Checking In

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There’s not an official Friday’s Fave Five this week, because our hostess, Susanne, has family visiting and wants to spend as much time as possible with them.

I’m in the same situation. My oldest son came in late last Friday night, and we celebrated his birthday Saturday. My husband took off this week, so we’re enjoying a stay-cation. Due to COVID and rainy weather, we haven’t been able to do any activities in the area. But we’re enjoying hanging out, resting, and chatting.

My two sons who live nearby have to work but are both taking today off. They’ve come over for dinner and games most evenings. Jason and Mittu had us over there a couple of times, and Jesse is cooking for us tonight.

My favorites from this week are:

  • Family
  • Food
  • Fun and games
  • Fellowship
  • Free time

And we’re looking to continue this weekend!

Hope you are having a good week!

Why Aren’t Christians More Loving?

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A friend asked a question recently that I have been pondering ever since I read it: Jesus said His disciples would be known by their love. So why are some non-Christian people more loving than Christians?

It’s not a new question. It’s one I have considered before.

And it’s a general question. Many Christians are very loving and kind and put me to shame. And there are unbelievers who are most definitely unloving and unkind.

But the observation still stands, especially if you spend much time on social media. Christians, who should know better, can be just as vitriolic as anyone else. Worse, they would probably not describe themselves as hateful. So how do they miss the total lack of love in their responses?

The fact that people who don’t know God in a personal way can be kind hearkens back to our being made in the image of God. The fact that we have a distinction between kindness and hatefulness even before becoming Christians points to God putting that in our hearts. He made us like Himself, but that image has been marred by the fall of humankind into sin.

C. S. Lewis pointed out that people can be nice and still be rebels against God. In Mere Christianity, Lewis brings up a placid Dick Firkin and a nasty Miss Bates. You would think by their personalities that he is the Christian and she is not, but it’s the other way around.

You cannot expect God to look at Dick’s placid temper and friendly disposition exactly as we do. They result from natural causes which God Himself creates. Being merely temperamental, they will all disappear if Dick’s digestion alters. The niceness, in fact, is God’s gift to Dick, not Dick’s gift to God. In the same way, God has allowed natural causes, working in a world spoiled by centuries of sin, to produce in Miss Bates the narrow mind and jangled nerves which account for most of her nastiness. He intends, in His own good time, to set that part of her right.

The question is what Miss Bates’s tongue would be like if she were not a Christian and what Dick’s would be like if he became one. Miss Bates and Dick, as a result of natural causes and early upbringing, have certain temperaments: Christianity professes to put both temperaments under new management if they will allow it to do so.

But it does seem like, especially with redeemed temperaments, Christians should be more loving than they often appear to be. Jesus said, “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another” (John 13:34-35).

So why aren’t we more loving?

I don’t know all the reasons, but here are a few possibilities:

We feel “safe.” We know we’re saved by grace through faith, not by our good works (Ephesians 2:8-9). But we forget we’re saved unto good works (verse 10). Because we expend no effort in order to be saved, we forget there is effort involved in living the Christian life. The Bible describes Christian life sometimes as a battle or a race. We don’t become Christians and then coast our way to heaven without paying any attention to our words and actions. We should be continually growing in grace and the knowledge of Christ and bringing our words and actions more in line with His.

We know Biblical love is not just a feeling. One of my former professors defined agape love as a “self-sacrificing desire to meet the needs of the cherish object.” But that, even more than warm feelings, should spur us on to be careful of our words and actions, to sacrifice that desire to lash out.

We stand for truth. Sure, love involves telling the truth, and the truth can be hard to hear. But we’re to speak the truth in love. If love is a self-sacrificing desire to meet the loved one’s needs, how loving is it to club them over the heads with truth? How is that meeting their needs? It seems, rather, that it’s driving them further away from the very truth they need.

We misread Biblical examples. One man with a harsh demeanor felt he was following the example of the OT prophets. But who were the prophets preaching to? Israelites who were worshiping false gods and showing marked injustice to their neighbors. Some point to Jesus’ stern words to the Pharisees as an excuse to speak that way generally. But the Pharisees were those who added to God’s requirements and led people astray. These were serious issues that could lead people to a devastating end. We don’t need to address every disagreement in these ways. Somehow people who want to be as fiery as OT prophets miss the compassion and pleading those same prophets express. They also miss the NT admonition to “Have nothing to do with foolish, ignorant controversies; you know that they breed quarrels. And the Lord’s servant must not be quarrelsome but kind to everyone, able to teach, patiently enduring evil, correcting his opponents with gentleness” (2 Timothy 2:23-25).

There are different tiers of differences in our beliefs and practices. At the very top are things one must believe in order to be a Christian. If you don’t believe that Jesus is the Son of God or that you’re a sinner, you don’t understand true salvation yet. Doctrines like the virgin birth of Christ are vital, but people probably wouldn’t be able to articulate them or understand why they are important before becoming a Christian. (There’s a difference, of course, between not understanding something and rejecting it.) People have a variety of interpretations about end-time events or styles of worship, but can still fellowship together. Further down are differences that are not clearly spelled out in Scripture but that we derive from Scriptural principles. Some people don’t have television or Netflix in order to avoid setting worldly images before their eyes, but they shouldn’t insist that no one should have those things.

The problem is, some Christians treat everything as a tier one issue. I’ve seen Christians argue for their choice of a lower tier issue with more vehemence than they would a more crucial doctrine. Romans 14 tells us to allow for differences on these lower-tier issues without despising or passing judgement, even when our choices are better or wiser in our own eyes..

We’re not listening. We’re instructed to be “quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry” (James 1:19). We’re warned that “He who answers a matter before he hears it, It is folly and shame to him” (Proverbs 18:13, NKJV). This is what I most often see in online exchanges: it’s easy to share a drive-by response without taking the time to truly understand the nuances of what has been said in context. Not taking time to truly hear leads to making assumptions

We have blind spots. I was going to write a post specifically on our blind spots, but then I remembered I already had, here. God told the Laodicean church in Revelation, “For you say, I am rich, I have prospered, and I need nothing, not realizing that you are wretched, pitiable, poor, blind, and naked” (Revelation 3:17). In Malachi, God leveled a number of charges against His people, but they, in essence, said, “What are you talking about?” We need to pray, as David did, “Search me, O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts! And see if there be any grievous way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting” (Psalm 139:23-24). And if someone mentions something to us—especially if a number of people comment that a stance we took or an answer we gave was unkind, we need to prayerfully and humbly look into it. We know—or we should—that we’re not perfect and have a lot of growing to do. Spurgeon said:

Brother, if any man thinks ill of you, do not be angry with him; for you are worse than he thinks you to be. If he charges you falsely on some point, yet be satisfied, for if he knew you better he might change the accusation, and you would be no gainer by the correction. If you have your moral portrait painted, and it is ugly, be satisfied; for it only needs a few blacker touches, and it would be still nearer the truth.

We’re not forbearing. We’ve forgotten we’re “to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace” (Ephesians 4:1-3).

We want to be right more than we want unity. I’ve written several times that we can be both right and kind. When people say we should choose being kind over being right, I am concerned that they want to cut corners of truth that we shouldn’t in order to be unified with those whom we shouldn’t be. But there is a sense in which we hold our own opinions higher than anyone else’s and feel the need to leave a verbal smack-down with those who disagree. This has been a big temptation with all the differences over masks, vaccines, opinions about how the church should respond. etc. How are you supposed to be in fellowship with people in your church who have ridiculed your views on Facebook? I’ve had to “hide” some people who constantly ranted against my own (unstated) positions because it was constantly stirring up hurt feelings and wrong responses. We really don’t have to say everything we think. And for love of the brethren, we should be able to disagree on issues without demeaning those we disagree with. We need to show grace.

One of the lower-tier issues in NT times was what kind of foods were okay to eat (whether the OT food laws were still in effect, whether it was okay to eat food that had been offered to idols). Paul said, “Do not, for the sake of food, destroy the work of God” (Romans 14:20). We need to be careful that we’re not destroying the work of God over COVID or politics or anything else.

We fail to hallow God’s name in all we do. In what we call the Lord’s prayer that Jesus taught to His disciples, the first request is, “Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name.” The ESV footnote says “hallow” means “Let your name be kept holy, or Let your name be treated with reverence.” This involves not only carefulness about how we use His name, but carefulness in how we act as those who bear the name of Christian.

We’re basically selfish. This is my biggest problem, not so much in public verbal arguments, but in everyday life.

We feel superior. We lack the humility to acknowledge we might be wrong or might have misunderstood or might not have the full picture.

We assume the worst. 1 Corinthians 13:7 says love “believes all things, hopes all things.” One pastor put it something like “Love cherishes the best expectations of others.” Instead of jumping on what others have said and assuming their meaning or motives are bad, we need to assume they have the best intentions until we find out otherwise.

We fail to see people as God does. If they are not Christians, they’re not going to be led to consider the claims of Christ by people who handle those claims with an air of superiority or hatefulness. If they are believers, they are His precious ones, future glorified saints, fellow citizens of the household of God, sons and daughters of the King. C. S. Lewis said there are no mere mortals. They are our brothers and sisters in the Lord. Perhaps thinking of someone as a sibling makes you think of conflict. But we should love family even if we don’t always get along.

We’re not filled with the Spirit, Whose fruit is “love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control” (Galatians 5:22-23).

We’re not gazing enough on Christ. “And we all, with unveiled face, beholding the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from one degree of glory to another” (2 Corinthians 3:18). How do we behold Him? In His Word. Is it possible to spend time in the Bible every day and still not behold Him? Yes, if we’re just performing a duty, or if we’re not specifically looking for Him in the passage, or if we’re trying to fit Him into our preconceived notions.

Of course, we’ll never be perfect in this life. But we should be growing, becoming more like Jesus, more loving, until we’re truly.

It’s comforting to know that even someone Iike Elisabeth Elliot struggled with these things. In talking about meekness in her book Keep a Quiet Heart, she says:

But how shall I, not born with the smallest shred of that quality, I who love victory by argument and put-down, ever learn that holy meekness? The prophet Zephaniah tells us to seek it (Zephaniah 2:3). We must walk (live) in the Spirit, not gratifying the desires of the sinful nature (for example, my desire to answer back, to offer excuses and accusations, my desire to show up the other’s fault instead of to be shown my own). We must “clothe” ourselves (Colossians 3:12) with meekness–put it on, like a garment. This entails an explicit choice: I will be meek. I will not sulk, will not retaliate, will not carry a chip.

A steadfast look at Jesus instead of at the injury makes a very great difference. Seeking to see things in His light changes the aspect altogether.

May God give us grace to “be imitators of God, as beloved children. And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God” (Ephesians 5:1-2).

(I often link up with some of these bloggers)

Laudable Linkage

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I’m way behind on my blog reading this week, but here are a few thought-provoking posts I came across:

Strength for the Weary, HT to Challies. “As I sat with the mid-week church group, the people around me had no idea how I felt. What they saw was a man dressed in business casual who had just come from a day of work, and he had a smile on his face. What they did not know was I was forcing that smile.”

Don’t Feel Sorry for or Fear for Your Kids; Raise Them up to Walk in Faith, HT to Challies. “Don’t feel sorry for or fear for your kids because the world they are going to grow up in is not what it used to be. God created them and called them for the exact moment in time that they’re in. Their life wasn’t a coincidence or an accident.” This encourages me as a grandparent—I admit I have been concerned about the world my grandson is growing up in.

Ask the Forbidden Question in Bible Study, HT to Challies. On asking, “What does this verse mean to me?” “The reality is, there is an objective truth. Every biblical text was written with authorial intent—human author and the Spirit. . . . We must ask what it means to us, to our lives, to our personal discipleship.”

What Response Are You Going For? Though written from the standpoint of a Bible teacher, I think it’s good for writers as well.

Netflix’s “Pray Away” Seethes with Contempt for Christianity, HT to Challies. “As someone who worked in Hollywood for decades, I’ve seen firsthand the contempt the entertainment industry has for Christianity. But only after I left my gay identity—in exchange for a new identity in Christ—did I realize the special resentment Hollywood reserves for converts like me.”

I’ve seen a couple of videos about baby sea turtles hatching and making their way to the sea. One source said they hatch through the year, but mostly in summer. What fun to catch sight of them.

Happy Saturday!

Friday’s Fave Five

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It’s Friday, time to look back over the blessings of the week
with Susanne at Living to Tell the Story and other friends.

It’s been a busy few days, and I was thinking of skipping FFF this week. But then several favorites came to mind.

1. A sweet gesture. When we get Chinese take-out, we look at the fortune cookie messages just for fun. When my husband opened his, he said, “Nope, too late. She’s already here,” and then laid this in front of me.

2. Easy meals. I keep a couple of frozen meals or Hamburger Helper on hand for days when dinnertime comes and I need something simple, quick, and easy. I forgot a couple of those things until I went to get something else out of the freezer, so it was a nice surprise and a relief for this week.

3. Ticking off a to-do list. I have rather a sizeable one today, but got the idea (thank you, Lord!) to race through several of the smaller things on the list first thing this morning. That makes me feel more optimistic about the rest of it.

4. Anticipation. And why all this busyness and to-do lists? My oldest son is coming for a visit! I know he won’t care if everything on my list gets done—he’s seen the house at it’s worst and has helped me clean it for company in the past. But you know how it is. Suddenly you want spring cleaning done as well as half a dozen projects that have been sitting on the back burner. Still, I know it’s better to leave some things undone than to be frenzied or exhausted when he gets here. I have my list divided into musts and hope-tos. And it wouldn’t be a disaster if even some of the musts aren’t done, especially since I did the bathrooms yesterday. 🙂

5. One project done. I had a couple of Scripture verses I wanted to incorporate into the guest room decorating. I’m working on a beachy/coastal theme in there. I found several ideas on Pinterest and Etsy and even got a couple of inexpensive printable downloads on Etsy. But they ended up looking green, when I preferred blue—and I don’t know how to adjust the coloring. So then I looked up free wave clip art and made my own. Even these are greener than I want, but they’ll do. (Sorry for the shadow.)

Now I just need to get them hung up.

Time to get back at it—hope you are having a good week!

Anne Morrow Lindbergh: Her Story

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Before reading Anne Morrow Lindbergh: Her Story by Susan Hetrtog, I didn’t know anything about Anne except that she was the wife of famed aviator Charles Lindbergh and an aviator herself as well as an author.

Anne grew up as the daughter of the US ambassador to Mexico and a very ambitious mother. Anne was quiet, sensitive, and introverted. She felt her sister, Elizabeth, was everything she should be and wasn’t.

Charles Lindbergh became famous for making the first solo non-stop flight from New York to Paris. According to Wikipedia, this flight was “widely considered a turning point in world history for the development and advancement of aviation, ushering in a new era of transportation between parts of the globe.” Lindbergh’s feat turned him into an instant American hero and Time Magazine’s first “Man of the Year.”

Anne’s father became the financial advisor to Charles Lindbergh and invited him to their compound in Mexico for Christmas one year. Anne was enamored immediately, but expected Charles would fall for her sister. Charles didn’t seem to fall for anyone, but when he started thinking about marriage, Anne came to mind.

Anne thought long and hard about marriage to Charles before accepting. They’d have to deal with a lot of public attention: Hertog quotes one source as saying public interest in Lindbergh was about like that of the Prince of Wales. Another source said only the Kennedy family was more in the public eye.

Anne thought Charles was “beautiful,” but she was well-read, and he didn’t have much interest in reading (at least the kind of books she liked). She wasn’t sure she could live with someone without sharing this aspect of herself. She was sure that she would have to sacrifice for the relationship. But in the end, she decided she couldn’t live without Charles.

He taught her to fly and to navigate, and she accompanied him on many of his flights.

My biggest impression of Anne, at least from this book, is that she was a conflicted woman most of her life. She loved flying, but she missed her children when she flew. She loved domesticity, but resented how all-consuming it was and longed to have solitude and time to write. She both loved Charles and chafed under his leadership. She didn’t embrace her early Christian upbringing, but wrestled with sin and salvation and what it all meant (yet she said, “I wasn’t searching for God” but to understand herself, p. 427). She mixed in Buddhist and theosophist tenets with Christian ones. She espoused “Christian virtues,” yet seemed to miss its grace and salvation. “She went beyond the stern precepts of her ancestors’ Calvinism; she was searching for the ‘changeless light,’ looking inside herself, trying to make peace with God” (p. 411).

Charles was very domineering and could be incredibly insensitive, wanting Anne to spend days and weeks co-piloting with him and leaving their son with others on the son’s birthday and even one Christmas.

Anne believed in submitting to and supporting her husband, but didn’t seem to realize that submission and support didn’t mean never voicing a differing opinion. Anne had always been one to acquiesce, first to her mother and then to Charles. In fact, Charles and Anne’s mother argued over what should be included in their wedding while Anne sat back and let them decide.

The couple’s firstborn son was kidnapped from their home at the age of twenty months. According to Hertog, the investigation was totally inept, with differing agencies vying to be the one to solve the case. Ransom notes were delivered and Charles even paid a ransom, but the child was never recovered. Later the baby’s body was found buried not far from their home.

The kidnapping was a wound that never healed for Anne. The media frenzy drove the Lindbergh’s to England for several years.

As events were ramping up leading to WWII, Charles took an isolationist stance. He felt the cost of human life in a war against Germany would be too great. He was more concerned about Russian communism than German fascism and felt the former would take over Europe if the latter was defeated. But, to the shock of many, Charles said in radio addresses to the American people that he agreed that white people were a superior race and Americans didn’t need to fight other white nations over an issue that was not their problem.

Anne took her submission to Charles so far that she wrote a book expounding on his views, though it was “against her instincts” and she later regretted it.

Understandably, they fell out of favor. When war did come, Charles felt he should help his country even thought he disagreed with their fighting, but had a hard time finding anyone who would accept his help.

He condemned American cruelty during war, but somehow seemed to overlook Japanese and German cruelty. After the war, “Only a trip to a concentration camp, and a tour through the rubble led by a ‘skeleton’ boy, moved him to condemn the brutality of the Germans” (p. 418). “This kind of human destruction, he wrote in his diary, was not worth the fulfillment of political ends” (p. 419).

Somehow, the Lindberghs seemed to be forgiven after the war. Anne published several books, the most famous and enduring being Gift of the Sea.

Anne’s concern about the press proved true. Their attitude seemed to be “We made you, we have a right to you.” They made up stories when information wasn’t forthcoming. They endangered the Lindberghs—once “reporters stalked Jon (their second son) on his way to school. Sideswiping the Morrows’ car, they pushed it off the road and pulled open the doors to take the boy’s picture” (p. 278). Later, Charles’ ship arrived during a photographers’ ball. “On hearing of Lindbergh’s return, the conductor stopped the music, and the men, cameras in hand, rushed to meet the Aquitania. Stampeding on board, they hammered on Lindbergh’s door. When he refused to open it, one photographer broke into the adjoining cabin, took photos, and fled” (p. 348).

The author has access to the public (edited) letters and diaries and five years of interviews with Anne. She mentions one affair Charles had that was unknown to Anne until after his death. Wikipedia reveals that he had seven children by three different German women–perhaps these were unknown as well at the time of the book’s publication. The Lindbergh’s youngest daughter, Reeve, met with her German half-siblings.

One problem with this book was that it was hard to distinguish the author’s voice from Anne’s. The author spent a lot of time explaining what Anne wrote, but it’s hard to know if this interpretation was Anne’s or the author’s. It did seem the author inserted herself in the book more than was necessary and covered some of the same themes repeatedly.

Plus, I listened to the audiobook, and it wasn’t always clear when the narrative went from the author’s words into a quotation from Anne’s writing. I do have a hardcover copy of the book as well, which includes several photos. In some ways, I probably would have gained more and understood some of the connections better if I had read the book rather than listened to it. But, as it is quite long, I felt I’d get to it sooner via audio.

So, in the end, I know a lot more about the Lindberghs but respect them a lot less. There were traits to admire in each of them. But, like all of us, they were flawed people.

Strengthening Others

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If someone had said to me personally, or before our church congregation, “I want to strengthen you today,” I would have thought, “Well, thanks, but only God can do that.”

But during my last trek through Acts, I noticed several times the Bible said someone strengthened others. That gave me pause. How did they strengthen others? Why did the Bible phrase it that way instead of saying God strengthened them? I made a note to come back and look at those occurrences some time, and did that last week.

According to BibleStudyTools.com, the Greek word for “strengthen” in these passages means “to establish besides, strengthen more; to render more firm, confirm.” The KJV and a few other translations use “confirmed,” but most use “strengthened.” There are synonyms to this word all through the Bible, but this particular Greek word seems to be only in Acts. So for now I confined my study there.

In the first passage, Acts 14:19-23, men came from Antioch and Iconium and stoned Paul and left him for dead. But Paul got up, traveled to another city, and preached there. Then he returned to Lystra, Iconium, and Antioch—the very places that men had come from to stone him—and began “strengthening the souls of the disciples, encouraging them to continue in the faith, and saying that through many tribulations we must enter the kingdom of God” (v. 22).

You can imagine how the disciples might have been shaken. If this could happen to Paul, it could happen to them. These guys had who stoned Paul had traveled to another city to do so—what would they do to Christians in their own towns? But Paul encouraged them: Yes, we’ll face persecution. It’s part of the Christian life. But this is the true faith.

Matthew Henry says in his Commentary on the Whole Bible, Volume VI.—Acts to Revelation:

But is this the way to confirm the souls of the disciples and to engage them to continue in the faith? One would think it would rather shock them, and make them weary. No, as the matter is fairly stated and taken entire, it will help to confirm them, and fix them for Christ (p. 185).

Henry then goes on for several paragraphs bringing up other verses that talk about persecution being part of the Christian life and something even Christ experienced. 

The rest of the passage says they appointed elders in the churches, prayed, fasted, and “committed them to the Lord in whom they had believed” (v 23). No doubt these were an outworking of Paul’s encouragement.

In the second passage in Acts 15, some men were teaching newly-believing Gentiles that they had to be circumcised and keep the law of Moses (verses 1, 5). The apostles and elders met together to discuss the issue. “After there had been much debate,” Peter shared his experience of being taught by the Lord that God “made no distinction between us and them, having cleansed their hearts by faith.” To put them under the OT law would be “placing a yoke on the neck of the disciples that neither our fathers nor we have been able to bear. But we believe that we will be saved through the grace of the Lord Jesus, just as they will.” Paul and Barnabus followed with their experiences reaching Gentiles. The council confirmed that the Gentiles did not have to keep the OT ceremonial law and just asked them to observe a few things. They sent a letter with Paul, Barnabus, Judas, and Silas to the brethren in Antioch. “And when they had read it, they rejoiced because of its encouragement. And Judas and Silas, who were themselves prophets, encouraged and strengthened the brothers with many words” (verses 31-32).

Here the disciples were strengthened with truth and the rest that comes from grace. Instead of coming under a religion of works that they could never live up to, they could rejoice in the grace of God. One commentary here noted “Their work was the very reverse of those who had previously come from Judea ‘subverting the souls of the disciples (Acts 15:24).'”

The rest of the verses, Acts 15:40-41; 16:4-5; and 18:22-23, just mention that Paul, along with various companions, traveled place to place strengthening the disciples.

So from these passages, we can draw out these principles of how the apostles strengthened others:

Their presence. The elders in Jerusalem sent a letter, but they sent it with people to deliver personally, who then went on to strengthen them. Paul went back to several churches he started, watering the seed that was planted, encouraging them in person.

They shared truth and grace. God gives us strength through His Word. “Strengthen me according to your word” (Psalm 119:28b). The passage where Paul was persecuted presages Peter’s later epistle encouraging disciples not to be surprised at persecution, but to “entrust their souls to a faithful Creator while doing good.” The truth encouraged them. Then the Acts 15 passage brought them back to the foundation of grace rather than the added-on works of tradition.

They showed loving concern. Paul was so concerned for the disciples that he went back to the city of those who stoned him to encourage them. Though he was the one who had suffered, he wanted to strengthen them. Matthew Henry says of Acts 16:4-5, “that spirit of tenderness and condescension which appeared in these letters plainly showed that the apostles and elders were herein under the guidance of him who is love itself” (p. 203). What a contrast to the Pharisees, who protested at people being healed on the Sabbath in violation, not of God’s law, but their own, and who were so full of hate that they sought to have Jesus killed.

They were empathic. I love Peter’s empathy when he asks why they would put a heavy yoke on the new disciples that they had not been able to bear themselves.

Paul didn’t lessen the truth that persecution would come, but he encouraged them to bear it for Christ.

There is a sympathy that weakens and a sympathy that strengthens. One thing that stood out to me in Walter and Trudy Fremont’s book from many years ago, Formula for Family Unity, was this thought:

Parents should not take the grit out of their children’s lives by protecting them from every hardship, blow, or disappointment. Remember, adversity strengthens character. . . .

Children are resilient; they can take a lot if Mother doesn’t make them feel abused and neglected by an overly sympathetic attitude. Such a statement as, “Oh, honey, it’s so cold out there; I’m afraid you’ll freeze on your paper route,” produces a negative attitude in the mind of the child. Mother ought to say, “When you finish your paper route, I’ll have a cup of hot chocolate waiting and a good breakfast” (pp. 103-104)(2).

The mother’s second statement acknowledges the child’s difficulty and her sympathy, but in a way that braces him for what he has to face rather than leaving him wallowing in self-pity.

We can do the same as we interact with others. Sometimes we slap truth on like a band-aid without taking time to enter into another’s situation. No wonder what we say hits them the wrong way instead of ministering to them. Instead, Jesus was “touched with the feeling of our infirmities” (Hebrews 4:15, KJV). Since He “has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.” (Hebrews 4:15b-16).

Why does Acts say the apostles strengthened others instead of saying God did or the Word of God did? Strength actually came from God and His Word, but He sent it through His messengers. God often works through people. How we need to be faithful messengers, loving, caring, personally interested, sharing truth and grace.

Matthew Henry sums it up perfectly:

[Paul] preached that to them which strengthened them, which confirmed their faith in Christ, their resolutions for Christ, their pious affections to him. Disciples need to be strengthened, for they are compassed about with infirmity; ministers must do what they can to strengthen them, to strengthen them all, by directing them to Christ, and bringing them to live upon him, whose strength is perfected in their weakness, and who is himself their strength and song (p. 240).

(I often link up with some of these bloggers)

Laudable Linkage

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Here’s another list of good online reads:

To the Woman Who Is Deconstructing. “You’ve been raised with one understanding of who God is, what His Word means, and how you’re supposed to live, but lately the foundation of your faith feels a little . . . fractured. Something you’ve read or experienced or felt has changed you. It’s like you’re wearing a new pair of glasses. Everything you thought you knew about Jesus suddenly looks very different.” I don’t know that I’d equate deconstructing with questioning—though deconstruction probably begins with questions, it seems to indicate those who have gotten past the questions to actually dismantling their belief system. Nevertheless, this post has some good encouragement for when questions about faith come up.

Pastor, Your People Need the Hard Texts, HT to Knowable Word. Good for writers and teachers, too. “We love the highlights of Joseph and Genesis 39. But we also need the lowlights of Genesis 38. God meets us in the lowlights. It’s there in the wreckage of our lives that God shows us the way out.”

Who Gave You the Right? “The sanctified instinct of the Christian heart should not be to discourage but to encourage, not to further demoralize other people but to give them strength, to give them heart, to give them courage.”

Focusing on What I Can Measure, HT to Challies. “My physical health is more than the numbers I can measure. And my spiritual health is, too. It’s always tempting to focus on what I can measure in my relationship with God.”

Patience: More Than a Virtue for Motherhood, HT to The Story Warren. “The last thing I wanted to hear as I hurried the kids to get ready for church were the words I had spoken to them many times during the week, “Mom, remember patience is a virtue and a fruit of the Spirit.” They can’t remember to say thank you or where they last left their shoes, but they remember this?! I was beyond impatient. I was angry and aggravated—but also convicted. How easy it was to come up with such a memorable and catchy quotable to use on my kids, but how hard it was for me to receive it back from them!”

Identifying Stanzas in Lamentations. An interesting, different, and inspirational way to look at probably the most well-known passage in Lamentations—through the pronoun shifts.

How to Brainstorm a Nonfiction Writing Project. I think this would be good for brainstorming other things as well. I tend to just jot lists, but I can see value in this method.

How to Feel Comfortable in Front of a Camera. Often when trying to get a group photo, someone will protest that they hate having their picture taken. As people try to draw them in, they protest more. By trying not to call attention to themselves, they draw more attention. And I’ve often thought, “We all know what you look like anyway!” It’s not like no one else will see them because they’re not in a photo. But I have known of people who grieved because they had few photos of a departed loved one who always shied away from the camera. April‘s tips will help, whether you’re in a photo with a group or alone.

This video, HT to Steve Laube, reminds me of Psalm 8:3-4: “When I look at your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you have set in place, what is man that you are mindful of him, and the son of man that you care for him?” The God who created the vastness of all the planets and stars and space cares about us and the details of our lives.

Friday’s Fave Five

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It’s Friday, time to look back over the blessings of the week
with Susanne at Living to Tell the Story and other friends.

It has been a good week for staying indoors. Here are some highlights from the beginning of August:

1. Dinner out and free pie. I had plans to meet a friend for lunch at O’Charley’s for their free pie Wednesday. Unfortunately, my friend texted me the day before that she was sick. I was sad that she wasn’t feeling well and couldn’t get together. And I had my taste buds all set for that pie. So I asked my husband if he wanted to take his wife out for dinner and pie, and he indulged me.

2. Dinners and a celebration. My and my son daughter-in-law invited us to their place Sunday night for enchiladas. Then yesterday she texted me to say she could bring over dinner Thursday night. I was a little surprised, since they had just made dinner for us so recently. Come to find out, the meal was a celebration of my 15th blogging anniversary, along with pink roses and a sweet card.

3. Lunch take-out. I didn’t intend to make my faves all about food this week, but not having to cook is always a favorite. There’s an Asian restaurant we like, but it’s a little too far out for takeout generally. However, it’s not far from our church, so we swung by there after the Sunday morning service to get lunch and bring it home.

4. An overdue haircut. The stylists at the place I go have always done an okay job, but I finally found one who does the layering the way I like it best.

5. A little project. I saw this idea of shells and fairy lights in a Mason jar, but when I saw this lantern in Hobby Lobby, I loved it. Thankfully it was half off and I had a gift card. I had a container of potpourri with shells and little blue balls and flowers that I filled the lantern with.

Bonus: An inspirational movie. I mentioned in my book review for Unconditional by Eva Marie Everson that I had watched the movie the book was based on. Jim came in for the last part of it. I thought it was very good, all the more so for being based on true events.

How was your first week of August?

Unconditional

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Unconditional by Eva Marie Everson is based on a movie by the same name, which in turn was based on true events.

Samantha Crawford loves her life, living on a ranch with her beloved husband, Billy, riding her horses, and writing and sketching children’s books.

Then tragedy strikes. Billy is gunned down in an alley in a poor part of town.

Samantha loses her belief in God’s love and goodness. She doesn’t write any more.

At her lowest point, Samantha encounters a child hurt by a hit-and-run driver. Taking the child and the child’s brother to the hospital, Samantha runs into one of the children’s neighbors—her best from from school, Joe Bradford.

As Samantha reconnects with Joe, she learns he has kidney disease. But he spends his time ministering to the children in his neighborhood. He and his girlfriend, Denise, provide after-school snacks, attention, affirmation, and encouragement. But Joe’s time is running out unless he can get a kidney transplant.

Observing Joe’s simple faith and ministry, Samantha’s heart starts to warm again. But she’s also driven to find her husband’s murderer, convinced that the police have given up on the case. And she thinks she just may have found him—in Joe’s neighborhood.

I had not heard of the movie, but picked up this book on a Kindle sale because I had enjoyed some of Eva Marie Everson’s books. I didn’t know when I started reading it that it was based on a true story. “Papa Joe” Bradford started Elijah’s Heart to aid at-risk children.

Finding out the story was true made it even more heart-warming and inspirational than it already was. In an interview, Joe Bradford says about 97% of film is true to his life and the Samantha character is a composite of different friends.

The movie used to be on Netflix, but isn’t any more. However, it’s online here and on YouTube here. I enjoyed watching it last night. The book uses scenes and dialogue from the movie, but includes more information. Here’s a trailer for the film:

Have you seen or read Unconditional? If not, I hope you do.

15 Favorite Posts from 15 Years of Blogging

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I mentioned in my end-of-July post that I forgot my blogging anniversary until WordPress sent me a reminder. It’s been fifteen years!

Often in the past I’ve done something special to observe my blogiversary. Since it caught me off guard this year, I didn’t have anything prepared.

I had been pondering ways to bring some of old posts back to the forefront, since they were published before I knew some of you. Then, voila! The idea came to list fifteen of my favorite blog posts to commemorate my fifteenth year of blogging. There won’t be one from each year—that would have taken too much time to search out. But these were either fun to write or were special to me in some way.

So here we go, in no particular order:

  1. Coping when a husband is away. This is my top-viewed post of all time. I had no idea it would touch such a chord. My husband had to travel heavily for at least half, maybe as much as two-thirds of our 41-year marriage. Though I didn’t like it, I am thankful God used what He taught me to help others.

2. How Not to Become an Old Biddie. After seeing examples of different kinds of older ladies, I realized I needed to start working on what kind of older lady I want to be now. (Related: Why Older Women Don’t Serve and Ways Older Women Can Serve.)

3. With All Our Feebleness. Reflections on serving God with physical and other limitations.

4. My Ebenezers. In 1 Samuel 7:12: “Samuel took a stone . . . and called its name Ebenezer; for he said, ‘Till now the Lord has helped us.’” “Ebenezer” means “stone of help.” In this post, I listed some of my verbal “Ebenzers,” commemorations of the Lord’s special help in my life.

5. Having Devotions When You’re not Feeling Very Devoted. We’ve all been there, I’m sure. (Related: When There Is No Hunger for God’s Word.)

6. Strong Women. What feminine strength means and doesn’t mean, with literary and Biblical examples.

7. Encouragement for Mothers of Small Children in the area of trying to find quiet time with the Lord.

8. The Back Burner. The stuff on the back burner is all the more flavorful for its time sitting and simmering. So with the things in our lives we have to set on the back burner: they’ll be all the better for the wait.

9. Why Read? Why Read Fiction? Why Read Christian Fiction? Every reason I could think of for reading all of them.

10. Can Frugality Go Too Far? Even good traits can be carried too far.

11. It’s Not For Nothing. Caregiving can seem monotonous and futile when the patient sleeps most of the time, can’t speak, and isn’t interested in food, as was the case for my mother-in-law her last two years in our home. These were truths that encouraged me. (Related: Remembering the Loved One Who Has Forgotten You.)

12. Manufactured Spirituality. Routines and programs can help us spirituality, but sometimes we focus on them to the detriment of real spirituality.

13. The Quiet Person in the Small Group. How not to torture your introverts.

14 Going to a Church with Problems. They all have them, even the ones in the Bible. (Related: What You Miss When You Turn Your Back on Church.)

15. Myths and Maxims of Ministry gleaned over many years. Myth #1: “Since this is being done for the Lord, everything should go smoothly.” Nope!

These are the posts that floated to mind. If I had actually searched every year’s posts, I might have had a different list. But there’s probably a reason these are the ones that came to mind.

As you’ve noticed, I cheated stretched my numbers a bit. Sometimes I couldn’t decide between a couple of posts on a similar topic, so I included one as “related.”

I’ve noticed that I should probably go back and edit some of the older posts. One of the tendencies my first critiquer at a writer’s conference pointed out was “long, convoluted sentences” that should be broken into two sentences (or three or four). Hopefully some day I can correct those in my older posts.

Thank you so much to all of you who read and comment. Without you, this would just be an online journal. Nothing makes me day like hearing that something here has blessed and helped someone.

(I often link up with some of these bloggers)