Time Travel Tuesday: Wedding Edition

Posted on July 3, 2007 by Barbara Harper

I forgot about Time Travel Tuesday this week until I saw someone’s post on their blog! I guess thinking and planning around the holiday this week threw me off.

My Life as Annie hosts Time Travel Tuesday in which we look back at some time in our lives in relation to the topic of the week. This week the topic is our wedding.

My husband and I were still in college when we got married. I had one semester left — only 3 classes actually needed to graduate (it took me five years to complete a four year course 😳 ) and he had two. Actually his adviser advised us to marry — he told my husband his grades were dropping because he was dating too much and he needed to go ahead and get married. And we thought, well, ok then! 😀 (Interestingly, his grades did improve afterward!)

We got married in December. In all my wedding dreams, I had never wanted a Christmas wedding — but I had a choice between that December or the following August, so I took that December! I am one of those weird people who doesn’t like red, so we chose blue and silver for our colors.

I hadn’t been to that many weddings — there is so much I would do differently now. But the point is to join a man and wife, and we did accomplish that. 🙂

We got engaged in May just before saying good-bye from college in SC for the summer, then he went home to Idaho and I went home to Texas. I worked on wedding details through the summer, and we conferred on the phone a lot, then he came to Texas at the end of the summer to meet my family and finalize plans before we both left to go back to SC for school. We had never heard about wedding coordinators then (I am so glad someone invented them!), so we were planning everything ourselves. A lady in our church did a wonderful job with wedding cakes, so we asked her to do ours, and asked her for a recommendation for photographers. We each just had one attendant since most of our friends were from school and couldn’t come. My maid of honor’s mother made her dress in a blue floral fabric I loved — sort of like a jacquard, but not quite (I wish I had kept a swatch of the fabric!) The best man and ushers were in gray tuxes, and in looking back, I probably should have had the guys in blue and the maid of honor in a silvery fabric, because it ended up looking like the colors were blue and gray — which people had fun with since I’m from the south and he’s from the north (northwest, really, but that’s north enough for some people. 🙂 ) But we did have silver ribbons in the flowers and such.

I don’t remember whether we got a recommendation for the florist or just found someone in the phone book, but when Jim came, we made a trip to the florist I had picked out. We walked in that August day and told them we were planning a December wedding — and they promptly told us December was too busy and good luck finding a florist who would do a wedding in December! I was in tears, and as we drove home, Jim saw another florist shop. He parked the car and went in and asked if they would do a December wedding — and they said sure!

We had our first serious disagreement as a couple over wedding plans. 🙂 I had only been to weddings in my church, and they were all pretty much done a certain way. One element that was always included was that the bridal couple knelt on a little prayer bench during a part of the ceremony, and the pastor prayed for them. My husband-to-be had never been to our church, much less to a wedding there, and, not knowing that this was “always” done, said he didn’t want to kneel because his shoes weren’t in the best shape and he couldn’t afford to get new ones and he didn’t want to display the old soles of his old shoes to the congregation while he was kneeling. Of course, in my mind, we just couldn’t not kneel! It sounds so silly now — it would have been fine to stand or to angle the bench somehow so the soles of his shoes weren’t in people’s faces. Nice guy that he is, my husband conceded. I don’t remember if he got new shoes or just tried to spiff up his old ones.

So we had everything pretty much set before heading off for fall semester. I was actually student teaching that semester, and my supervisor was afraid I wouldn’t be able to keep my mind on it while planning for a wedding, but I assured her everything was all planned, and everything was fine. I can’t imagine doing that now — but I was young then. 🙂

The semester finally ended and we headed back to Texas with a few days to spare before the wedding. We couldn’t afford a nice restaurant for the rehearsal dinner, so Jim and I made dinner and served it at the church fellowship hall. My pastor’s wife set some very nice tables for it. Everything was going fine until the night before the wedding — our best man was driving by himself from Idaho to Texas and wasn’t there in time for the rehearsal. Jim asked the father of my maid of honor (from the C family that I have mentioned a couple of times before) to stand in if the best man didn’t make it in time, and he agreed to. But thankfully the best man arrived in the wee hours of the morning bearing gifts from Idaho. Jim’s parents didn’t come. They didn’t have any problems with our getting married, but it was a combination of being too close to Christmas and too much out of their comfort zone, I think. They are very, very private people — very open with their family and circle of friends, but not at all prone to travel new places and meet new people. I will admit that was a sore spot for a long time. Even though I understood on one hand, on the other I thought — for one Christmas out of all the Christmases of your lives you couldn’t do something a little different? And you couldn’t extend yourself for your youngest son? But — what can you do? You can’t be bitter and hold it against them ever after, so we just accepted it and moved on.

Every wedding has its problems. I think it was the morning of the rehearsal that the pianist called and said there was one piece in the prelude that she couldn’t master and asked if she could leave it out. That was fine. Then the wedding day morning one of the soloists called and was very sick. I called the pastor, and he was familiar enough with the song that he could sing it. He was already singing a duet with another lady. Since we had so many unsaved loved ones, we had asked him to take a little extra time to just go over the picture in Scripture (Eph. 5:31-32) of a husband and wife representing Christ and the church and the invitation in Scripture to become a part of the bride of Christ. He did have that emphasis anyway, but we just wanted it maybe extended or explained a little more for those unfamiliar with it. He teased my husband when he and his best man were getting ready by saying, “I’m performing a wedding, preaching a message, singing a duet and a solo. What do you have to be nervous about?” 🙂

The only problem during the wedding itself was that just before I was to start down the aisle, the greenery around an archway came loose and in what seemed like slow motion began unwinding itself around the arch and fell. A dear lady near the front, the other half of the duet, stepped up and tucked it back in.

One problem we didn’t discover til afterward — in many of the pictures my eyes were closed!

Other than that, everything went fine!

Here’s the wedding party. I was trying to go for an old-fashioned southern look — my maid of honor and I both had hoop skirts on. But later on I felt my dress and veil looked more Spanish than southern! We had bought this dress but I probably should have gone with the pattern for the bridesmaid dress and had it made.

Here’s one of the many with my eyes closed. 🙄 Isn’t that ridiculous?! I guess you could day I was looking blissful. I wasn’t terribly happy with the photography in general, but not much can be done after the fact. I am so glad for digital cameras these days! You’ll notice I didn’t do my hair — my hair doesn’t “do.”

One of the songs we used was “O Perfect Love,” an older song not heard much these days, but I came across it in a hymn book and just loved the words. I think someone sang this on the kneeling-on-the-bench part of the ceremony. 🙂 The other song we used combined parts of “Nearer, Still Nearer” and “The Sands of Time.” I had heard that at another wedding and thought it was beautiful. Both songs have the same meter and work well with the tune of either. I am trying to remember which tune we used — and I am not sure (this was over 27 years ago!) I think the one to “Nearer, Still Nearer.” I can’t remember which of the verses we used — the first for sure, an I think the second of “Nearer” and these couple from “Sands”:

Nearer, still nearer, close to Thy heart,
Draw us, our Savior—so precious Thou art!
Fold us, oh, fold us close to Thy breast.
Shelter us safe in that “Haven of Rest”;
Shelter us safe in that “Haven of Rest.”

Nearer, still nearer, nothing we bring,
Naught as an offering to Jesus, our King;
Only our sinful, now contrite hearts.
Grant us the cleansing Thy blood doth impart.
Grant us the cleansing Thy blood doth impart.

O I am my Beloved’s and my Beloved’s mine!
He brings a poor vile sinner into His “house of wine.”
I stand upon His merit—I know no other stand,
Not even where glory dwelleth in Immanuel’s land.

The Bride eyes not her garment, but her dear Bridegroom’s face;
I will not gaze at glory but on my King of grace.
Not at the crown He giveth but on His pierced hand;
The Lamb is all the glory of Immanuel’s land.

Patriotic quotes for Independence Day

Posted on July 3, 2007 by Barbara Harper

Some quotes for the Fourth of July:

From John Adams’ famous letter of July 3, 1776, in which he wrote to his wife Abigail what his thoughts were about celebrating the Independence Day, with his original spellings:

The Second Day of July 1776, will be the most memorable Epocha, in the History of America. I am apt to believe that it will be celebrated, by succeeding Generations, as the great anniversary Festival. It ought to be commemorated, as the Day of Deliverance by solemn Acts of Devotion to God Almighty. It ought to be solemnized with Pomp and Parade, with Shews, Games, Sports, Guns, Bells, Bonfires and Illuminations from one End of this Continent to the other from this Time forward forever more.

You will think me transported with Enthusiasm but I am not. I am well aware of the Toil and Blood and Treasure, that it will cost Us to maintain this Declaration, and support and defend these States. Yet through all the Gloom I can see the Rays of ravishing Light and Glory. I can see that the End is more than worth all the Means. And that Posterity will tryumph in that Days Transaction, even altho We should rue it, which I trust in God We shall not.

A thoughtful mind, when it sees a Nation’s flag, sees not the flag only, but the Nation itself; and whatever may be its symbols, its insignia, he reads chiefly in the flag the Government, the principles, the truths, the history which belongs to the Nation that sets it forth.
~ Henry Ward Beecher

Whatever makes men good Christians, makes them good citizens. ~ Daniel Webster

Liberty exists in proportion to wholesome restraint. ~ Daniel Webster

If our country is worth dying for in time of war let us resolve that it is truly worth living for in time of peace. ~ Hamilton Fish

Those who expect to reap the blessings of freedom must, like men, undergo the fatigue of supporting it.
—Thomas Paine

Having devotions when you’re not feeling very devoted

Posted on July 1, 2007 by Barbara Harper

Several days ago, I was starting out my devotional time as I usually do by reading the day’s passage from a book called Daily Light for the Daily Path. The verses for that day were mostly about attributes of God. As I got to the end of the page, instead of being thankful and full of praise or uplifted and inspired, I merely thought, rather tiredly, “Yeah, I know that already.” I was immediately rebuked by the coldness of my heart, asked the Lord to forgive me and quicken me, and went back though the verses, praising the Lord for each of the attributes I read there. Then I was thankful, full of praise, uplifted, inspired…and humbled.

There are a few thoughts from this experience I’d like to share:

First, sometimes we feel that “deadness of spirit” when we’re tired or not feeling well. Sometimes it actually works better to go ahead and take a little nap and come back to devotions later. Sometimes we’re just distracted and need to ask the Lord to help us focus. Sometimes we need to ask Him to show us any sin in our lives that needs to be confessed. Sometimes we need to ask Him to forgive us for our coldness and quicken us — a visiting preacher during one summer had an excellent message on the phrase “quicken me,” which recurs nine times in Psalm 119. For example, verse 25 says, “My soul cleaveth unto the dust: quicken thou me according to thy word” (the NKJV and the NASB use the word “revive”).

Secondly, when we come across passages that are familiar to us, we can try to read them with new eyes, as if we’ve never seen them before. If it is a story, like David an Goliath, we can try to picture it happening before our eyes. We can ask the Lord to help us get the lessons from it He has for us.

Thirdly, we need to remember we won’t always find something “new” in the Bible if we have been reading it for a while. We’ll never exhaust it — there will always be new things to learn. But we also need the repetition of the old truths we have learned so we don’t forget them. Over and over in the Bible we see God repeating Israel’s history to them, reminding them of things He had told them before. We see how people drift away from Him when they forget His truth. Sometimes the repetition is a deeply needed blessing. But if it seems “old news” to us, we can ask God to help us appreciate it anew. We can praise Him for it. We often don’t praise the Lord as we should. I’ve wondered at the phrase “the sacrifice of praise” in Scripture, wondering why the Lord called it a “sacrifice.” It may be because it is a “sweet smell” unto Him, or it may be that we have to give up thinking about ourselves and our problems for a while to focus on Him.

Sometimes we think we have to compartmentalize our devotions into reading, confessing, praising, and requesting. There is nothing wrong with that, but we can also let the confessing, praising and requesting flow as we read. When we come to a verse about an attribute of God or a promise, we can praise Him for it right then reflecting back to Him what His Word says. In fact, there is a Hebrew word that can be translated “confession,” “praise,” or “thanksgiving.” When we confess our sin, we say the same thing about it God does. So, too, when we praise Him, we say the same things about Him that His Word does, and as we do, we come to know Him as He truly is, love Him more, and align ourselves more closely with what He wants us to be.

Sometimes it helps to take a break in our usual routine and spend time is the Psalms or in favorite passages or in a Bible study book or do a word study we’ve been wanting to do.

Proverbs 27:7 says, ”The full soul loatheth an honeycomb; but to the hungry soul every bitter thing is sweet.” Sometimes we are too full of other things to hunger after God’s Word as we should. We can ask Him to show us what “junk food” we’ve been filling our souls with so we can replace it with His truth, and to create a hunger in us for Him.

Above all, I think, we shouldn’t wait until we’re “feeling” more “devoted” to sit down with the Bible. A former pastor of ours once said that one of his best times of prayer occurred when the last thing he felt like doing was praying, but he went ahead and just started out by confessing that to the Lord. Somehow in the process the Lord melted his heart. As I mentioned in the beginning, just going back through some verses I had just read and asking the Lord to forgive me and quicken me opened them up to me in a new way, and my heart was completely different afterward than it was the first time through.

In John 6:63 Jesus said, “It is the spirit that quickeneth; the flesh profiteth nothing: the words that I speak unto you, they are spirit, and they are life.” It is His very Word that the Holy Spirit uses to quicken us. The last thing we need to do when we’re feeling low spiritually is to avoid the Bible. That’s exactly what we need to revive us.

Majestic Sweetness Sits Enthroned

Posted on June 30, 2007 by Barbara Harper

This hymn was one of the favorites of a dear former pastor, Jesse Boyd (for whom our Jesse was named). Pastor Boyd has been with the Lord for several years now. I hadn’t thought about this hymn in a long time, but the other night I had the Christian radio station on late, and someone sang a few lines from it during a sermon. I was only going to post a few of the verses I was familiar with, but as I read these over, I don’t see how I can leave any out. But I think among my favorites are stanzas 4 and 5. You can find a MIDI version of the tune here.

Majestic Sweetness Sits Enthroned

Words by Samuel Stennett, 1787
Music by Thomas Hastings

Majestic sweetness sits enthroned
Upon the Savior’s brow;
His head with radiant glories crowned,
His lips with grace o’erflow,
His lips with grace o’erflow.

To Christ, the Lord, let every tongue
Its noblest tribute bring
When He’s the subject of the song,
Who can refuse to sing?
Who can refuse to sing?

Survey the beauties of His face,
And on His glories dwell;
Think of the wonders of His grace,
And all His triumphs tell,
And all His triumphs tell.

No mortal can with Him compare
Among the sons of men;
Fairer is He than all the fair
Who fill the heav’nly train,
Who fill the heav’nly train.

He saw me plunged in deep distress
And flew to my relief;
For me He bore the shameful cross
And carried all my grief,
And carried all my grief.

His hand a thousand blessings pours
Upon my guilty head:
His presence gilds my darkest hours,
And guards my sleeping bed,
And guards my sleeping bed.

To Him I owe my life and breath
And all the joys I have;
He makes me triumph over death
And saves me from the grave,
And saves me from the grave.

To Heav’n, the place of His abode,
He brings my weary feet;
Shows me the glories of my God,
And makes my joys complete,
And makes my joys complete.

Since from His bounty I receive
Such proofs of love divine,
Had I a thousand hearts to give,
Lord, they should all be Thine,
Lord, they should all be Thine.

I made some cards…

Posted on June 30, 2007 by Barbara Harper

I spent part of the afternoon making a few cards to use as thank you notes for those who had a major part on the Ladies’ Luncheon (forgive me for talking about that so much — it has been a major part of my life the last few weeks. 🙂 ) Anyway — I enjoy seeing other people’s crafts, cards, etc., so I thought I’d post these here. I’m still pretty amateur, though! I saw a link from Barb’s to Sentiments By Denise. Now she makes some beautiful cards!!

I noticed when I was was searching on Flickr that there wasn’t a group for hand made cards — so I ventured out and created one called Creative Cards. If you make cards, please join up!

Saturday Photo Scavenger Hunt: Sweet

Posted on June 30, 2007 by Barbara Harper

Theme: Sweet | Become a Photo Hunter | View Blogroll

There is this kind of sweet:

And this kind of sweet:

And then there is this kind….

…a 5 lb. bag of M&Ms. We used them to put into favors at our Ladies’ Luncheon. We also had some printed in words that matched our theme (“The Heart of the Matter”) and coordinated with our theme colors (pink and chocolate brown):

You can see more interpretations of this week’s theme here.

Show and Tell Friday: Favorite pins

Posted on June 29, 2007 by Barbara Harper

Kelli at There’s No Place Like Home hosts the “Show and Tell Friday,” asking “Do you have a something special to share with us? It could be a trinket from grade school, a piece of jewelry, an antique find. Your show and tell can be old or new. Use your imagination and dig through those old boxes in your closet if you have to! Feel free to share pictures and if there’s a story behind your special something, that’s even better! If you would like to join in, all you have to do is post your “Show and Tell” on your blog, copy the post link, come over here and add it to Mr. Linky.“

I don’t wear a lot of jewelry — I like it, but I just don’t always think to put it on, or the clothes I bought a particular piece for wore out long ago. Plus I guess I am pretty particular in my jewelry selections.

I wear mostly necklaces and pins (brooches — I don’t know why, but I hate that word.) I was just going to show the three cameos, but as I looked around in my jewelry box, I saw other favorites I wanted to share as well.

The two small pins on the right plus the cameo stick pin were given to me by my mom, so that makes them special, besides the fact that I love the way they look. My husband gave me the cameo with the blue background and the 1928 oval one with pink roses in the center. I love both pieces — the 1928 one is probably my favorite of all — but they are also special to me because he gave them to me. He may have given me the gold cameo also — I can’t remember. The one in the upper left with the little flowers I bought at a craft show when we lived in GA. I don’t know what it is made of, but I thought it was cute (the craft shows there are one of the few things I miss about living there! They don’t seem to have many around here). The one on the lower left with the dangling pearl is also one I bought, but I don’t remember where. I liked that it looked antique even though it’s not. I used to have an old-fashioned looking dress with a lace collar that that pin went really well with. Too bad dresses don’t last as long as jewelry does. 🙂

The gold cameo isn’t actually a pin: it’s a scarf clasp. There was a time — oh, maybe about 20 years ago? — when ladies used to wear scarves a lot, and one way to hold them together was with a scarf clasp like so:

I wish scarves would come back in style — I loved the way they looked and the way they added a bit of color or pattern.

I loved this cameo like that, but once I saw a friend wear a scarf clasp clipped over the top of a crew-neck sweater which she wore over a blouse with a collar. I thought it looked very sweet and feminine. I had a couple of dresses with a high rounded neck and a lace collar that this cameo looked nice with — it looked like a brooch pinned at the center of the collar where the two sides curved up toward the center.

As you can tell, I like jewelry that is smallish, feminine, and old-fashioned, even vintage looking. I do have some pieces in different styles, though — I’ll have to save those for another day.

I don’t like expensive jewelry, though, and I don’t think any of this is. A friend asked me once what I would do if someone gave me $2,000. I think I said I’d pay off some bills, give some to the church, get something for the house, etc. She said she’d buy jewelry. One $2,000 piece of jewelry. I’d be a nervous wreck if I ever wore anything like that!!! And — not to criticize her choices, because we’d all have different ideals of what to do if we had money to “blow” — but I just couldn’t stand the thought of sinking a lot of money into jewelry. And thankfully for me, it’s easy enough to find things I love without doing that. I’m sure my husband appreciates that, too. 🙂

Five things meme

Posted on June 28, 2007 by Barbara Harper

I saw this meme on several blogs a few weeks ago, but didn’t have time to do it then.

What were you doing 10 years ago?
June 1997: We were living in GA, finishing up the 3rd of our 4 years there and had also recently completed the 3rd of our 4 years of homeschooling.

What were you doing 1 year ago?
June 2007: About what I am doing now –enjoying the summer. I hadn’t started blogging yet, but I think I was reading others’ blogs at that time. (What ever did I do with myself before blogging? 🙂 )

Five snacks you enjoy:
1. chocolate chip cookies
2. popcorn
3. chips
4. M&Ms
5. Swiss cake rolls

Five songs that you know all the lyrics of:
1. Amazing Grace
2. How Great Thou Art
3. This Old Man
4. Honey
5. The Star of the County Down

Five things you would do if you were a millionaire:
1. Pay off all our debts.
2. Buy a more adequate house
3. Give to the church (that should be listed first, shouldn’t it?)
4. Set up college funds for the kids
5. Find a special cause or person to give to

Five bad habits:
1. Eating too much
2. Eating the wrong things
3. Staying up too late
4. Not using my time in the best ways
5. Not exercising

Five things you like doing: (Not in any order of importance)
1. Reading
2. Blogging
3. Watching good TV shows or videos
4. Playing games as a family
5. Visiting with friends

Five things you would never wear again:
1. Swimsuits in public
2. Mini-skirts
3. Short shorts
4. Headbands. I wish I could, but they just roll off my head.
5. Can’t think of anything else. There are plenty of things I wouldn’t wear but most of them are not things I used to wear. Most of the changes in what I would wear come from becoming a Christian and having a better understanding of modesty.

Five favorite toys:
1. The computer
2. My camera
3. The Wii
4. For my kids when they were little: Legos and
5. Little Tykes riding toys (we had the red car with the yellow top and the green tractor)

I won’t tag anyone since I can’t remember who all has done this, but feel free to do this one, too, and let me know if you do so I can come and read your answers.

Wordless Wednesday

Posted on June 27, 2007 by Barbara Harper

See more Wordless Wednesday entires at the WW Hub or 5 Minutes for Mom.

(There is an explanation of this in the first comment. 🙂 )

Works-For-Me Wednesday: Verifying Founding Fathers’ Quotes

Posted on June 27, 2007 by Barbara Harper

With next Wednesday being Independence Day, many of us will likely be posting quotes from the Founding Fathers. Just after publishing several such quotes in our ladies’ ministry newsletter a few years ago, I discovered to my chagrin that many of them had no historical verification. There is a great article called Unconfirmed Quotations at the Wallbuilders site which discusses several of those quotes. Hopefully this will save some of you the embarrassment I suffered. 🙂

Incidentally, Wallbuilders, “an organization dedicated to presenting America’s forgotten history and heroes, with an emphasis on the moral, religious, and constitutional foundation on which America was built,” has a number of great articles here.

Click on the WFMW graphic above to visit Shannon’s site for a wealth of great tips.