Happy Birthday to Jason!

Posted on July 17, 2009 by Barbara Harper

This is the first time in years Jason has been home on his actual birthday. And it’s his last one at home before getting married.

Hope you have a great day! Love you!

Baby Jason

Jason sr.

Jason is the “middle child,” and I alwayd loved what Erma Bombeck said about the middle child (as well as the oldest and youngest) in this column, originally posted in 1971:

I’ve Always Loved You Best

It is normal for children to want assurance that they are loved. Having all the warmth of the former Berlin Wall, I have always admired women who can reach out to pat their children and not have them flinch.

Feeling more comfortable on paper, I wrote this for each of my children.

To the first born……

I’ve always loved you best because you were our first miracle. You were the genesis of a marriage, the fulfillment of young love, the promise of our infinity.

You sustained us through the hamburger years. The first apartment furnished in Early Poverty… our first mode of transportation (1955 feet)… the 7-inch TV set we paid on for 36 months.

You wore new, had unused grandparents and more clothes than a Barbie doll. You were the “original model” for unsure parents trying to work the bugs out. You got the strained lamb, open pins and three-hour naps.

You were the beginning.

To the middle child…

I’ve always loved you the best because you drew the dumb spot in the family and it made you stronger for it.

You cried less, had more patience, wore faded and never in your life did anything “first” [actually you did have some of your own firsts], but it only made you more special. You are the one we relaxed with and realized a dog could kiss you and you wouldn’t get sick. You could cross the street by yourself long before you were old enough to get married, and the world wouldn’t come to an end if you went to bed with dirty feet.

You were the continuance.

To the baby…

I’ve always loved you the best because endings generally are sad and you are such a joy. You readily accepted milk stained bibs. The lower bunk. The cracked baseball bat. The baby book, barren but for a recipe for graham pie crust that someone jammed between the pages.

You are the one we held onto so tightly. For, you see, you are the link with the past that gives a reason to tomorrow. You darken our hair, quicken our steps, square our shoulders, restore our vision, and give us humor that security and maturity can’t give us.

When your hairline takes on the shape of Lake Erie and your children tower over you, you will still be “the baby.”

You were the culmination.

~ Erma Bombeck

Things I remember from childhood

Posted on July 13, 2009 by Barbara Harper

I don’t know what triggered this trip down memory lane, but a few days ago I started jotting down snippets of childhood memories. Then I found out via Cindy that Monday was Childhood Memories Day.

I was born in the late 50s. so I would have had most of my growing up years in the 60s.

— Record players for kids that came in a box that latched and had a handle. My aunt gave me a whole collection of 45 rpm records of children’s songs that I loved.

— Little Golden Books. And they are still around — I read them to my kids, too.

— Families bringing lawn chairs out into the front yard to talk with the neighbors while the children played together in each other’s yards in the evenings after dinner.

— My dad taking neighborhood kids for rides on his motor scooter up and down the street.

— Riding bicycles everywhere.

— Collecting glass bottles to get a refund for turning them in at the store. I don’t remember how much we got for them, though — does anyone?

— Nehi Cola in grape, orange, and strawberry. Fruit-flavored soft drinks don’t appeal to me now except just every once in a great while, but we loved them then.

— The bugs of summer: mosquitoes and calamine lotion, fireflies, noisy June bugs getting caught in the screen doors.

— Oscillating fans at bed time and nap time. I thought my aunt lived in the height of luxury because she had central air conditioning. I loved taking naps at her house.

— Having one of the first Barbie dolls with the black and white striped swim suit and pony tail on the crown of her head. I wish I still had her, but I passed her on to four younger sisters…

— Cars like this:

— Traveling with my grandmother. Her kids were scattered in Texas, Louisiana, and Alabama, and she drove to visit each of them and took me with her a couple of times. We called her the “galloping Grandma.”

— Spending the night with my grandmother and both of us staying up late reading.

— My grandfather’s teasing and distinctive laugh.

— A collie named Sam.

— Putting a note in the offering at church because I didn’t have any money and my cousin’s grandmother taking it out. 😦 I don’t remember what the note said, though.

— We lived near Padre Island in southern Texas, and nearly every celebration, party, get-together involved the beach. I had forgotten how much I loved and missed the water til we went back for a family reunion years ago. I saw then, too, why every beach I had seen since then seemed inadequate: I guess because it was an island, there were sand dunes as far as the eye could see in one direction and water in the other direction. Little strips of beach along a highway that we had seen in other places didn’t seem like a beach at all.

— The Wonderful World of Disney on Sunday nights, The Ed Sullivan Show, the Andy Williams Show.

— Tether ball and four-square on the playground at school as well as my friends and I pretending we were a singing group singing “Downtown” at recess.

— Commercials: Mr, Whipple, Brylcream, the Frito Bandito, “Mikey Likes It!”

— Going to eat at a drive-in restaurant every Friday night after getting groceries and eating steak fingers and the BEST milkshakes. I tried steak fingers at a restaurant as an adult, but they just didn’t live up to my memory.

— Going to see movies at the drive-inn theater in our pajamas.

Some of these might sound idyllic…there were unpleasant memories here and there, too, but why focus on those?

Anyone else remember any of these? What are some of your childhood memories?

Happy 4th and catching up

Posted on July 4, 2009 by Barbara Harper

Glorious 4th

Happy Independence Day! I’ve always loved this quote from John Adams’ letter of July 3, 1776, in which he wrote to his wife Abigail what his thoughts were about celebrating Independence Day, with his original spellings:

The Second Day of July 1776, will be the most memorable Epocha, in the History of America. I am apt to believe that it will be celebrated, by succeeding Generations, as the great anniversary Festival. It ought to be commemorated, as the Day of Deliverance by solemn Acts of Devotion to God Almighty. It ought to be solemnized with Pomp and Parade, with Shews, Games, Sports, Guns, Bells, Bonfires and Illuminations from one End of this Continent to the other from this Time forward forever more.

You will think me transported with Enthusiasm but I am not. I am well aware of the Toil and Blood and Treasure, that it will cost Us to maintain this Declaration, and support and defend these States. Yet through all the Gloom I can see the Rays of ravishing Light and Glory. I can see that the End is more than worth all the Means. And that Posterity will tryumph in that Days Transaction, even altho We should rue it, which I trust in God We shall not.

No guns or pomp or illumination here today — Jim is grilling hamburgers later on and we’ll have Grandma over and maybe get into a rousing game of Scrabble. 🙂 Often we’ll flip back and forth through whatever TV channels have a patriotic concert going on. I hate that we can’t have fireworks in our city limits–we used to get a few specialty ones like little tanks that shot off sparks while it rolled down the street and such. In past years we’ve made it out to some of the bigger displays in the areas, but somehow we didn’t this year. I don’t really like the heavy traffic, but I do enjoy the fireworks. We did go to an Army band concert last night in a downtown park.

CIMG2865

CIMG2868

CIMG2862

CIMG2864

I chuckled at how they described their concerts as “missions.” I guess in the military everything is a mission. It was a great night for it — clear and not too hot. There was a nice breeze after the sun started going down. We got a kick out of watching one older man with a walker really getting into the music — standing up much of the time, clapping or moving his hands in time to the music. It was the first time we had been to an event at this park, and we enjoyed it.

It’s been a whirlwind week. I had the ladies’ ministry newsletter/booklet due this week, and Jesse headed for camp on Monday for the week and Jim was out of town the first part of the week, so I thought it would be a great time of quiet to dig into it. But somehow Monday and Tuesday ended up being consumed with errands and other tasks. I was praying the Lord would give me a really good day working on it Wednesday, and He did. It’s really neat how I was writing something that had been on my mind for several weeks, and then this week in my reading from a devotional book and Bible study book, there were sections on the very topic I was writing about that contributed to my thinking and rounded out that section (thank you, Lord!). Thursday was pretty much taken up with Grandma’s birthday, and then the Lord gave me another good day to finish it up Friday. I was really hoping that would be the case and I wouldn’t have to work on it today — I wanted to be able to do family stuff today.

I didn’t get to the computer last night to “play” until evening yesterday, so I figured it was probably too late for the Friday Fave Five. I caught up with some of your blogs then, but it will probably take me a day or two to catch up with everyone.

There’s more “news” but this post is way long already, so I’ll leave you with a few scenes from Grandma’s birthday.

CIMG2849

CIMG2850

Jesse was at camp and Jason was working during this and the band concert, but Jesse got home today and Jason gets off early tonight, so we’ll all be here for dinner.

CIMG2857

CIMG2858

CIMG2860

Concentrating hard on the Scrabble board. We have to tone it down a bit because she fusses with us over words that don’t make sense to her, like xi and xu. But sometimes when you can play a high-point letter in a way that makes two words at one time using a double or triple space, it’s just too good to pass up. 😀

Happy Birthday, Grandma

Posted on July 2, 2009 by Barbara Harper

Today we will be celebrating my husband’s mother’s 81st birthday later on this afternoon.

Here is a picture of her as a young woman:

With Jim’s dad, I think during their dating days:

I love that picture — looks like it is from a 1940s movie.

From her 50th wedding anniversary a few years ago:

Several weeks ago at Jason’s graduation dinner:

Snippets

Posted on June 29, 2009 by Barbara Harper

Whew! Busy day. I feel like I’ve been “going” all day — and I am definitely not the Energizer Bunny! It’s nice to sit down for a while.

Jason got his first full-time pay check a few days ago and remarked, “Now I know why people gripe about taxes so much!” Welcome to adulthood, m’boy.

The boys went to a fellowship at church last week that I missed due to not feeling well, and when they got home I asked them what kinds of things were served. In naming some of the things, Jeremy said something that sounded like “foreos.” I said, “What….?” He replied, “Fake Oreos. Faux Oreos. Fauxreos.” I thought that was pretty clever.

Had a quick and easy dinner tonight. We had some leftover sausage from Jeremy’s pizza last week and a partial package of pepperoni, so I stopped at the store for some crescent roll dough (love that stuff! What did we do before someone invented it?) and provolone cheese and made pizza rolls. Then I borrowed an idea from Jason’s fiancee that she had made once while she was here and made a few with chocolate chips and a glaze made of powdered sugar, milk, and a bit of vanilla for dessert. Good stuff.

Friday’s Fave Five

Posted on June 26, 2009 by Barbara Harper

Susanne at Living to Tell the Story hosts a “Friday Fave Five” in which we share our five favorite things from the past week. Click on the button to read more of the details, and you can visit Susanne to see the list of others’ favorites or to join in.

1. Sunshine! After all the rain last week, it was nice to have almost no rain and plenty of sunshine.

2. Air conditioning! It’s been in the 90s and pretty humid. I can hardly be outside or run through the mall or W-Mart without sweating and turning all red. I don’t perspire in a dainty, ladylike way, unfortunately. I don’t know how I’d live without AC in the house and car.

3. Father’s Day. It was a fun time to honor Jim and make his favorite Boston Cream Pie.

4. Pink accessories and supplies. It’s silly, but this just makes me happy.

CIMG2841

I also saw a pink filing cabinet I’d like to get for when I convert Jason’s room into a sewing/craft/guest room after he gets married and moves out.

5. A successful shopping excursion. A former pastor used to say that women could go shopping for a white blouse, hit every store in the mall, not find a white blouse, and still have a good time. Not me!! If I can’t find what I am looking for, I get frustrated. I don’t really like traipsing from store to store looking for something — not for very long, anyway. Yesterday I found shorts for Jesse for camp, a gift for a baby shower, sheets for my bed (I’d wanted some with a pattern but had only been able to find solid ones), and towels with the colors I wanted — all at one store! And at great prices!

I’d been looking for towels with blue and tan and maybe a bit of brown, but at other stores the blue in the towels like that was kind of on aqua blue, which wasn’t what I wanted. I was glad to find these:

CIMG2843

And I love this adorable gift bag from the baby department: CIMG2842

And one extra as a bonus — I can’t seem to stop at five. 😳

6. This hilarious post of cartoons at Sally’s. I especially like the farmer in the dell and the squirrel on the psychiatrist’s couch.

Happy Friday!

Father’s Day

Posted on June 20, 2009 by Barbara Harper

Father and son tie I had a hard time deciding what to post for Father’s Day! I had some things I’d posted in past years that I really liked, and I know I have readers now that I didn’t have then, but there were so many I couldn’t decide which to post. So…I am going to post a new one from my files and put links back to some of the old ones if anyone has the time or interest to look back at them. Of course, I won’t be offended if you don’t — they’re just there for you to enjoy if you like.

Our thanks, O God, for fathers who follow in Your way,
And who, with glad and trusting hearts, exalt You ev’ry day.

Our thanks, O God, for fathers who show, by word and deed,
Commitment to Your will and plan, and Your commandments heed.

Our thanks, O God, for fathers who meet You oft in prayer,
And who, for all life’s toil and care, find strength and wisdom there.

How blessed are the children who in their fathers see
The tender Father-love of God, and find their way to Thee.

Author unknown

I’m wishing a Happy Father’s Day to my husband and step-father and thinking of my father, who passed on a few years ago. Happy Father’s Day to any dads reading as well!

Honoring the fathers in my life

Dad’s Famous Sayings

Favorite Father’s Day poems here and here

Jokes for Father’s Day

Favorite quotes about fathers

Fathers and sons, good and bad

Paul Harvey on Fathers

A couple of memes about dads

And, finally, I didn’t post this one, but I think I received it in an e-mail a while back, and Rob at ivman posted a job decription for dads that is both funny and poignant.

Untitled01

My mom

Posted on May 26, 2009 by Barbara Harper

Today would have been my mom’s 72nd birthday if she were still alive. I wrote the following a couple of years ago for Mother’s Day and wanted to repost it today in memory of my mom.

My mom and me:

From my earliest memory, my mom was my best friend — not in a way that was too chummy and hindered discipline. But we could talk about most anything, and I always knew that she was for me. I was the oldest of six, and we always enjoyed each other’s company.

She was not the most domestic person on the planet. I remember days cleaning the house together, snack breaks, and jokes about how no one ever came over when the house was clean.

My father was an alcoholic and very jealous and easily angry. She thought that once they got married and he was assured of her love and commitment that much of that would change. A word of warning: don’t ever marry expecting change. I love my dad, too — I’ve written more about him earlier. I wish they both could have come to know the Lord earlier. But there were rough times over the years, and Mom and I were kind of allies during those times. I think she did the best she could to be the best wife she could be, but with continued problems and without the strength God could give, the marriage ended. I struggled with my relationships with both parents during that time, but the Lord helped — it was actually as a result of all this that I was saved — and eventually my relationship with both was restored, as I mentioned a bit in an earlier post.

I always appreciated that, though my Mom didn’t share my beliefs and convictions for many years, she cared about me and tried not to offend and tried to support me in my new way of life.

She loved to give. Her “love language” was definitely giving. She loved to find things that would be “just right” for her kids. She would collect things all through the year to give at Christmas. She always gave generously yet always wanted to give more. She was also a delight to give to. I enjoyed just as much looking through the year for things to give to her.

She loved to call rather than write, and our conversations were easily an hour or more. She would call for special occasions or just to catch up. Since we always lived 1,000 miles away and were rarely together over holidays, phone calls became an unplanned but welcome tradition. Usually we’d talk in the evening after the rest of the holiday’s festivities were over and everyone had gone home. That’s one of the things I miss most during days like today.

When my husband and I first got married and moved away, we traveled there to visit: it would have been hard and expensive for her and my step-father to travel with five kids. But in later years they did come here, and it was a joy to visit with her on my turf. One of the times I enjoyed most was one day when they were visiting and my husband rented a boat to take everyone on the lake. I don’t know when she developed a phobia about the water, but she didn’t want to go, so she and I stayed at the house and I took her out to lunch. That lunch out together with just the two of us is one of my best memories.

She passed away in December of 2005. If I didn’t have faith that God’s timing is perfect, I would have felt it was much too soon for her to go. I don’t know why the Lord chose to take her so soon — I trust He will work all things together for good as He promised. One hope was that some of the rest of the family would be saved as a result, but as far as I know that hasn’t happened yet (if anyone feels led to pray to that end, I would be much obliged. )

I imagine her birthday and Mother’s Day will always carry a bit of a pang for me, but it also carries pleasant memories of my precious Mom.

Before my wedding:

My mom and step-dad:

I wrote about some amazing answers to prayer in regard to her funeral here.

Mom, I miss our phone calls and your love and thoughtfulness. I’m looking forward to seeing you again.

Honoring Mom

Posted on May 17, 2009 by Barbara Harper

I’m thinking about Mother’s Day a week late since we postponed most of our celebration due to all the busyness last week.

I was saddened recently to read Albert Mohler’s thoughts that “Mother’s Day is a bad idea.” I agree with some of his points: it’s wrong to passively neglect or actively dishonor one’s mother and then try to assuage guilt with a card and flowers on Mother’s Day. And I do agree some sentiments are over the top: sometimes when buying cards I have wondered if they were made for real people at all. Sentimentality, though, is often in the eye of the beholder. What might seem “gushy” and over the top to some might seem just right to another. And, yes, most holidays have become too commercial, but that doesn’t mean we need to do away with them completely. There are multitudes of options between going all out and not celebrating at all.

I consider Mother’s and Father’s Day and many holidays in the same way I think of Thanksgiving: we’re supposed to be thankful all the time, but there is something special about that one day and taking special care and thought into pondering just how much we have to be thankful for and the One to Whom we owe our gratitude. So with a day dedicated to parents: it’s one of the ten commandments to honor our parents, and Mother’s and Father’s Day is just one way to do so. It’s not that we save up our honor all year for this day: we honor them all the time, but this special day we focus on them, their love to us, and all they have done for us, and let them know we love and appreciate them.

I did not always honor her as I should have. I wrote more about learning to do so at the end of this post. A couple of years ago I wrote Things I love about my mom. I won’t repost it, but I did enjoy reading over it again. I only wish she were still here for me to honor, but I do honor her memory.

Today I wanted to share a couple of poems I’ve seen around the Internet.

This one was seen at The Sparrow’s Nest:

A Mother’s Day Prayer

I said a Mother’s Day prayer for you
to thank the Lord above
for blessing me with a lifetime
of your tenderhearted love.

I thanked God for the caring
you’ve shown me through the years,
for the closeness we’ve enjoyed
in time of laughter and of tears.

And so, I thank you from the heart
for all you’ve done for me
and I bless the Lord for giving me
the best mother there could be!

~Author Unknown~

Often this day can be painful to those who aren’t mothers and want to be. I saw this prayer at Quill’s Cottage and thought it beautifully encompassed many different types of mothers.

A Mother’s Day Prayer

God our Creator, I pray:
For new mothers, coming to terms with new responsibility;
for expectant mothers, wondering and waiting;
for those who are tired, stressed, or depressed;
for those who struggle to balance the tasks of work and family;
for those who are unable to feed their children due to poverty;
for those whose children have physical, mental, or emotional disabilities;
for those who have children that they do not want;
for those who raise children on their own;
for those who have lost a child;
for those who care for the children of others;
for those whose children have left home;
and for those whose desire to be a mother has not been fulfilled.

Bless all mothers, that their love may be deep and tender,
and that they may lead their children to know and to do what is good,
living not for themselves alone, but for God and for others.
Amen

~ Author Unknown

Here’s some other previously published Mother-related thoughts:

Mother’s Day funnies
Mother’s Kisses
A few Mother’s Day poems

Friday’s Fave Five

Posted on May 14, 2009 by Barbara Harper

1. Graduation weekend. Both the graduation ceremony and our celebratory dinner were highlights of the year!

2. Having my son’s fiancee back for a visit. She’s nice to have around. 🙂 It was fun just to have her here, but talking over wedding plans and such was a delight, too. And, I don’t know how to word this exactly, but I enjoyed seeing her and Jason’s relationship deepen and seeing them take “adult” steps like looking at places to live, etc. I’m seeing aspects of Jason I haven’t seen before. 🙂

3. Having my computer crash was NOT a fave thing, but having a son capable of handling it is. Plus with reinstalling everything I have newer updates, and getting rid of some old unused files streamlined everything. Thanks again, Jeremy!

4. Jesse’s piano recital Tuesday night and spring concert Thursday night. He did a great job!

CIMG2808

5. Having the above major events and a few others throughout the spring OVER!! There is not much outside the home on the schedule next week besides the usual church services and shopping, and it feels so good!

Bonus: 6. New shoes! I’d been needing some new everyday shoes, but hadn’t had time to shop. My feet are hard to fit and it isn’t always easy to find something I like that works that isn’t too expensive, but one day when I was in W*Mart I whipped by the shoe section, and voila! Found some nice ones for $11.

I didn’t mention Mother’s Day because we decided to postpone our own celebration since last week was so busy with graduation and company. We did have cards and gifts for my mother-in-law and my son’s fiancee’s mother and hope they had a great day! And all my guys made their awesome traditional Mother’s Day dinner.

If you’d like to see others’ favorites or join in with your own, stop by Susanne‘s. I’ve been enjoying this weekly opportunity to stop and reflect on good things from the past week.