Book Review: The Potluck Club Takes the Cake

Posted on September 1, 2007 by Barbara Harper

The Potluck Club Takes the Cake by Linda Evans Shepherd and Eva Marie Everson is the third in a series about a group of friends from a church who started several years ago getting together for prayer and a potluck meal.

The characters and their storylines were established in the earlier two books. There’s Evie, or Evangeline, long-time church and town member, founder and acknowledged unofficial head of the Potluck Club. She’d dating her “old flame” from high school days, Vern, the sheriff, who is also the father of Donna, another member of the Potluck Club. Donna, unbeknownst to others, is not a believer and has several issues to work through — the abandonment of her mother, the abortion of a child years earlier that she still hasn’t gotten over, her father’s dating of Evie, attention from several males when she wants to be left alone, and her work as her father’s deputy. Vonnie is an older lady who is very close to Donna. Her son was taken away when he was born, and her mother told her the baby had died, all because she was prejudiced against the heritage of the baby’s dead father. In a previous book Vonnie was shocked to discover her baby was very much alive and grown and wanted to meet her. Vonnie’s husband was even more shocked — he hadn’t known that Vonnie was married before. Lizzie is just settling into the quiet serenity of an almost empty nest when one son’s family problems cause him to move back home, later bringing his wife and child with him. Then her brother has a crisis in his family, necessitating that Lizzie step in to provide care for her elderly mother. Goldie’s husband has been unfaithful for years and she finally calls him on it, moving out of the house. He begins counseling with the pastor and Goldie has to decide whether he is sincere and what she should do. And then there is Lisa Leann, newcomer, transplant from Texas, general busybody, on an all-out and obvious campaign to wrest the leadership of the group from Evie. And Clay is a local reporter who is interested in Donna and who speculates what the Potluck Club as a whole is up to.

Each chapter is told by a different character, with Clay’s observations in between chapters tying them all together. I like the set-up because you hear the different character’s voices and see events from different points of view.

When I began reading the first book, I thought, “Well, Christian fiction should have flawed characters, because we are all flawed, but wow, these ladies are over the top!” I think, I hope, anyway that some of their character flaws are exaggerated for effect, especially Lisa Leann’s. And though the storylines may sound somewhat soap-opera-ish, Christians today do have to deal with several of the issues involved. The authors masterfully weave together each storyline ads the ladies help each other through each crisis and grow in grace and dependence on the Lord, and there are splashes of humor as well as poignant moments throughout. This was my favorite book in the series so far.

Saturday Photo Scavenger Hunt: Dirty

Posted on August 31, 2007 by Barbara Harper

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This is Suzie-the-dog getting undirty. You can tell how she feels about the process. Love her longsuffering, woebegone expression there.

In this picture the boys are more messy, really, than dirty. This was after the “finale” of their youth group competition at the end of the school year a few years ago. They were on opposite teams. They get a little crazy with the face paint and games that night! I think there was even a food fight….

Updated: This party kept coming to mind, so I decided to scan the picture in and include it, too. This was at Jason’s 6th birthday party 14 years ago. We had let him invite several guys for a birthday party at a state park which had a clear little stream they could wade in. On the invitations we advised that they wear something they could get wet and dirty in. I vividly remember Jason excitedly telling all his friends, “We get to get dirty!” Ideal fun for a 6 year old boy! All the activity is stirring up the dirt at the bottom and making the stream look all muddy. By the way, yes, that’s me there, very pregnant with Jesse. Can you believe he wasn’t born for another two months after this picture?

Show and Tell Friday: Shepherd picture

Posted on August 31, 2007 by Barbara Harper

Kelli at There’s No Place Like Home hosts “Show and Tell Friday” asking “Do you have a something special to share with us? It could be a trinket from grade school, a piece of jewelry, an antique find. Your show and tell can be old or new. Use your imagination and dig through those old boxes in your closet if you have to! Feel free to share pictures and if there’s a story behind your special something, that’s even better! If you would like to join in, all you have to do is post your “Show and Tell” on your blog, copy the post link, come over here and add it to Mr. Linky. Guidelines are here.“

Way back in March, I posted a drawing portraying the Good Shepherd hugging the lost sheep who was found and asked if anyone knew the artist or anything about it. A commenter provided a link to the full-color print by artist Katherine Brown. I had seen this years ago and loved the truth it portrayed as well as the expressions of both shepherd and sheep.

Well, my husband saw that post, and, unbeknownst to me, ordered it and gave it to me for Mother’s Day last May. He also printed the words to the hymn “That One Lost Sheep” which I had referenced on a previous post.

Though I loved the print and loved his thoughtfulness, I also wrestled with whether such a print was a violation of the second commandment about not making any graven images. I hadn’t thought of it when I saw the small image online, but for some reason seeing it big and full color, that came to mind.

My husband had thought the picture was just of a shepherd and didn’t realize that it actually represented Christ — he didn’t notice the nail prints at first. He said he thought it was ok, but if I felt uncomfortable with it, it would be fine to send it back.

I rolled it back up and put it in the mailing tube to keep it safe and thought about it off and on.

I read over the passage where the second commandment of the ten is contained in Exodus 20:

4 Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image, or any likeness of any thing that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth.

5 Thou shalt not bow down thyself to them, nor serve them: for I the LORD thy God am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children unto the third and fourth generation of them that hate me;

6 And shewing mercy unto thousands of them that love me, and keep my commandments.

I felt that, if we took it to mean we shouldn’t make images of anything in heaven, we also shouldn’t make any likenesses or images of anything, really, the way the verse reads. But just a few chapters later, the Israelites are told to make cherubim out of gold whose wings were to cover the mercy seat in the tabernacle (Exodus 25) and curtain hangings with designs of cherubims woven in (Exodus 26). So the verse in Ex. 20 must not mean that people aren’t to make any images or likenesses of any kind whatsoever. Verse 5 of Ex. 20 seems to indicate the main idea is not to worship or bow down to those images or likenesses.

I tossed out a question about it on a Christian message board, and one man said he didn’t feel we should have pictures of Jesus because we don’t know what He looked like — I guess maybe he felt any representation would then be a false one. But to me it’s better that way: if we truly knew what He looked like, people might be more tempted to venerate the picture in a wrong way. The point of this picture is not to show what someone thought Jesus looked like, but rather to portray the truth of the love the Good Shepherd had for His sheep, the relief that it was found, and the contentedness and safety of the rescued sheep in the Shepherd’s arms.

So, with all of that in mind, I decided to keep it. My husband had also given me a gift card to Michael’s to get it framed, and they have weekly 50% off coupons for framing, so I took it in a couple of weeks ago. I just got it back today! I should wait til I have it properly hung to show it. I just took the picture down that was above the fireplace and put this up to see how it would look. I want to put the framed hymn next to it or near it somehow. I’ll have to wait til Saturday when Jim can help me with it. But I wanted to go ahead and show what it looks like:

And here is the hymn:

I’ll put the words for you here:

That One Lost Sheep

Safe were the ninety and nine in the fold.
Safe though the night was stormy and cold;
But said the Shepherd when counting them o’er,
One sheep is missing, there should be one more.

Although His feet were weary and worn,
And though His hands were rent and torn,
Although the road was rocky and steep,
Still the good Shepherd searched long for his sheep.

There in the night He heard a faint cry
From the lost sheep just ready to die.
Then in His arms to shield from the cold
He brought the lost sheep back safe to the fold.

The Shepherd went out to search for the sheep,
And all through the night on the rocky steep
He searched till he found him,
With love bands He bound him,
And I was that one lost sheep.

— Seat

Booking Through Thursday: Statistics

Posted on August 30, 2007 by Barbara Harper

The Booking Through Thursday question for this week is:

There was a widely bruited-about statistic reported last week, stating that 1 in 4 Americans did not read a single book last year. Clearly, we don’t fall into that category, but . . . how many of our friends do? Do you have friends/family who read as much as you do? Or are you the only person you know who has a serious reading habit?

I am the only book-reader in my immediate family. 😦 I had visions of enjoying the classics with my kids, and we read a lot when they were little, we were regulars at the library, but somehow they all got away from the habit. My mother-in-law reads avidly and my mom did also when she was alive. Among my friends, there are several who do read books occasionally. Among my online acquaintances, though, there are many who read as much as I do and even more.

Works-For-Me Wednesday: Beware of over-sympathizing

Posted on August 29, 2007 by Barbara Harper

I first became aware of this concept through a beloved college professor, Dr. Walter Fremont, now with the Lord after having ALS for 20 years. He taught Child Psychology and Adolescent Psychology, among other things, and spoke at camps and conferences and retreats on the family.

In his book, Formula For Family Unity, in a chapter titled “Principles for Building Up Children For God,” he puts it like this:

Parents should not take the grit out of their children’s lives by protecting them from every hardship, blow, or disappointment. Remember, adversity strengthens character. For example…having them face the elements (rain, ice, and snow) while on a paper route will give them a strengthened will to face difficult times later in life. One mother thought she was helping her son…by getting up every morning at 5 a.m. to take him on his paper route. She was actually harming him by not letting him fulfill his own responsibilities. Children are resilient; they can take a lot if Mother doesn’t make them feel abused and neglected by an overly sympathetic attitude. Such a statement as, “Oh, honey, it’s so cold out there; I’m afraid you’ll freeze on your paper route,” produces a negative attitude in the mind of the child. Mother ought to say, “When you finish your paper route, I’ll have a cup of hot chocolate waiting and a good breakfast.”

Setting aside the example of a paper route (I don’t know if a child can do paper routes any more as they are so big now, and there are safety issues that weren’t as much of a concern then) and just concentrating on the principle at hand, do you hear the difference between the two responses from Mother in his example? The first can make the child feel sorry for himself and negative about what he has to do. The second is sympathetic and helpful, but in a positive, encouraging way, silently acknowledging, “It will be tough, but you can do it, and there will be something warm and comforting when you’re done.”

It’s kind of like the difference I learned to express when my firstborn was a toddler and preschooler. If he fell or did something where I thought he might have hurt himself, I’d gasp and rush to him: “Are you ok? Does it hurt? Are you bleeding? Poor baby! Come here and let me hug you. Shall I kiss it and make it better?” He may have been fine, but that reaction would make him think maybe he really did need that sympathy, and he would cry until he was comforted. Gradually I learned to just watch his reaction. If he seemed ok, we’d smile at each other, or I’d acknowledge what had happened in cheery voice, and he’d dust himself off and go on his merry way.

Of course, this has to be kept in balance. Sometimes sympathy, an arm around the shoulder, the knowledge that someone cares and understands, is just exactly what they need. God will give us the wisdom to know how to react to the different situations if we ask Him.

But I think as moms, especially, we have to curtail that inclination to want to smooth every path and make everything easy and take all the hardships and tough spots out of their lives. They’ll never be able to face the really tough stretches in the road of life later on if we do that.

See Rocks In My Dryer for a wealth of great tips.

A precious offering

Posted on August 28, 2007 by Barbara Harper

I was going through a stack of Elisabeth Elliot newsletters from years ago looking for a particular article I wanted to reference in the ladies’ ministry newsletter. I didn’t find that one, but I found a few others I wanted to quote from both in the newsletter and here.

Elisabeth’s newsletters were published from late 1982 to 2003. They are stored online here. I’ve been thinking I should probably print out the ones I don’t have in hand in case they are ever taken offline. Many of the articles I have read multiple times and they still minister to me.

This one caught my eye because I have read several accounts among my online friends in the last few days concerning taking their older children to college. I struggled with missing mine even though they are only 45 minutes away: I can’t imagine what it is like to leave them several states or even countries away. Though distance is a factor, I think what we wrestle with is the idea that they are taking yet another step away from us in the journey toward adulthood. We know that’s the way it is supposed to be, and we wouldn’t hold them back, but that doesn’t mean we don’t miss them.

Here, then, is a column from the May/June 2001 Elisabeth Elliot newsletter about the time her only daughter was preparing for college.

Shortly before my daughter Valerie, my only child, went off to college as a freshman, a “sudden tide” came over me one morning as I was working in the kitchen. She had been the great joy of my life for seventeen years. When she was about eleven or twelve, friends heard me speak of what seemed to me a near-perfect mother-daughter relationship.

“Oh, but wait till she’s a teenager!” they warned, “then you’ll have some rough times.” I was still waiting. I could not conceive of life without her.

“She has grown up,” I told myself. “My job is finished, the job I loved more than anything else I have ever done. The nest is about to empty.”

Overcome with sadness, I sat down at the wicker table, picked up the phone, and dialed Van, who is the sort of friend you don’t have to explain things to. Tears came as soon as I tried to talk.

“It’s O.K., Bet,” she said quietly. “It’ll be O.K.”

She did not need to explain to me what she meant. She knew I understood. We believe the same things—things like Julian of Norwich’s “All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of thing shall be well.” But I needed to hear her say it. I needed to have the Word made flesh for me in her voice. Van’s simple word, “It’ll be O.K.,” encouraged me to trust and obey. I learned that in this renunciation I had what the seed has that falls into the ground—a new potential for life-giving. I would be lonely, but I now had something precious to offer in love to my Lord, which in turn would make something quite different out of my loneliness. In some mysterious way which I could not predict, that offering would bring forth fruit. It would make a difference to the wholeness of the Body of which I was but a single member.

The way we respond to the “givens” in our daily experience determines our growth in holiness. When we pray, “Give us this day our daily bread,” God answers that prayer, measuring out just what we need for spiritual as well as physical growth.

Wrapping up “birthday week”

Posted on August 27, 2007 by Barbara Harper

Jason’s birthday was in July while he was away at camp, and he wanted to wait til he got home to celebrate; then he wanted to wait til his friend came into town; then Jim had to unexpectedly go to an out of town meeting, so we finally celebrated on Friday evening.

We went bowling Friday afternoon, but on our 7th frame the proprietors had to reset the computers connected the scoreboards in each lane to the counter, which was supposed to take 3 minutes to reset and should have saved all our data. But they couldn’t get them to come back on. We waited for maybe 20 minutes or more, but then had to go because we had other events on the agenda. The bad thing was that I had bowled two strikes in a row and had a score of about 80 so far — a great day in bowling for me is when I break 100, and it looked like I was on my way! 🙂 Oh, well. When we told them we had to go, they gave us coupons for free games ad shoe rentals.

Jason’s visiting friend is of Indian descent, and Jason wanted to go to an Indian restaurant for his birthday dinner. I was apprehensive of offending his friend — I am not an adventurous eater and don’t like really spicy things. It did help with choosing what to order to have someone there who could explain the different dishes, and the waitress was also very helpful. They serve the food in little serving dishes in the center of the table, which each person then spoons onto his plate, so we were able to try bites of each other’s entrees. I was pleasantly surprised. I had tandoori chicken, which was very good. I also liked Jim’s beef masala and Jason’s chicken curry. Jeremy and Jesse had chicken tikka, which was a little too spicy for me. They had a type of bread called naan which was very good — it’s kind of like a soft puffy tortilla. I ordered mine with just butter, but some of the others ordered theirs with cheese. Both were great.

We headed back home to open Jason’s presents. The two major ones were a gift card to a favorite clothing store and a Nintendo DS light (what’s that saying about the difference between men and boys being the price of their toys? 🙂 ) He also got some flavored coffees (he’s my coffee connoisseur) and a few other little things.

Then we had cake and ice cream, and then Jesse took off for the all-nighter, a favorite annual event in the youth group where they go play laser tag and roller skate and other assorted things from 8:45 in the evening til breakfast the next morning. Why, I don’t know. 🙂 I do remember the thrill of staying up all night as a teen-ager, but I got over it.

So he was pretty much dead to the world Saturday afternoon. Jason took his friend up to the college Saturday so they could both check in and she could get moved into the dorms. We had had a lovely visit. It was nice to have a girl in the house for a change. 🙂

Jesse had had school camp last week: every year near the opening of the school year our school has a school camp with different chapel services, devotional times, and games, to get the school year started off on a right spiritual footing. Jim Van Gelderen was the preacher for the week. He was without the Minuteman team this time, but it is always a joy to have him at church.

But this week starts the first regular week of classes for Jesse, and Jason starts classes Thursday. So we’re getting in gear for our fall schedule.

The nice thing about the flurry of housecleaning at the beginning of last week is that, except for a few touch-ups, everything is done and I can relax on that front this week. Good thing, because I have the ladies ministry newsletter to work on this week (I can’t believe it is the last week in August already!) plus making up a master “wish list” for our missionary Christmas emphasis, plus a few other odds and ends.

So I have a busy but not too pressured week ahead. How about you?

Psalms Sunday: Psalm 42

Posted on August 27, 2007 by Barbara Harper

Erica at Butterfly Kisses has once again resumed “Psalms Sunday” in which whoever wants to can read and study the selected Psalm for the day and “share what the Psalm meant to you. Maybe there was a verse or two that spoke to you. Maybe the Psalm made you think of a story you would like to share with us. Maybe you would like to paraphrase the Psalm. Or maybe you would like to do an in-depth word study. What you write, what you share is up to you.” She provides a “Mr. Linky” each Sunday so those who participate can share the link to their own posts about the Psalm.

I really enjoyed doing this before. The Psalms are pretty easy to breeze through, looking for the verses that are familiar or that touch my heart, without really studying them in context. The being able to read and comment on what others have posted helps even more to bring out things I may have missed in my own study.

The Psalm for today is Psalm 42:

1 As the hart panteth after the water brooks, so panteth my soul after thee, O God.

2 My soul thirsteth for God, for the living God: when shall I come and appear before God?

3 My tears have been my meat day and night, while they continually say unto me, Where is thy God?

4 When I remember these things, I pour out my soul in me: for I had gone with the multitude, I went with them to the house of God, with the voice of joy and praise, with a multitude that kept holyday.

5 Why art thou cast down, O my soul? and why art thou disquieted in me? hope thou in God: for I shall yet praise him for the help of his countenance.

6 O my God, my soul is cast down within me: therefore will I remember thee from the land of Jordan, and of the Hermonites, from the hill Mizar.

7 Deep calleth unto deep at the noise of thy waterspouts: all thy waves and thy billows are gone over me.

8 Yet the LORD will command his lovingkindness in the day time, and in the night his song shall be with me, and my prayer unto the God of my life.

9 I will say unto God my rock, Why hast thou forgotten me? why go I mourning because of the oppression of the enemy?

10 As with a sword in my bones, mine enemies reproach me; while they say daily unto me, Where is thy God?

11 Why art thou cast down, O my soul? and why art thou disquieted within me? hope thou in God: for I shall yet praise him, who is the health of my countenance, and my God.

This is one of my favorite Psalms. Probably every Christian has gone through these times of talking to oneself, encouraging oneself in the Lord. There is nothing like a crisis to strip away distractions and false props and to create in us a realization for our deep need of God. When our tears are our meat, when others ask where our God is, when enemies oppress and reproach, when we’re cast down and disquieted, when we feel God has forgotten us, we suddenly find ourselves thirsting for His presence and power in our lives. We change our focus from the many problems to God: we remind ourselves to hope in Him with the faith that we will yet praise Him for His answer and deliverance.

Verse 5 speaks of “the help of His countenance” and verse 11 “health of my countenance.” When I know His countenance (which Dictionary.com defines as “face, visage, calm facial expression, favor, encouragement, moral support”) is upon me, I am helped, and my countenance is restored to health (Verse 11). He not only helps me with His countenance, He is the health of my countenance and my God.

Show and Tell Friday: Jason’s roses

Posted on August 24, 2007 by Barbara Harper

My middle son, Jason, took a friend to the store yesterday to get supplies for college and brought these back for me, for no special reason.

Interesting things seen around the blogosphere

Posted on August 23, 2007 by Barbara Harper

Charity at Vintage Threads made a wonderful collage of fall decorations and links.

Rabbit at The Hutch has a wonderful post about the Name of God regarding whether God cares what He is called.

Katrina at Callapidder Days has a two-part post about how injustices are perceived and handled and right and wrong ways to react.

Grafted Branch at Restoring the Years has a great post on children’s interruptions.

Dr. Jim Hamilton, Assistant Professor of Biblical Studies at Havard School for Theological Studies – Southwestern’s Houston campus, had a very thought-provoking interview on the topic of writing books reviews. (HT to Jason Button).

Chris Anderson references an excellent, thought-provoking article titled What You Can Learn from Calvin and Hobbes about the Message and the Medium, asking “If chintzy merchandise cheapens a comic strip, what in the world does it do to the gospel of Jesus Christ??!”