opinions

I don’t remember where this little bookmark came from, except that it was tucked in as an unexpected freebie with something else that I had ordered.

The design is cute. One side says “Quill Power.” But the quote on the other side is a little strange: “Armed with ink and opinions, this desk shall forever be my battlefield.”

A quick Google search doesn’t show any sources for this quote. But doesn’t it sound just like a lot of Internet communication these days?

There are a few problems, though, with being “armed with opinions.”

Our opinions might not be right. We might not have all the details. Our sources may be wrong. Our views may be skewed by our own frame of reference and not understanding another’s.

Even if our opinions are on the right track, however, is it best to “go to battle” with them?

Duty Calls by xkcd

It depends.

According to the Merriam Webster online dictionary, one definition for “opinion” is “a view, judgment, or appraisal formed in the mind about a particular matter.” Another is “belief stronger than impression and less strong than positive knowledge.”

If we go to battle with our opinions, judgments, and views, how do we determine who wins the battle? The one who speaks the loudest? Or uses the most words? Or is the most condescending towards other views? Or gathers the most “likes” and agreeing comments?

If my opinion is my own view or judgment, and the other person’s opinion is their view or judgment, how can we determine who is right? Even if our opinion is based on facts (as we perceive them), the other person might have the same facts, but interpret them a different way.

It’s not wrong to have opinions, even strong opinions. We don’t have to be spineless and wishy-washy, never expressing an opinion for fear of offending someone. But we need to remember our opinions are just that, and other people are entitled to theirs.

And then, do we even need to express our opinions all the time? A while back, during a period of unrest, the online sentiment was, “If you don’t share a correct opinion on these issues, then by your silence you’re complicit with the wrong side.” But not everyone with a blog or social media account will want to get in on every cultural conflict. They may have strong opinions but not feel their venues were the best place for them. They may want to reserve those thoughts for quieter, less volatile conversations.

Plus, we have access to so much more news and information these days, we can’t possibly have an opinion on everything, unless maybe we spend all day online.

Even on lesser matters, we don’t always need to share our own opinions. You’ve probably met people, as I have, who not only hold strong opinions about nearly everything, but must express them.

If a fellow blogger shares that she enjoyed roasted eel recently, we don’t have to say, “Eww, gross,” even though that’s what we are thinking. We might say, “Interesting. I’ve never had that.” Or we might not mention it at all.

It’s okay to discuss differing opinions if both sides can do so without devolving into anger and put-downs. If I say I love a certain book, and someone else says, “Oh, I hated that one.” I’d probably ask, “What didn’t you like about it?” And we might have an enlightening conversation. Or we might not. You learn, over time, what people you can have those kinds of conversations with and what people you can’t.

I respect and am more likely to listen to those whose opinions are slow in forming, based on years of wisdom and life experiences as well as Scripture, than those who write an opinion piece every week (or day) on the current hot topic. I’ve been greatly helped by sorting through issues by discussing opinions with a trusted friend.

If I am asked my opinion on something, I try to hedge it with “Based on my understanding . . . ” or “My thought is . . .”

But there is a difference between an opinion and absolute truth. An opinion may be based on truth or may not be. I can give way to some opinions, but I can’t give way on truth. Contrary to popular belief, truth is not elusive or ephemeral.

The Bible says, “God is spirit, and those who worship him must worship in spirit and truth” (John 4:24).

Jesus said, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me” (John 14:6).

The Holy Spirit is “the Spirit of truth” (John 15:26).

God’s Word is truth (John 17:17).

But even armed with truth, we don’t use it to bludgeon. We’re told to “speak the truth in love” (Ephesians 4:15). Our purpose isn’t to battle with our opinions, but to be gracious instruments through which God might “open their eyes, so that they may turn from darkness to light and from the power of Satan to God, that they may receive forgiveness of sins and a place among those who are sanctified by faith in me” (Acts 26:18).

(I often link up with some of these bloggers.)

Here’s another round-up of thoughtful reads.

God Sees the Whole Picture, HT to Challies. “Sometimes our dots line up, and we connect one to the other and the picture is clear. We see what God was trying to do and we say, ‘Oh, I get it. That’s why that had to happen that way.’ That’s why the tire was flat. That’s why I got sick. That’s why I lost my job. ‘Now I understand.’ But other times none of it makes sense. We wait for God to tie up the ends and put a bow on it so we can look at a completed package with spiritual satisfaction, admire the intricate workings of God and justify His actions. But He doesn’t and it doesn’t.”

Wise People Don’t Believe the Best About Everyone. “Heart-broken parents have told me, ‘I didn’t think my parents would hurt their own grandchildren.’ Yet those same parents abused the adults that sat before me when they were children. If they harmed their own child, why would they be different with their grandchild? Discernment feels mean to some people. They don’t want to hurt someone’s feelings. They think good people believe the best. Yet, that is not what Christ practiced.”

Her Weakness Is Her Strength. “Regardless of the cause or degree of the weakness, these are the ones who are to be the special objects of our love, protection, and affection. These are the ones we must accept as a special gift of God to the church. It is to the weakest that we owe the greatest honor, to the frailest that we owe the greatest allegiance, to the ones most likely to be overlooked that we owe the greatest attention.”

You Can Obey, HT to Challies. “We thank Jesus that he came, died for us and transferred his perfect life to our account. And then we can think that we won’t be perfect until glory so we kind of give up trying. Sinners gonna sin, innit.”

6 Truths to Cling to While You’re Praying for Your Prodigal. “God knows exactly where your child is. He has the power to engineer circumstances large and small to pursue your child and draw him or her to Himself. Sometimes the goodness of God leads men to repentance (Rom. 2:4), and sometimes His judgment breaks their stony wills. We can trust God to know which is most effective.”

Why You Still Need the Church Even If You Have Been Hurt by It, HT to Challies. “Yes, we’re imperfect, but imagine how much Jesus must love his people to continue to meet with them despite their blemishes. It’s that same love that Jesus offers you, wounds and all.”

No, I’m Not a Pro: How to Parent Our Children’s Souls, HT to Challies. “My children are immortal beings with eternal souls. I would say this takes my breath away, but I don’t want to give the wrong impression. It feels less like witnessing a pretty sunset at the beach and more like standing at the precipice of a mountain. The view is incredible but my sense of helplessness at the top of sheer rock is almost overwhelming. To be entrusted with the care of souls is beautiful and terrifying at the same time. It is a holy task.”

All of Our Opinions All of the Time, HT to Challies. “I’m not offering an opinion on whether or not Will Smith smacking Chris Rock was okay, I’m offering an opinion on why we should hesitate hopping in on the controversy of the day. . . ‘Is it necessary that every single person on this planet um, expresses every single opinion that they have on every single thing that occurs all at the same time?'”

When Motherhood Goes Unnoticed, HT to The Story Warren. “Our motherhood often goes unnoticed, and we can easily believe the lie that the work of it all isn’t worthy. There are seasons where our faithfulness seems fruitless, our efforts never enough. There is no actual ‘mom-of-the-year’ award, but we all long for it and constantly feel like we fall short. Our hearts are weary, and no one seems to care. But Scripture offers a different perspective and a greater hope than any outward praise and recognition can offer.”

Finally, this is an amazing piece of film work about an amazing phenomenon: time lapse of a spring garden blooming.