Coming to that determination is told in the other post, but I don’t remember if I specifically told Jim, “OK, I’m ready now,” or if he just sensed it, or, as happens often with long-dating couples, little sentences like, “If we get married…” become “When we get married…”

But we had been dating about a year and a half while attending college. The end of the school year came, and Jim offered to drive me to the airport — I was from Texas, he was from Idaho, and we were in college in South Carolina. We wouldn’t see each other until the end of summer, when he planned to come and visit and meet my family before we headed back to school. I had a feeling he might ask me when he came to visit.

But in the mean time he suggested we stop off for a picnic lunch at a nearby state park (Paris Mountain State Park, for those familiar with the area) before going to the airport. He checked to make sure it was okay: most Christian colleges have rules about dating couples not going off campus alone lest they be tempted to engage in any hanky-panky. The person he asked said it was fine: we found out later that that person might not have know what they were talking about, but we went in good faith that we were doing right.

We got chicken from somewhere, drove into the park, and set up at a picnic table. I noticed Jim wasn’t eating much, but I didn’t suspect anything. He suggested we take a walk off the main clearing. We came to a fallen tree and found it sturdy enough, so we sat on it and chatted for a while. Then he asked me to marry him. I don’t remember the exact words — I do think he got down on one knee. But my answer was, “Yes!”

And then when my mom picked me up at the airport in Texas, I had a surprise for her! I showed her my engagement ring right off the bat. I think she suspected things were heading that way. She was excited.

Jim did come to visit and meet the family that August. I had done preliminary wedding planning through the summer, and we finalized some things that week, then headed for school, where I student taught that semester. Then we got married in December.

I’d love to hear your engagement stories if you’d like to share.

Booking Through Thursday: When to give up

btt button The Booking Through Thursday for today is:

Suggested by JM:

“Life is too short to read bad books.” I’d always heard that, but I still read books through until the end no matter how bad they were because I had this sense of obligation.

That is, until this week when I tried (really tried) to read a book that is utterly boring and unrealistic. I had to stop reading.

Do you read everything all the way through or do you feel life really is too short to read bad books?

Years ago I had a problem with self-discipline in reading, starting them only to abandon them, so I began to make myself finish any book I started (any book designed to be read through, of course — not something that was primarily reference or a “pick up and dip in” book.)

I think in our “easy entertainment” era, we can lay aside something that doesn’t “grab us” right away and miss a treasure. A lot of older books weren’t written in a style to “grab” the reader right off the bat: they laid a lot of foundation first before getting on to the story.

Also, usually any book I pick up is one I’ve checked on enough to think I am going to like it — even a recommendation from a close friend whose tastes are similar is not enough to make me go get a book without further checking into it. Since I got the book in the first place because I thought there was a good chance I would like it, I’m willing to give it a fair chance.

However, life is too short to read a bad book, and I have so many I want to get to that if a book is really doing nothing for me after a good chance, I would have no problem with laying it aside. I will lay it aside sooner if it is truly bad — morally or in its writing, etc. But if it is just boring, I tend to give it more of a chance. I don’t have an arbitrary number of chapters or pages that I go through before giving up on it, but if there comes a point when I feel I am wasting my time, it’s bye-bye, book.

There have been a few times I’ve given up on a book but tried it later and liked it. A Tale of Two Cities was like that. It took me at least three, maybe four tries before I got interested in it enough to finish, but once I did it became one of my favorite novels.

Veteran’s Day 2009

“Throughout our history, America has been protected by patriots who cherished liberty and made great sacrifices to advance the cause of freedom. The brave members of the United States Armed Forces have answered the call to serve our Nation, ready to give all for their country. On Veterans Day, we honor these extraordinary Americans for their service and sacrifice, and we pay tribute to the legacy of freedom and peace that they have given our great Nation.”

“Veterans Day is dedicated to the extraordinary Americans who protected our freedom in years past, and to those who protect it today. They represent the very best of our Nation. Every Soldier, Sailor, Airman, Marine, and Coast Guardsman has earned the lasting gratitude of the American people, and their service and sacrifice will be remembered forever. In the words of Abraham Lincoln: ‘ . . . let us strive on to finish the work we are in, to bind up the Nation’s wounds, to care for him who shall have borne the battle . . . .’ On this Veterans Day, I ask all Americans to express their appreciation to our Nation’s veterans.”

President Bush, 2007 Veterans Day Proclamation

Along with honoring our veterans, I think their loved ones who stay behind deserve our support as well.

The Silent Ranks

I wear no uniforms, no blues or army greens.
But I am in the military in the ranks rarely seen.
I have no rank upon my shoulders. Salutes I do not give.
But the military world is the place where I live.

I’m not in the chain of command, orders I do not get.
But my husband is the one who does, this I can not forget.
I’m not the one who fires the weapon, who puts my life on the line.
But my job is just as tough. I’m the one that’s left behind.

My husband is a patriot, a brave and prideful man.
and the call to serve his country not all can understand.
Behind the lines I see the things needed to keep this country free.
My husband makes the sacrifice, but so do our kids and me.

I love the man I married. Soldiering is his life.
But I stand among the silent ranks known as the Military Wife.

–Shiela Gault

We appreciate you all!

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Missions Closet Ministry

When I mentioned stocking our missions closet recently, Jewel said she’d like to hear more about it. I am happy to oblige!

We “inherited” this ministry from another couple who left our church to help a smaller church in another area, so I don’t know exactly how this was started. When a missionary comes to speak at our church, a love offering is taken for them, but the missions closet is a little something extra. The love offering is given to them in the form of a check, and it may be the next day or longer before they are able to cash it, so some items in the missions closet are little necessities (toothpaste, etc.); other items are just for fun, for their family, and possibly for their ministry.

I have heard that some churches use a point system whereby points are figured to determine how much the missionary and his family are allowed to take, but I have no idea how points are assigned. We’ve found that the need varies so much from family to family that we’d rather leave it open-ended.

I can see, though, that a point system might alleviate some of the awkwardness and uncertainty that a few feel. Some “old-timers” who are used to this sort of thing have no problem coming in and choosing a few things, but a few feel awkward in wanting to avail themselves of the opportunity but not wanting to overstep or seem greedy. Usually we end up suggesting things for them to take or urging them to take something they seem interested in. My husband will often tell them, “It’s not going to do anyone any good just sitting here: go ahead and take it.” On the other hand, occasionally a missionary traveling by car is packed to the gills, or is flying and short on luggage space, or for various reasons really does not need anything, and we want to be careful not to “push” a visit to the missions closet on them to the point that they feel they have to come and take something they don’t want so as not to offend us. We might suggest a CD that can be easily tucked in somewhere, but we know what it is like to travel or pack too much stuff, so we try to encourage but not push.

Jewel was particular interested in what items we stocked in the closet, so I’ll list most of them. We started by just restocking what the couple before us had there and then asking visiting missionaries for suggestions. We also took into account what things we liked to take when we traveled.

Sheet sets in various sizes
Towel sets
Dish towels
Potholders
Throw blankets
Travel irons
Curling iron
A variety of toiletries, both full-sized and travel-sized
Craft items (decorative-edged scissors, punches, foam shapes, etc.)
Various tools
Bungee cords
Balls: football, soccer ball, etc.
Golf tees, balls
Socks
Basic baby items (onesies, sleepers, etc.)
Toys (We have separate bins for girls’ and boys’ toys.)
Batteries
Battery-lit lanterns
Flashlights
Car emergency kits
First aids kits
Thank-you cards, note cards
Stationery sets
Christian music CDs
Christian books for adults, teens, and children

Probably the books and CDs are taken the most, but sheets, towels, balls of all kinds, and tools are our most often taken items. Batteries and bungee cords are chosen pretty frequently, too.

Toiletries are the least-often taken items, which was surprising to me. One missionary commented that some churches give them gift bags, most often filled with toiletries, and they ended up with more than they could use. I don’t know if that’s the case generally.

We don’t stock food in there. One Sunday School class collected a variety of mostly canned foods (without checking to see if we could use them first), but none were ever chosen, and when they’d been in there for a while and it occurred to me I should check the expiration dates, and the majority of them were past the use-by dates. I was heartsick at the waste of their efforts and determined if we ever receive food donations again, I’d donate them to the rescue mission. Another reason not to stock food is to avoid attracting “critters.” I wrote a while back about some rodent visitors to the closet and their by-passing  boxes of macaroni and cheese and Jello to chew on handmade soap and towels (We keep towels in over-sized Ziploc bags now).

We occasionally have an odd thing donated that I’ll leave for quite a while, but if there is not interest over the course of several months I’ll remove them and donate them elsewhere. We don’t usually keep clothing in there: we just don’t have the space and we don’t want to encourage people to donate castoffs. But once someone gave a couple of really nice ladies’ coats, with the tags still on, that she found in her mother’s closet after she passed away. One was chosen by a missionary wife in Mongolia (where they really need warm coats!) and the other by another missionary wife who was in need of one that winter. Someone donated a belt once, and a visiting missionary walked in and went straight to it: it was exactly the size he needed.

And that’s when I feel most blessed and most used in this ministry: when someone’s eyes light up at seeing just the thing they wanted or needed.

As far as logistics go, though it would be nice to have a room singularly devoted to the missions closet, I think most churches are not equipped for that. Our “closet” also houses a piano where lessons are given, Christmas decorations, tape ministry boxes, and assorted other storage items. Sometimes it is a bit of a challenge, but we try to keep it neat and keep only missions closet items on certain shelves all together.

The missions closet is financed by a portion of the church budget and occasional monetary donations, and I turn in receipts for the items I purchase to the church business manager. For the first time this year, Wednesday night offerings in October were designated for the closet in preparation for the Missions Conference. And, as I mentioned, sometimes someone will give us an occasional item. As a general rule we don’t take used things: I’ve heard horror stories about things given to missionaries, and we don’t want them to feel they’re getting “leftovers,” or worse yet, junk.

Overall it is a very fun ministry to buy things and give them to people! And from the comments of missionaries, it seems to be much appreciated. The only negative is having to stay late: the missionaries usually have a table at the back with some of their things displayed, and they’re back there to talk with folks after the service. Then our missions committee meets with them for a few minutes, then we’re able to take them to the closet. But though staying late is the part my flesh balks at, more so the older I get, really, it is not a major sacrifice. Every ministry costs something, and that bit of my time is well worth it.

And that, my friends, is just about everything I can think of to tell you about a missions closet. I’d love to hear whether your church has one and how it is conducted, what kinds of things you keep in it, etc.

(One last note: obviously what I have been discussing here is different from a closet designated for folks who come by the church needing some kind of help. We were in one church that had a closet for that purpose, but it was mostly cast-off clothes, and I don’t think it was used much. Some churches have food pantries: ours has a “benevolence fund” that the pastor can access at his discretion. That kind of ministry is a whole different topic.)

Why hear a missionary presentation?

What do you think when you hear that a missionary will be speaking at your church? Are you disappointed that you won’t hear the pastor? Or excited about a change of pace? Are you tempted to stay home because it is “just a missionary” after all? Or looking forward to dozing off during the video?

A few weeks ago a young lady spoke at our women’s meeting about her summer on a mission field, and I was blessed in so many ways even beyond just hearing what the Lord did that summer that I made a list of some of the blessings we can glean as missionaries present their work. Our church is having a Missions Conference this week, so it seemed like a good time to revisit these thoughts and post them.

1. Jesus told His disciples to “Lift up your eyes, and look on the fields” (John 4:35b), and hearing a missionary presentation is one good way to obey that command.

2. We can see more fields than we could possibly visit in person.

3. Our hearts are stirred for the lost.

4. We are stirred to contribute both by prayer and giving.

5. We’re stirred to come alongside and help the missionary in his or her ministry.

6. It’s educational: we learn of other cultures from those who have actually experienced them.

7. We’re stirred up to serve the Lord in our own areas of ministry.

8. Our faith is encouraged as we see God’s hand at work in the lives of ordinary people who have stepped out in faith and yielded themselves to Him, and we are encouraged to do likewise.

9. Our faith is encouraged as we see God’s provision for funds, supplies, abilities.

10. Our hearts are knit together with brethren we might never meet in this life. We get to know our spiritual relatives whom we will meet some day in heaven.

11. We’re called to be willing to be used in whatever way God might see fit in the mission field He has for each of us, possibly even an overseas one.

How about you? How do you feel about missionary presentations?

Microfiction Monday

Welcome to Microfiction Monday,
where a picture only paints 140 characters.

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Susan at Stony River has begun a Microfiction Monday wherein participants write a story in 140 characters based on a particular image.  Design 215’s Character Counter helps keep track of the number of characters. It’s a fun exercise in creative conciseness…or concise creativity…

creepybears

Imagination on parade
Through the dell, across the glade
Before the dream and daylight fade
And slumber to its rest is laid
Neath the shade.

I Could Not Do Without Thee

The first time I heard this hymn was from a ensemble visiting our church, and it spoke to my heart, especially the second verse. I thought it was a new hymn, but looking it up after I got home, I saw it was written by Frances Ridley Havergal in1873. I like the newer melody better, but I don’t know who wrote it. It’s on one of my favorite CDs, “A Quiet Heart” by Soundforth (you can hear sound clips or buy individual tracks here; you can hear longer sound clips here, you can buy the CD either place, and no, this is not a paid advertisement.)

The whole song text is here as well as alternative tunes; I have usually only heard it sung with these four stanzas.

I could not do without Thee
O Savior of the lost,
Whose precious blood redeemed me
At such tremendous cost.
Thy righteousness, thy pardon
Thy precious blood, must be
My only hope and comfort,
My glory and my plea.

I could not do without Thee,
I cannot stand alone,
I have no strength or goodness,
No wisdom of my own;
But Thou, beloved Savior,
Art all in all to me,
And weakness will be power
If leaning hard on Thee.

I could not do without Thee,
O Jesus, Savior dear;
E’en when my eyes are holden,
I know that Thou art near.
How dreary and how lonely
This changeful life would be,
Without the sweet communion,
The secret rest with Thee!

I could not do without Thee,
For years are fleeting fast,
And soon in solemn loneness
The river must be passed;
But Thou wilt never leave me,
And though the waves roll high,
I know Thou wilt be near me,
And whisper, “It is I.”

The first time I heard it I was struck with the repetition of “lone,” “alone,” and “loneness.” I was feeling very much  alone at the time because Jim was traveling a lot, and I was reminded that I am never alone with Christ, and that’s not just a trite saying but a meaningful reality. And then the second stanza has been a help to me so many times. We truly have no strength, goodness, or wisdom of our own, but because of the redemption mentioned in the first stanza, we can experience the strength in the second stanza.