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When You’re Not the Chosen One

Posted on November 13, 2023 by Barbara Harper

We probably all know what it’s like not to be chosen in some way.

Some of us were always among the last chosen for any kind of physical game. Others were chosen last for the spelling bee.

We might not have been chosen for cheerleader, class president, or homecoming queen. Perhaps the person we liked in college chose someone else.

As adults we might not get the expected promotion or desired assignment.

As writers, we watch others get agents or contracts or win contests while we don’t seem to be making any progress.

I thought of this in the contrasting reactions of Esau and Jonathan in the Bible. In the normal scheme of things, each would have succeeded his father as leader. But God chose someone else instead.

Esau was the oldest son in his family, a position of privilege and honor in Bible times. Yet before he and his twin brother, Jacob, were even born, God said “the older shall serve the younger” (Genesis 25:23). Neither of them were ideal sons, but this pronouncement was made before they had done anything.

What was Esau’s response when Jacob received the birthright and blessing that would normally have gone to Esau? He hated Jacob and planned to kill him after their father died. (Genesis 27:41). Granted, Jacob obtained those things by deception and manipulation rather than waiting for God’s timing. But Esau had shown by his previous actions where his values were.

Jonathan was the oldest son of Israel’s first king, Saul. God rejected Saul due to his disobedience (1 Samuel 15). Jonathan could have ranted and raved that it wasn’t his fault that his father disobeyed God. Jonathan had good character and a good reputation. Why not make him king instead of his father?

But Jonathan didn’t grouse and complain and whine. He protected David from the machinations of Saul.

Years later, David had his own “not chosen” moment.

David wanted to build a temple where people could worship God. Nathan, the prophet of God, thought that was a good idea.

But that night, God told Nathan that David was not to build the temple. One of his sons, Solomon, would. God had other things, great things in store for David.

Did David sulk? No, he responded in humility, thankfulness, and love. Then he did everything in his power to help and prepare Solomon.

What are some things we can learn from not being the chosen one?

Sometimes not being chosen has nothing to do with merit. Jonathan was a fine, godly young man. But God had chosen David to be the next king.

But sometimes not being chosen does result from one’s actions. Saul lost his kingship because of disobedience. He still could have repented and gotten right with God, even if he was never reinstated as king. But he didn’t. Others in Scripture were removed from their positions for disobedience as well.

God sets up one and puts down another (Psalm 75:6-7). Sometimes we’ve prayed hard and long for election results that did not go the way we thought they would. All we know is that God has the big picture in mind.

God gives gifts and abilities. Though I probably could have worked hard and improved in playing some athletic game, if I had wanted to, I would never have been a star athlete. My gifts were elsewhere.

One of my favorite passages tells how God gifted different people to do various kinds of work on the tabernacle, even down to those who worked with metal, wood, weaving, and embroidery. The New Testament lists different spiritual gifts God distributes to Christians. One of those passages is 1 Corinthians 12, where Paul goes on to compare the church to a body, where it would be strange if we were all eyes or hands. We need different parts of the body to perform their function.

God has a plan for us. He may have chosen someone else for the particular opportunity we had in mind. But that doesn’t mean we’re on the bench. We need to seek His will for us and serve in the capacity He brings before us.

We can help and support the chosen one. Just as Jonathan helped David and David helped Solomon, we can aid the person chosen to do what we wanted to do.

One of our former pastors said he viewed his position as that of Elisha, who “poured water on the hands of Elijah” (2 Kings 3:11). That phrase conveys service and attending to the needs of another. This associate pastor wanted to serve and help the senior pastor as much as he could.

We can be content in God’s will and calling. In the book On Asking God Why, Elisabeth Elliot tells of a time when missionary Amy Carmichael was to attend a missions conference with a dear friend, nicknamed Twin. But when she saw the list of assigned seats for dinner, Twin was to be seated next to another friend, Mina. Amy wrote to her family:

Well, I was very glad that dear Mina should have Twin, and I don’t think I grudged her to her one little bit, and yet at the bottom of my heart there was just a touch of disappointment, for I had almost fancied I had somebody of my very own again, and there was a little ache somewhere. I could not rejoice in it. . .I longed, yes longed, to be glad, to be filled with such a wealth of unselfish love that I should be far gladder to see those two together than I should have been to have had Twin to myself. And while I was asking for it, it came. For the very first time I felt a rush, a real joy in it, His joy, a thing one cannot pump up or imitate or force in any way. . .Half-unconsciously, perhaps, I had been saying, ‘Thou and Twin are enough for me’–one so soon clings to the gift instead of only to the Giver.

It’s all about God’s glory and purposes. When Israel was going to fight against the Midianites who were oppressing them, God told Gideon his army was too big (Judges 7). They would be proud and attribute their win to their own abilities. God told Gideon to tell everyone who was afraid to go home: 22,000 did, leaving 10,000 still ready to fight. God said that was still too many. He sent them all to some nearby water to get a drink. Some of the men bent down and lapped the water like a dog. Others knelt down and cupped the water into their hands to drink. I’ve heard many sermons where the preacher read between the lines and proposed all kinds of reasons why God chose one group over the other. But that’s just speculation. The Bible doesn’t give us God’s reasoning. Personally, I think God just chose whichever group was the smallest. The 300 who lapped went on and won a miraculous victory that showcased God’s power, not their own.

Amy Carmichael’s original ministry in India involved evangelizing women. God used her remarkably in that capacity. Then she learned that little girls were being sold into temple prostitution. Elisabeth Elliot writes that Amy “prayed that God would enable her to find a way to rescue some of them, even though not one had ever been known to escape. Several years later, God began to answer that prayer…and in a few years Amy Carmichael was Amma (“Mother”) to a rapidly growing Indian family that, by the late 1940s, numbered about 900.” Amy struggled a bit with the fact that this ministry to girls (which later included boys) was quite different from what she had been doing. She was even criticized in some corners. But she felt that teaching, training, protecting, and taking care of children was only a different ministry, not lesser one.

Elisabeth Elliot wrote this about jobs, but it’s true for positions and ministries and opportunities as well:

This job has been given to me to do. Therefore, it is a gift. Therefore, it is a privilege. Therefore, it is an offering I may make to God. Therefore, it is to be done gladly, if it is done for Him. Here, not somewhere else, I may learn God’s way. In this job, not in some other, God looks for faithfulness.

In a sense, we’re all chosen. We may not have gotten what we originally wanted. But for those who trust in Christ’s saving work on the cross to atone for their sins, “we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them” (Ephesians 2:10). Whether we serve out in front or in obscurity, in a desired or unwanted position, with people who love us or people who try us, we can serve God by His grace, for His honor and glory.

(I often link up with some of these bloggers.)

Laudable Linkage

Posted on November 11, 2023 by Barbara Harper

Here are some of the posts that resonated with me this week:

Don’t Forget the Gospel During Bible Study. “We tend to hear this exhortation about remembering the gospel and think immediately of our moral behaviors—our successes or failures in the realms of pride, anger, lust, jealousy, and the like. But we need reminders about God’s love, Jesus’s work, and our new identities throughout our lives, and we need to connect these truths to our every endeavor, including studying the Bible.”

The Unexpected Blessing of a Rural Church, HT to Challies. “Though the preaching of the Word changed my heart, the people drew me in to hear it. The love of these Christians made this outcast feel welcome and enabled me to let my guard down and Christ in.”

Scripture Over Systems. “While these various systems can be helpful, I would suggest that adherents to them should not be so anchored to their system that they ignore or misrepresent Scripture that seems to challenge or contradict their systematic understanding. They must be wrestled with and humbly acknowledged.”

Avoiding Quick Repairs in Counseling, HT to Challies. “We all wrestle with the challenge of wanting to fix anything and everything. That’s true not just in terms of our broken ‘stuff’ but also in our broken lives and relationships. If we are honest with ourselves, we can probably admit to times when we have crudely applied spiritual duct tape to situations that needed more skill, love, patience, and grace.” Though this was written to professional counselors, we can all benefit from it.

Merciless in the Name of Mercy, HT to Challies. “It’s a mark of the church to embody a fierce commitment to welcoming sinners and exalting the Father who lavishes grace on the prodigal. But what form should mercy take? What does mercy look like? What does it require?”

Dare to Be a Daniel, HT to Challies. “Maybe you’ve been exposed to the kind of teaching from the Old Testament that uses its stories to highlight moral examples. Is that kind of teaching bad? Should we do such a thing? Should it be avoided for the sake of christological interpretation?”

Ambitious for the Quiet Life. “I find myself thinking a lot about 1 Thessalonians 4:11, ‘make it your ambition to lead a quiet life: You should mind your own business and work with your hands, just as we told you.’ I love the juxtaposition of ‘ambition’ with ‘quiet life’ in how the NIV renders it. It almost feels oxymoronic. How can you be ambitious for a quiet life? But notice that it doesn’t say to be ambitious for a lazy life, though; just a quiet one.”

When You Feel Cast Aside. I love this account of Gideon’s army from the viewpoint of a rejected soldier.

Christ is the way to Holiness. Spurgeon quote

Holiness is not the way to Christ;
Christ is the way to holiness.
– C. H. Spurgeon

Friday’s Fave Five

Posted on November 10, 2023 by Barbara Harper

I was sorry to miss Friday’s Fave Five last week. I haven’t missed many of them since I first started. I love this practice with Susanne and friends at Living to Tell the Story. It’s easy to come up with five good things some weeks. Others take thought and digging. But there are always blessings along the way, whether a week is good, bad, or mediocre.

I usually write my FFF post on Thursday afternoon. But Thursday of last week, I was in atrial fibrillation most of the day. Some of you will remember I had an ablation for that a few years ago. It’s not often that I have a full-blown episode any more, but it does still happen occasionally. I took an extra dose of my heart rhythm medication and rested at home, per the doctor’s instructions. I couldn’t do much more than rest, anyway. I tried not to get frustrated with the situation, but just take it in stride. Finally everything went back to normal in the evening.

Then Friday was busy through the afternoon, so I gave up on trying to post that day.

But I am happy to be back and to catch up with the last couple of weeks!

1. A visit. A couple of Jim’s friends from church came over to visit one morning. We haven’t been back to church yet since his surgery three weeks ago. He’s still dealing with pain and fatigue. We’ve been watching the “Facebook Live” broadcast from church on Sunday mornings, but it was good to see and fellowship with people in person.

2. “Hanging out” with the kids. We had not seen Jason, Mittu, and Timothy (son, daughter-in-law, and grandson) for two weeks because Timothy was sick with a bad cold. We were all being a little extra-cautious with exposing Jim with something so soon after his surgery. Finally, Saturday of last week, they texted to ask if we wanted to hang out, and they brought pizza, salad, and a very long churro from Costco.

3. Kids pitching in. We don’t have county garbage and recycling pick-up in our neighborhood. But the center to take all of that is not far, so Jim usually takes all our “stuff” out on Saturday mornings. Jesse has been doing that since Jim’s surgery.

Then, the morning after my heart rhythm issues, Jim had two doctor appointments, one very early. We had made arrangements with Jason to take him, in case my heart rhythm was still acting up. When it went back to normal, I asked if we should cancel plans with Jason. Jim felt I should probably just take it easy and not have to bustle around getting ready early in the morning. Jason also moved some things around Jim wasn’t supposed to pick up yet and brought a case of water from the car that I couldn’t carry.

The day of the heart situation, Mittu made two meals and cupcakes for us. She had already made five for the week after Jim got home from the hospital.

We appreciate all they’ve done for us!

4. A day of rest. When I first started having these heart rhythm issues several years ago, I was told I had SVTs (supra-ventricular tachycardia). I was instructed to try to regulate them at home for an hour or so, and if that didn’t work, to go to the ER. Then they tried to do an ablation for SVTs, only to discover I had atrial fibrillation instead. That required a different procedure, which was done a year or so later. But I was still in the mindset that I needed to go to the hospital when this happened. My cardiologist will answer direct questions, but he’s not good at proactively explaining things. Finally, after several times in the hospital, I understood that I didn’t have to come to the hospital for afib unless it lasted more than a day. I was on a blood thinner for the clots that afib could trigger, which is the main concern.

I found that being at home was actually more restful than going to the ER and being hooked up to an IV and electrocardiogram, along with people coming in and out. I spent most of the day in my desk chair, catching up on my blog reading and dozing. So it ended up being a day of rest.

5. Frozen grilled vegetables. I saw these in the grocery store and decided to give them a try. They could be cooked on the grill or in the oven. I tossed them in the oven one day alongside some baked chicken. Everything turned out great, and it was nice to just put the veggies in from the freezer without peeling and chopping. The next time I went to the store, I got a couple of their other veggie combinations.

Bonus: Panda Express delivery. Jim an I will often pick up Panda Express after the Sunday morning church service. I was craving Panda Express Sunday morning as we watched church from home and was trying to decide if I wanted it enough to go get it. We had plenty of leftovers we could heat up.

When church got over, Jim suggested we have a Panda Express order delivered, not knowing I wanted food from there. So we splurged and did that.

I hope you’ve had a good week filled with God’s fingerprints.

Review: Made for More

Posted on November 8, 2023 by Barbara Harper

In Made for More: An Invitation to Live in God’s Image, Hannah Anderson writes, “the goal of this book is to call women to recover an understanding of ourselves that is more basic than our gender. It’s a call to recover the image of God in our lives—to re-imagine not simply what it means to be a woman but what it means to be a person made in the very likeness of God Himself” (Location 131, Kindle version).

We tend to link our identity to various categories: gender, religion, vocation, location, political affiliation, etc. But such labels not only can’t embrace all of what we are, they can be divisive with people in other categories.

In order to know who we really are, we must first know who our Creator is—“accepting Him for who He is, not who we can conceive Him to be” (Location 287). Acts 17:28, Paul said, “In him we live and move and have our being.” “Simply put, there is one God and He is the Giver of all life. He created the world, and everything in it finds its source, its purpose, and its goal in Him” (Location 263).

Literally translated, imago dei simply means “in the image of God.” But in reality, imago dei means so much more. Imago dei means that your life has purpose and meaning because God has made you to be like Himself. Imago dei means that your life has intrinsic value, not simply because of who you are as an individual, but because of who He is as your God. Imago dei means that your life is sacred because He has stamped His identity onto yours (Location 402).

Yet God did not make us all alike. “We are different from each other and therefore dependent on each other. In other words, while each of us is fully made in the image of God, none of us can fully reflect and represent God alone. Instead we reveal the nature of God together; and as a result, we also find identity together” (Location 470).

Even though God created humans in His image, the first two sought their identity elsewhere, creating an identity crisis for the rest of the human race. “If they disobeyed, they would not simply be rejecting Him—they would be rejecting everything that was true about themselves as well. By choosing to turn from God to something else for knowledge, they would blind themselves to their own nature. And they would die because they would cut themselves off from the only thing that made them alive in the first place—God Himself” (Location 580).

Now, “Instead of living in dependent communion with Him, we fight for autonomy and the ability to rule our own lives; instead of loving and serving each other, we manipulate others to serve our own purposes; instead of exercising creative care of the earth, we consume it in our own greed and lust. Instead of unity, there is disunion; instead of harmony, there is brokenness” (Location 615).

The only way to get back to living in God’s image was for Jesus to identify with us that we might identity with Him.

The greatest identity shift that has ever happened was when God Himself became human and lived and died for us so we once more might live in Him. . .

[Jesus] is both the Image and the perfect Image Bearer, the Creator who deigns to live in His own creation. Despite being God, Jesus humbled Himself, took on human flesh, and came to live and die so that through His very life, death, and resurrection—through His metamorphosis—we ourselves might be changed (Location 764).

However, “Finding identity in Christ cannot be confined to one moment, because union with Christ is not simply an event; it is a state of being, a way of existing” (Location 810).

And that’s just the first third of the book. Hannah goes on to show how being made in God’s image affects what and how we love, our desires, roles, relationships, how we care for creation. Being made in God’s image, reflecting Him, guides our intellect, work, talents, and gifts.

The first book I read of Hannah’s was her advent book, Heaven and Nature Sing: 25 Advent Reflections to Bring Joy to the World, last December. I liked it so well, I wanted to read her other books. Though I didn’t do this on purpose, I ended up reading her books published at that time (two more have been written since) in reverse order according to my interest. Made for More was her first, but I read it last. Every time I considered it, I thought, “But I know what it means to be made in God’s image.” However, even though I knew basically what it meant, I had not considered it in all the depth and fullness and implications Hannah detailed here.

This is a book I should probably reread at regular intervals to remind myself of its truths.

I highly recommend this book to you, whether you have a working knowledge of what it means to be made in God’s image or not. If not, Hannah will explain it well. If so, you’ll understand it more fully and beautifully.

Review: The Rose of Winslow Street

Posted on November 7, 2023 by Barbara Harper

In The Rose of Winslow Street by Elizabeth Camden, Libby Sawyer and her elderly father were spending their summer visiting with her brother and his family when they received astonishing news. A group of people had moved into their long-time home in Colden, Massachusetts, claiming they owned it.

Michael Dobrescu fled from Romania with his sons, sister, and two friends in 1879. His late uncle had willed him the house on Winslow Street. So Michael took ownership, figuring the court system would work everything out in the long run.

As it turned out, Michael and his family were not gypsies, as Libby’s father asserted. And he did have a valid claim to the house. But Mr. Sawyer did as well.

The two families were at a standoff as the lawyers researched their claims. The townsfolk stood solidly behind the Sawyers, even to the point of refusing to do business with the Dobrescus.

But Libby felt that the family shouldn’t be mistreated, even as she hoped they’d move out soon. She started bringing them baskets of food. She found Michael infuriating and distrustful at first. But over time, she got to know the family and their story.

She grew to care for the Dobrescus, especially Michael. But she could not be disloyal to her father.

I liked that this story was a different premise than anything I had ever read before. It showed well how we can misjudge and make assumptions about people who are different from us.

There are other layers to the story as well. Libby can’t read, though she’s had multitudes of lessons and tutors. Her father thinks her mentally deficient, and Libby has always lived in her “perfect” brother’s shadow, even though she has gifts and talents of her own.

Also, Michael’s sister experienced horrors at the hands of the Ottomans who were fighting the Romanians. Broken and fragile, she has a long road to recovery.

I had never read anything by Elizabeth Camden. I thought the writing was mostly good, but there were a few inconsistencies in the plot line and writing pet peeves that marred it a little.

I’ve been struggling with whether to say this, and I want to say it carefully. Let me preface it by saying I believe a person is saved by believing in Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior, repenting of their sins, relying on His death on the cross for their sins and His perfect life lived in their place. I believe a person can be saved no matter what denomination they are in. I have known Catholics who I believe are saved. But the Catholic church as a whole, though it teaches faith in Christ, also adds extra-biblical requirements from the church. So it concerns me when the main spiritual emphasis in a book is Catholic. It makes sense from a historical standpoint that the Dobrescus are Catholic. But when going further into that denomination is the answer to part of their situation, I see that as a problem from a Christian fiction viewpoint.

I listened to the audiobook when it was free on Audible’s Plus Catalog. I thought narrator Barbara Rosenblat did a wonderful job, especially with the accents.

My Nest Is Empty, but My Heart Is Full

Posted on November 5, 2023 by Barbara Harper

I’m not sure I like the term “empty nest” as a description of life when children grow up and leave home.

Have you ever seen a used empty nest?

Some type of little brown birds used to build a nest every year on top of the corner post of the porch. We could watch their life cycle from our front door: the parents building the nest, the mother sitting, the babies growing and straining their beaks toward the food brought by the parents.

Finally, the parent birds would fly to a nearby bush and call for the babies to come. The babies didn’t move from the nest at first. But eventually, one by one, they flew off.

When we were sure they weren’t coming back, we’d take the nest down and brush away the debris of broken twigs and bird droppings from the post. The nest itself was a mess, as four or five baby birds lived there for weeks without a designated spot for relieving themselves.

Mother bird and I share similarities of raising a flock who have successfully gone on to live independently as adults. But that tattered, speckled, messy weaving of twigs doesn’t match up with how I envision my home or life after grown children leave.

As my oldest sons approached adulthood, I wasn’t sure how I’d cope when they left home. I always felt being a wife and mother were my main responsibilities and priorities. How could such an intense relationship with daily interaction abruptly change? How could I suddenly flip a switch from full-time mother to a “retired” one?

Actually, it wasn’t such a sudden switch after all. From the time we first teach them to feed and dress themselves and become responsible, we show them how to start operating independently of us. As they learn to drive, become involved in youth group or music lessons or a part-time job, they spend more and more time away from us. They go to camp and then youth group mission trips. When they go away to college, they take first steps towards adult living while coming home for breaks. (Even though mine commuted to college while living at home, they spent their days and evenings away.)

So by the time kids leave home, they and their parents have had some experience being separated.

Still, that initial move away from home is hard. My middle son left first, getting married a couple of months after college graduation. It didn’t hit me until he started bringing home boxes to pack his stuff in. When I got teary, he made a sign that said “Sewing Room” and put it on his door.

Even though he didn’t live under our roof after marriage, he and his wife lived just a few minutes away, and we saw them frequently.

Then we found out that we were going to be the ones moving away when my husband’s job transferred him to TN.

My oldest lived at home for a while after graduation, not sure what his next steps should be. But when we found we were moving, he decided it was time to step out. He had several friends in RI, and one of them offered him a job.

So it felt like our “nest” emptied by two-thirds all at once, as we left my middle son and his wife in SC, and our oldest went to RI, and we moved to TN.

That was agonizingly hard for all of us.

My youngest son moved with us, finished high school, and attended college locally. He lived at home for a few more years, but moved out a couple of years ago. He’s not far away, thankfully, though he’s talking about (and I am praying against) possibly moving to Washington state or Canada.

So my “nest” has been officially empty for a few years now. Here are some thoughts that helped the transition.

Though our children don’t live at home any more, I have not stopped being a mother.

I miss the everyday hearing how their day went and knowing what they’re up to. But I’m abundantly thankful for texts, emails, and FaceTime.

Sometimes they ask advice, and I try to refrain from offering any unless asked.

We still see each other frequently.

I still pray for them, sometimes I think even more intensely.

Though wifing and mothering were my first priorities, they weren’t exclusive. How much to be involved in other things was always a struggle as my children were growing up. But I felt service, both within church and to individual people, was important. I wanted to serve, but I also wanted them to see service was a normal part of Christian life.

I also wanted them to see that hobbies and friendships with others outside the home were healthy.

I had things to look forward to when my kids moved out. Though I missed them, I enjoyed turning one of their bedrooms into a sewing/craft room. Not only was that fun, but it helped so much to have a place for all my materials, to work on projects, and to leave them out.

I look forward to writing more.

I enjoy being able to pick up and and go somewhere with my husband without concerns about babysitters or teenagers at home.

I could “mother” others. Titus 2 specifically instructs older women to teach and encourage younger women. Sometimes that happens via a formal mentoring situation; most often it happens through friendships and “doing life” together. Though we might not consider ourselves “older women” when the nest first empties, we’re older than someone and can encourage them along the way.

Phyllis Le Peau followed Jesus’ admonition “to feed the hungry, care for widows, and visit those in prison.” She found ways to serve in each of those areas.

My mother-in-law’s hospice chaplain had taken on that as well as a jail ministry in retirement years.

An older lady in our church took it upon herself to visit my mother-in-law a couple of times a month in assisted living. When we moved and my mother-in-law lived with us, one lady in the church wrote regular newsy notes.

Though physical issues may arise and strength may wane as we get older, there are still a number of ways older women can serve others.

I think older women are some of the best at what someone called the “ministry of the pew”–showing an interest and talking with others. At every church we visited in the last year and a half, there was always an older woman who went beyond “We’re glad to have you with us” to make us feel especially welcome.

God’s grace is sufficient for every need at hand. God will enable us to transition to the empty nest years when they arrive—not three years before. He is always with those who believe on Him. He created the family structure such that our children grow up, “leave father and mother,” and serve Him as adults. We can trust Him for our children as they leave the nest, and for ourselves as we serve Him in different ways.

I loved being a full-time mother. But God doesn’t want me to live with regret and longing for the past. He has something for me at each new stage of life.

(I often link up with some of these bloggers.)

Laudable Linkage

Posted on November 4, 2023 by Barbara Harper

For those of you who enjoy the Friday’s Fave Fives, I’m sorry I missed posting yesterday! I usually write those posts on Thursday, but this past Thursday I was in atrial fibrillation most of the day. Then Friday was very busy. But I’ll catch up next week.

These linkage posts, however, I add to throughout the week as I read here and there. Perhaps you’ll find some of these interesting and beneficial.

Eternal Security: Fives Reasons God’s Gift of Salvation is Secure. “Can you lose your salvation? Some teach that you can. Others feel like they have. But what does the Word of God promise regarding the eternal security of those who have truly trusted Christ as their Savior?”

Quiet Time and Evangelism: How Much Is Enough? HT to Challies. “Spiritual disciplines are great (and necessary) when the goal is to know God better. Spiritual disciplines are soul-crushing when the aim is to get our metaphysical workout in each day, knowing that we could always exercise more if we were better Christians.”

Meditate on Scripture by Breaking it Down Into Phrases. “One of the best ways to meditate on Scripture is to break it down into phrases and detail the meaning. This can help you to better understand the text and to apply it to your own life.”

How to Mo u rn Over Your Sins, HT to Challies. “‘Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.’ (Matthew 5:4). Spiritual mourning is laden with blessing, and we are to go after it and get as much of it in our lives as we possibly can. The more you know of this mourning, the more joy you will experience in your life.”

What My Wife Taught Me About Life. “Last month, just about a year after my wife Phyllis died, I reread her book Handbook for Caring People, now out of print. I once again saw how this book reflected her own life of being deeply attuned to the needs of people—emotionally, physically, spiritually. I wasn’t the only one who thought she was perhaps the most caring person they’d ever known. So did dozens and hundreds of others.” Andrew Le Peau is the author of Write Better: A Lifelong Editor on Craft, Art, and Spirituality (linked to my review).

Reflections on the Reformation. I liked this balanced perspective.

Three Encouragements for Difficult Projects. “If you’ve ever been in the midst of a long, challenging project, you know the war you experience with regret, frustration, and self-flagellation.”

Aged Care Ministry: 3 Challenges and 5 Responses, HT to Challies. “I lost count over the past three years of how many Christians said to me: ‘Those old people must be very open to the gospel, as close to death as they are.’ It’s a plausible idea, but not at all true to my experience. I did not at all find nursing home residents more open to the gospel, but generally less so than those younger in years with more years of life ahead of them. I begin by describing three challenges to bringing the gospel to the frail elderly, and five possible responses to those challenges. I conclude with a word about how all people serve God, no matter how frail and incapacitated they are.”

Joni Eareckson Tada quote about abiding in Christ

October Reflections

Posted on October 31, 2023 by Barbara Harper

October has gone by in a blur. The last half was taken up with Jim’s surgery and recuperation. Much of the first half involved getting ready for it.

I mentioned on a couple of Friday’s Fave Fives that he went in for one surgery, but was discovered to have an undiagnosed hernia in his abdominal wall with some of his intestines poking through. Thankfully they weren’t in there tightly, so his digestion wasn’t affected. But, by God’s grace, another surgeon was available and willing to repair it while they had him open. Plus she was familiar with and a great fan of the robotic “arms” the original surgeon was using. We were incredibly thankful everything was able to be taken care of in the same operation.

Recovery has been a good days-bad days experience. But that’s probably how it usually goes.

This recovery time takes me back to pandemic loneliness, with not seeing anyone and watching church via Facebook Live. It had taken me a while to get used to socializing in person again after restrictions were lifted. And to get used to our current church being a bit busier than we’re used to. But I find I do miss people after all. 🙂 Thankfully we do have texts and emails and Facebook, and we have had people checking in with us and asking if we need anything.

Since the Covid pandemic began, we started having a family costume party on Halloween night. All of Timothy’s usual trick-or-treating places (the zoo, the mall) were closed then. But we enjoyed it so much, we’ve kept up the tradition ever since. We won’t be able to have it this year yet, with Jim not feeling up to it and Timothy being sick. But we going to try to in the next couple of weeks.

Our fall color finally came in, I think a bit later than usual. I have not been out much, but I’ve seen enough to be “filled up” and ready for the drabness of winter.

We’ve had a few cold days, but it’s been unseasonably warm lately. However, we’re due to have nights in the 20s this week.

Creating

I don’t usually make cards in October, since we’re past “birthday season.” But I did this year for Pastor’s Appreciation month as well as a few friends going through various trials.

These were for the two pastors. I ended up making a similar design for both.

The “Thank you” message was embossed with the Cuttlebug, and the bigger leaves were cut out with the Cuttlebug as well.

(Don’t tell anyone, but just between us, the smaller leaves on the corners of the “Thank you” on the second card were put there to cover up a decorative corner-cutting punch that didn’t turn out right. 🙂 )

And these were for a couple of friends who lost a loved one.

I made these four the same day, so I kept them relatively simple.The wording on these was made with a stamp.

This last one was for a friend recovering from surgery (his was the same day as Jim’s). I had time to play with it a little more.

I ended up liking this one the best. I wished I could have gone back and touched up the others a little more—but I had already mailed them.

And I liked the little leaves (made with punches) on the corners so much that I used them again, even without a mistake to cover up. 🙂

Watching

We’re trying out a couple of new TV shows that seem pretty good so far. It seems like every time I mention a TV series, though, something objectionable comes up on them right after.

One movie we saw that was pretty good was Return to the Hiding Place. It was based on rue events during WWII. One of the young men hiding out at Corrie ten Boom’s place was a teenager named Hans Poley. He was a student who had defied an order of the Nazis, and Corrie was his mother’s friend. He got false identity papers and joined the Dutch resistance, sneaking out at times to help them.

Reading

Since last time I completed:

Aftermath by Terri Blackstock, fiction, audiobook. An explosion at a concert kills a young girl’s friends and traumatizes her. Meanwhile, police are tipped off to pick up Dustin Webb, and they find explosives in his trunk. But he didn’t put them there. He calls a long-ago neighbor who is now a lawyer for help. Very good!
Chasing Shadows by Lynn Austin, fiction, audiobook and print. This book follows the lives of three women in the Netherlands in three different venues of WWII: a young Jewess, a Resistance fighter, and a farm wife on the home front. Excellent.
Made for More: An Invitation to Live in God’s Image by Hannah Anderson, nonfiction, Kindle. Excellent! ~~Just finished this weekend, not reviewed yet~~.
The Rose of Winslow Street by Elizabeth Camden, fiction, audiobook, ~~also just finished and not reviewed yet~~.

I’m currently reading:

Be Exultant (Psalms 90-150): Praising God for His Mighty Works by Warren Wiersbe
Elisabeth Elliot: A Life by Lucy S. R. Austen
How to Write a Sentence and How to Read One by Stanley Fish—though I have not really read this lately, having gotten distracted by the next one.
Someday Is Today: 22 Simple, Actionable Ways to Propel Your Creative Life by Matthew Dicks
Far Side of the Sea by Kate Breslin

I’m also going through Jen Wilkin’s Abide Bible study course on 1, 2, and 3 John with a ladies’ Bible study at church.

Blogging

Besides the weekly Friday Fave Fives, Saturday Laudable Linkage, and book reviews, I’ve posted these since last time:

Writing

This month has not lent itself to much writing. But I did send an entry to Lois‘s Remembering Our Parents site about my mother-in-law, here.

Our writing critique group decided that, instead of starting a new round of presentations and critiques and then stopping for the holidays, we’d go ahead and take a hiatus now through the end of the year. And though I’m grateful for the extra time, I’m missing our bi-weekly meetings already. We still keep in touch via text, though.

Looking ahead

Hopefully Jim’s recovery will progress through the next few weeks. I need to schedule some medical appointments for myself before the end of the year. But I don’t think there’s much else on the horizon until Thanksgiving. Hopefully November will be a restful month.

How was your October?

(I often link up with some of these bloggers.)

What Are You Stirred Up About?

Posted on October 29, 2023 by Barbara Harper

It’s easy to get whipped into anger and indignation these days. With social media, we hear people’s conflicting opinions more than we used to. News outlets keep the injustices of the world constantly before our eyes.

Some time ago, I noticed the harmful effect of stirred-up women in Acts 13:50. In the KJV this passage says: “But the Jews stirred up the devout and honourable women, and the chief men of the city, and raised persecution against Paul and Barnabas, and expelled them out of their coasts.” Some other translations use the word “stirred”; some say “incited.”

In this chapter, Paul and Barnabas had come to Antioch and shared the gospel, and many believed. “But when the Jews saw the crowds, they were filled with jealousy and began to contradict what was spoken by Paul, reviling him,” verse 45 (ESV). Then by verse 50 the Jews stirred up others to expel the preachers.

I know the passage refers to men as well, but it struck me both as a woman reader and as someone who has seen the results of getting stirred up woman both in others and in myself.

I looked up the Greek word translated as “stirred” or “Incited” in this verse and found it is only used here. So I looked up other verses using the English word “stir.” An interesting study!

One can be stirred up in a bad way (all references are from the ESV unless otherwise noted):

All day long they injure my cause; all their thoughts are against me for evil. They stir up strife, they lurk; they watch my steps, as they have waited for my life (Psalm 56:5-6).
Deliver me from those who work evil, and save me from bloodthirsty men. For behold, they lie in wait for my life; fierce men stir up strife against me. For no transgression or sin of mine, O Lord, for no fault of mine, they run and make ready (Psalm 59:2-3).
Deliver me, O Lord, from evil men; preserve me from violent men, who plan evil things in their heart and stir up wars continually (Psalm 140:1-2).
Hatred stirs up strife, but love covers all offenses (Proverbs 10:12).
A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger (Proverbs 15:1).
A hot-tempered man stirs up strife, but he who is slow to anger quiets contention (Proverbs 17:18).
A greedy man stirs up strife, but the one who trusts in the Lord will be enriched (Proverbs 28:25).
A man of wrath stirs up strife, and one given to anger causes much transgression (Proverbs 29:22).
And they stirred up the people and the elders and the scribes, and they came upon him [Jesus] and seized him and brought him before the council (Acts 6:12).
Then all the city was stirred up, and the people ran together. They seized Paul and dragged him out of the temple, and at once the gates were shut. And as they were seeking to kill him, word came to the tribune of the cohort that all Jerusalem was in confusion (Acts 21:30-31). (There are several passages in Acts about people being stirred up after the apostles preached.)
As for a person who stirs up division, after warning him once and then twice, have nothing more to do with him, knowing that such a person is warped and sinful; he is self-condemned (Titus 3:10-11).

Or one can be stirred up in a good way:

And they came, everyone whose heart stirred him, and everyone whose spirit moved him, and brought the Lord‘s contribution to be used for the tent of meeting, and for all its service, and for the holy garments (Exodus 35:21).
And every skillful woman spun with her hands, and they all brought what they had spun in blue and purple and scarlet yarns and fine twined linen. All the women whose hearts stirred them to use their skill spun the goats’ hair [for the tabernacle] (Exodus 35:25-26).
And Moses called Bezalel and Oholiab and every craftsman in whose mind the Lord had put skill, everyone whose heart stirred him up to come to do the work (Exodus 36:2).
Then rose up the heads of the fathers’ houses of Judah and Benjamin, and the priests and the Levites, everyone whose spirit God had stirred to go up to rebuild the house of the Lord that is in Jerusalem (Ezra 1:5).
Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near (Hebrews 10:23-25).
Wherefore I put thee in remembrance that thou stir up the gift of God, which is in thee by the putting on of my hands (2 Timothy 1:6, KJV).
Therefore I intend always to remind you of these qualities [in verses 3-11], though you know them and are established in the truth that you have. I think it right, as long as I am in this body, to stir you up by way of reminder…(2 Peter 1:13).
This is now the second letter that I am writing to you, beloved. In both of them I am stirring up your sincere mind by way of reminder, that you should remember the predictions of the holy prophets and the commandment of the Lord and Savior through your apostles (2 Peter 3:1-2).

Furthermore, “stirring” can be done by God, by ourselves, by other people, and by situations.

Sometimes we need stirring. Hosea speaks of sinful people “like a heated oven
whose baker ceases to stir the fire” (7:4b). A fire that’s not stirred might go out. Food that isn’t stirred while cooking will heat unevenly.

But sometimes we’re stirred up to the point of getting out of hand. Whipping cream is supposed to be stirred into a frenzy, but not scrambled eggs or vegetable soup. We can be rightly stirred up about an issue and handle it wrongly.

So when I feel “stirred up,” I need to ask myself:

What is stirring me up? Is this from God, from myself, from others?

What emotions are stirred up? Anger, spite, selfishness, jealousy? Or love and compassion?

Am I being stirred up to a mindless, destructive frenzy or to purposeful usefulness?

What am I stirred up to do? Lash out? Exact vengeance? Harm? Put someone in their place? Use my gifts to help others? Serve? Love?

I think of Amy Carmichael, stirred to compassion and action when a young Indian girl came to her care, rescued from being sold into prostitution at a temple in India. Amy eventually directed the building of an entire compound to house and teach both boys and girls.

Or William Wilberforce and Hannah More, who not only prayed against the evil of slavery but were stirred up to fight against it.

When I first read of the stirred-up women in Acts13, I only saw the danger. Their stirring led to the persecution of God’s messengers.

But after this study, I see being stirred up not just as a danger, but as a power for good or evil. Self examination in the light of God’s Word will help me understand whether that stirring is something I need to yield to or to confess and repent of.

(Revised from the archives)

(I often link up with some of these bloggers.)

Laudable Linkage

Posted on October 28, 2023 by Barbara Harper

Once again, I have not had much time at the computer this week. But here are some of the thought-provoking reads I found.

The Real War, HT to Challies. “Evil is real and it is staring us in the face. It cannot be legislated or medicated or rationalized away. It is a force that exists in every corner of the world; among all peoples, for all of human history. And we either surrender to its power, or we resist it; a cosmic conflict where neutrality is not an option.”

Prayer Requests from a Church in Israel, HT to Challies. “There is no one in Israel who doesn’t know someone impacted by this war. The state of Israel is devastated and in mourning, with funerals happening non-stop. Never before have so many Jewish citizens been murdered in one day since the Holocaust, and the rockets are still being fired into Israel, over 6,300 up till now. In the midst of all the atrocities, there are miracles that are taking place every day.“

Silly Putty Bible Study, HT to Knowable Word. “Sadly, many Christians use their Bibles like Silly Putty®. Just add the Spirit, and the Bible becomes putty in their hands, able to be molded into almost anything at all. Rather than approaching the Scripture as a treasure of truth for all Christians, some evangelicals have the dangerous habit of searching the text for a personal “promise” or “word” of guidance from the Spirit that is unrelated to the text’s original meaning.”

Navel-Gazing Won’t Help You Grow, HT to Challies. “For years I spent my Christian life spiraling into hopelessness over my shortcomings. Whether they were fleeting thoughts, sinful words, or hurtful actions, they weighed me down into ineffectiveness. They stole away the joy of my salvation, replacing it with fear. Instead of looking to Christ, I had my eyes fixed on me.”

A Word to My Inner Perfectionist, HT to Linda. “Then one day, a Truth dropped into my consciousness: Amy, you are finite. It was one of those realizations I’d always known was true but hadn’t really digested. Oh, right. I actually have limits. So that means I can be responsible and still forget things sometimes.”

How Should Christians Handle Disappointment? “Jobs, finances, health, people, and relationships all have the power to disappoint us. How should we—believers in Christ—handle the disappointments that hurt our hearts and weary our souls?”

Bookish Believers. “I had always believed fiction was nothing more than entertainment; reading theology was a better use of my time. However, I realized that fiction can do something mere theology can’t, which makes it especially valuable to the Christian’s intellectual and spiritual transformation.”