Influencing Our Grandchildren for God

Posted on September 10, 2023 by Barbara Harper

I was reading of a grandmother who planned specific activities when her grandchildren came to visit. She’d plot a course and assemble supplies. Some of their endeavors were simple, some elaborate. Her grandchildren looked forward to whatever fun event would be happening at Grandma’s house that day.

The last time my only grandson, Timothy, stayed with us without his parents, we sat on the couch while he showed me his toy and told me about it. We talked about a number of other things. He broke into spontaneous, imaginative play while we watched and commented. And I wondered, “Should I have planned something special to do together?”

Sometimes we might do a planned activity, but usually we’re pretty laid back. I’m sure the activity-planning grandparent probably has low-key times with her grandchildren as well.

There are no right or wrong styles of grandparenting . . . well, setting aside negative examples of abuse or neglect. But how we interact will depend a lot of personalities, circumstances, energy levels, etc.

However, most Christian grandparents want, above all else, to be a godly example to their grandchildren and to influence them for the Lord.

Sometimes it’s difficult to know how to do that. We’re not with our grandchildren all the time. Teaching them is primarily their parent’s responsibility. How can we have the best influence?

I’ve only been a grandparent to one child less than a decade, so I am not an expert. But observations of other grandparents plus my own reading and thoughts have resulted in these ideas.

Engage with them. Sometimes we bring our grandchildren into what we do: gardening, baking, fishing, riding bikes, and so on. Sometimes we enter into what they like to do, whether playing games, coloring, building with Legos, or going to a playground or children’s museum. One of my favorite memories with Timothy involved boxes of Little People toys saved from our kids’ childhoods, especially the Grandma and Baby figures. Once a stray dinosaur had gotten tucked away with them. We had the dinosaur chasing Little People all over the place.

However we go about it, we need to spend time with them, get to know them, and let them get to know us. We would do this anyway just because we love them. But we also aren’t going to be able to speak into their lives without that underlying relationship. If our only interaction with them is didactic, they’re probably going to avoid us.

Pray for them regularly. Pray for wisdom in being an influence to them.

Point out God’s hand in creation and circumstances. One friend is a master at this, regularly pointing out God’s creativity in the sky, insects, even onions.

Share how God has worked in and through His people. Deuteronomy 4:9 says, “Only take care, and keep your soul diligently, lest you forget the things that your eyes have seen, and lest they depart from your heart all the days of your life. Make them known to your children and your children’s children.”

Share personal stories. This is something I wish I had done more with our children. School, Sunday School, and Awanas focused on doctrine, so at home we dealt more with character development. But doctrine and character are integrated, and both are personal, not just academic.

These things are harder to do when we don’t live near our grandchildren. I have fond memories of writing letters to and receiving letters from my grandmother. We have multitudes of ways to keep in touch these days.

If parenting instruction is more “caught” than “taught,” I think grandparenting influence is even more so. Sharing how God has worked in our own lives, leading us, and providing for us, helps them learn that God is personally interested in us, a friend that sticks closer than a brother (Proverbs 18:24). In Deuteronomy 6, God wants “you and your son and your son’s son” to fear Him and keep His commandments. He wants families to “talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise” (verses 2-7).

Most of us aspire to be like Timothy’s grandmother, Lois. “I am reminded of your sincere faith, a faith that dwelt first in your grandmother Lois and your mother Eunice and now, I am sure, dwells in you as well” (1 Timothy 4:5).

We want to share “things that we have heard and known, that our fathers have told us. We will not hide them from their children, but tell to the coming generation the glorious deeds of the Lord, and his might, and the wonders that he has done” (Psalm 78:3-4).

Some of us don’t have grandchildren (or even children). Or we might have only one or two. But we can minister to other children and young people in our sphere of influence by showing an interest, getting to know them, and speaking a word for God as He leads.

How about you? What ways have you found to influence your grandchildren or any of the next generation for the Lord?

Tell to the coming generation the glorious deeds of the LORD, and his might, and the wonders that he has do. Psalm 78:4

(I often link up with some of these bloggers.)

When Everything Goes Wrong

Posted on September 3, 2023 by Barbara Harper

It must have seemed to the disciples like everything was going wrong.

In less than twenty-four hours, everything they had worked for the past three years seemed to unravel:

A “great crowd with swords and clubs” came to find Jesus in the garden of Gethsemane (Matthew 26:47).
Judas, one of the twelve disciples, betrayed Jesus.
Peter, thinking to defend Jesus, wielded his sword and cut off a man’s ear. But Jesus told him to put his sword away.
Jesus was wrongly arrested.
People lied about Jesus at His trial.
Jesus was falsely accused of blasphemy.
The Jews spit at, slapped, beat, and mocked Jesus.
Peter, who promised to stay with Jesus always, denied knowing Him.
Judas killed himself.
Jesus was taken to Pilate, who offered to make Jesus the prisoner he annually released for the crowd. But the crowd chose Barabbas instead.
Pilate had Jesus scourged and delivered Him to be crucified.
The Roman soldiers mocked, spit on, and beat Jesus.
Jesus was crucified between two thieves.
Jesus was mocked by the crowd.
Jesus died.
Earthquakes split rocks and opened tombs.

I can only imagine the disciples’ dismay and confusion for the three days between the crucifixion and resurrection. Jesus told them He was going to be put to death and rise again, but somehow they didn’t get it. At least, however they thought it was all going to work, they were clearly surprised and unprepared.

Their leader, their Messiah, had been cruelly treated and killed. How did it all happen, and so quickly? What was going to happen to them now? What should they do?

As they were soon to discover, God’s perfect will was being worked out. God didn’t just work in spite of all that had occurred, but through it all.

God’s fingerprints were all over this day. Does that mean He made people sin? No, but He knew what they would do.

At least 27 Old Testament prophecies were fulfilled by Christ in that one day, not to mention so many that were fulfilled over His lifetime. .

The Pharisees had not wanted to arrest Christ during the Passover “lest there be an uproar among the people (Matthew 26:3-4). But that’s exactly when it happened, so that Jesus, the Lamb of God, could fulfill what the Passover lamb represented.

When Pilate said, “Do you not know that I have authority to release you and authority to crucify you?” Jesus answered him, “You would have no authority over me at all unless it had been given you from above” (John 19:10).

Jesus “yielded up His spirit” (Matthew 27:50). He died when He had fulfilled everything and when He was ready. He died on His terms, not Pilates’ or the Pharisees’ or the soldiers’.

On this worst of days, when everything seemed to be going wrong, God was working to accomplish the means of our salvation. Though it must have seemed to the disciples that everything was spinning out of control, God’s perfect will was being accomplished.

Others in Scripture had times when everything seemed to be going wrong.

Job lost his possessions, his livelihood, his ten children, and then his health.
Abraham and Sarah were promised a son, but nothing happened for decades.
Joseph was the favored son, but was sold by his brothers into slavery, falsely accused, and thrown into prison. Those whom he asked to say a good word for him forgot.
David was anointed king, but spent years running for his life and hiding in caves before he was crowned.
The Jews were on the verge of being exterminated by a wicked enemy in the book of Esther. Esther was unsure whether her husband, a pagan king, would listen to her plea to save her people. Though God is not named in the book, His hand is obvious throughout.

We see their situations resolved by God’s provision and leading in just a few pages. But we need to remember they lived with questions and bewilderment for a long time, even for many years in some cases.

Olympic runner and missionary Eric Liddell said, “Circumstances may appear to wreck our lives and God’s plans, but God is not helpless among the ruins. God’s love is still working. He comes in and takes the calamity and uses it victoriously, working out His wonderful plan of love.”

When things seem to be falling apart, when God’s answer doesn’t seem to be coming, when we’re confused, when we have no idea how the current circumstances will ever work out, we can go to God. He doesn’t always let us know His plans or reasons. But He promises He loves us and He is in control. He has a purpose for everything He allows. Many verses reassure us of these things. Here are just a few:

“Remember the former things of old; for I am God, and there is no other; I am God, and there is none like me, declaring the end from the beginning and from ancient times things not yet done,
saying, ‘My counsel shall stand, and I will accomplish all my purpose” (Isaiah 46:9-10).
“The LORD has established his throne in the heavens, and his kingdom rules over all” (Psalm 103:19).
“Then Job answered the Lord and said: ‘I know that you can do all things, and that no purpose of yours can be thwarted'” (Job 42:1-2).
“Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the LORD that will stand” (Proverbs 19:21).
“Our God is in the heavens; he does all that he pleases” (Psalm 115:3).
“The Most High rules the kingdom of men” (Daniel 4:25b).
“And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose” (Romans 8:28).

Throughout the Bible, we see people laying their hearts, confusion, and questions out before the Lord, often in anguish. After reminding themselves of the truth they knew about God’s character, wisdom, love and power, they came to a place of trust, submission, hope, and joy. They received His grace and help to carry on and wait for God’s answer.

We can, too.

(I often link up with some of these bloggers.)

Laudable Linkage

Posted on September 2, 2023 by Barbara Harper

Here are some of the good reads found this week:

Jesus Said More About Hell Than Anyone in the Bible, HT to Challies. “What a wonderful thing it is that Jesus warns us. He does not leave us ignorant of the wrath to come. He not only warns. He rescues. This is the best effect of fear: it wakens us to our need for help and points us to the all-sufficient Redeemer, Jesus. Let it have this effect on you.”

Truth to Cling to When Nothing Makes Sense, HT to Challies. “Though there have been many precious years of walking with my Savior, the past several years has shaken my confidence as the road has continued to be dark, long, and painful. Though God has been faithful in so many ways (far more than we can probably see) I have been increasingly perplexed and unsettled by his ways.”

What’s the Temperature of Your Love Relationship with the Lord? “Whether you’re teaching, planning events, cleaning the church, or filling your days with service to your family, your love for what you do and for the people you are serving is an overflow of your love for God. In protecting and preserving that vertical relationship, there’s no substitute for time spent in his presence, soaking in the truth of his Word.”

Don’t Think About Elephants! HT to Challies. “There is more to the answer than saying, ‘don’t be anxious’. That doesn’t work; we then become anxious about whether we are doing a good job of not being anxious! Let me prove it to you. I want you to not think about elephants. Whatever you do, I don’t want the thought of an elephant to enter your mind. Don’t think about their size or their ears or their trunks. How are you going? What are you thinking about right now? I think I can guess!”

7 Meaningful Ways and Reasons to Be Kind to Yourself. We can beat ourselves up unmercifully when we make mistakes, but that’s destructive. Jeanne shares better ways to respond.

On Short-Term Missions, Part 4: Semper Gumby. “When you’re ministering cross-culturally, you’re dealing with people who are different from you all day long. They think differently, they do things differently; they’re offended by different things, they laugh at different things. In that kind of environment, it’s possible for you to be highly offensive, even with the best of intentions. So you need to adjust your thinking.” This is good advice even in business or other situations where we interact with people from another culture.

Greet with a Holy Kiss? Applying an Uncomfortable Command, HT to Challies. Some good ways to think about and apply the passages referring to a “holy kiss.”

The Blessings of Boredom. “Anytime we feel the slightest hint of boredom, we look for the closest novelty to alleviate that feeling. That usually means grabbing our phones, checking social media, playing a game, reading the news, or otherwise finding something to occupy our minds. The result, however, is that we find ourselves dashing from room to hallway, room to hallway, never fully pacifying that feeling of boredom and never very much enjoying the distraction either. The sad thing is that this is a form of self-sabotage.”

God does not waste suffering, nor does He discipline out of caprice.
If He plough, it is because He purposes a crop. — J. Oswald Sanders

Laudable Linkage

Posted on August 26, 2023 by Barbara Harper

Here are some good reads discovered this week:

On Short-Term Missions, Part 3: More Than Good Intentions. “One of the first things that students on my teams would learn is that the African Christians with whom they were working 1) were their spiritual superiors in nearly every way, and 2) were absolutely necessary to their ministry success. We weren’t there to ‘help the poor Africans’; we were there to labor alongside them and learn a lot in the process.”

Glorifying God and Glorifying Mountains. “A friend recently asked, ‘What does it mean to glorify God?’ It is a phrase we know and a phrase we often repeat. But what does it actually mean? How do we go about it? And in what ways may we do the very opposite?”

Give Humble Counsel, HT to Challies. “As a childless, unmarried, single man with no money, I was brimming with counsel about raising children, marriage, and money. And I didn’t just have counsel, I had the conclusive word from God. I had Bible verses; therefore I had the answer. But the interesting thing about God’s word is that it can be twisted (2 Peter 3:16), taken out of context (Matt 4), and must be rightly divided (2 Tim 2:15). I was very good at reading and applying the Bible, but I lacked discernment, wisdom, and humility.”

When to Seek Justice or Bear Injustice, HT to Challies. “What do we do about injustice? Options range from setting up campaigns and waging unrelenting war against it right the way through to actively encouraging it ourselves. But what should be our response as believers? I think there is a time to pus back against injustice and there is a time to wear it. The big question is, how do we know when to do either?”

How the Bible Talks About Corporate Responsibility and Repentance, HT to Challies. “Christian obedience becomes impossible when, instead of the basics of putting off the works of the flesh and putting on the fruit of the Spirit (Gal. 5:16–24; Col. 3:5–14), we are called to account for every unpopular ism, every broken system, and every bad thing we see too much of in the culture.”

Let God Prove Himself, in this case, but trusting and obeying Him in regard to money.

You’re Only Human, HT to Challies. “God’s grace in that moment finally pierced my self-berating accusations and I was reminded: I’m human and in the process of sanctification as I seek to raise these sinful, imperfect, ‘in the process of sanctification’ little humans. God has given me circumstances as a mom that demand my attention, carry immense weight, and drain me physically, emotionally, and often spiritually. And he knows that.”

For the Mom Dropping Her Student Off at College, HT to Challies. “When you feel the temptation to hold on tighter, to micromanage, to over-protect, or to succumb to despair as your student moves into the dorm, remember Whose they are. They belong to the Lord. This is a new opportunity to practice trusting the One who loves both you and your son or daughter.”

A Hand on My Shoulder, HT to Challies. This is a sweet and touching story of one’s man’s influence coming full circle in another’s life.

Excerpt from "Thy Will Be Done" hymn by Charlotte Elliott

Birthday Meditations on Aging

Posted on August 20, 2023 by Barbara Harper

Since my birthday is this week, and I had a “milestone” birthday last year, I’ve been thinking about aging.

My husband and I often remark that we don’t feel “old” (“old,” to me, has always been about twenty years beyond where I am now). We might tire a little more easily and have a plethora of aches and pains. But looking closely in the mirror often yields unpleasant surprises. When did that happen?

Seeing my mother-in-law through her last ten years of life brought up a long list of concerns about what we’ll face as we age. I once heard a preacher say that one reason our bodies start to fail us as we get older is so that we’ll be more willing to let loose of them. Each year reminds us that we’re in a temporary habitation.

But probably what most concerns me about aging is not being taken seriously any more, being thought of as out of touch or irrelevant.

On the other hand, there are perks to getting older. I’m more settled in my own skin. I’ve wrestled through questions and problems. Hopefully I’ve gained some wisdom through the years.

I wish Elisabeth Elliot had written a book on aging. She was my mentor-from-afar since my college days and helped me prepare for womanhood, marriage, motherhood, and Christian life and service. I did just discover that she had a series about aging on her radio program. I might spend my birthday week listening to those.

But I found in my files of her old e-mail devotionals an excerpt from her book On Asking God Why titled “Happy Birthday—You’re Heading Home.” She writes what she would say to an old friend on her birthday. The last few paragraphs encourage me:

You’ve heard those bad news/good news jokes. Well, this isn’t cheap birthday card humor. The bad news is that another year has gone by and we haven’t done all we meant to do and it’s not going to come back to give us another chance. The good news is the Gospel. We can be reconciled to God–sins forgiven, fears taken care of. That old cross, the emblem of suffering and shame, stands between us and our sins and fears, our past and future, and on its outstretched arms we see Love. The Love that would die for us is the Love that lives for us–Jesus Christ, Lord, Master, Savior of the World, wanting to give you (for your birthday if you’ll take it) something that will really quench your thirst, rivers among the sand dunes and wells in the valley; wanting to hold your hand, help you, give you–not only a happy birthday, but everlasting joy.

I’m not the least bit bashful about telling my age. I’m glad for every birthday that comes, because it is the Lord, my faithful Guide, who “summoned the generations from the beginning.” I look in the mirror and see the increasingly (and creasingly) visible proofs of the number of years, but I’m reconciled. Christ reconciles me to God and to God’s wonderful plan. My life is his life. My years are his years. To me life is Christ, and death is nothing but gain. When I remember that, I really can’t think of a thing I ought to be afraid of. I can’t be sorry I’m a year older and nearer to absolute bliss.

I pray for you on your birthday, that your path, as is promised to the just man, will shine not less and less but more and more; that you will still bring forth fruit in old age; that the Lord will give you a thankful heart like the psalmist’s who sang,

O God, thou hast taught me from boyhood,
all my life I have proclaimed thy marvellous works:
and now that I am old and my hairs are gray,
forsake me not, O God….
Songs of joy shall be on my lips;
I will sing thee psalms, because thou has redeemed me.
All day long my tongue shall tell of thy righteousness.

(Psalms 71:17, 18, 23, 24 NEB)

So–happy birthday! If you have friends and parties and presents, be thankful for such bonuses. If you have no friends with you today, no party, not a package to open, you still have a long list of things to thank God for, things that matter much more. A birthday filled with thanksgiving and hope is the happiest kind of birthday. Have one of those! Deck yourself with joy!

I agree with Elisabeth and Paul that “to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain” (Philippians 1:21) and that heaven will be bliss. But I am encouraged that many through Scripture pleaded for more years of this life in which to serve and praise the Lord.

Elisabeth quoted the first part of Psalm 71:18. The whole verse, along with 17, stood out to me as I read it recently:

So even to old age and gray hairs,
O God, do not forsake me,
until I proclaim your might to another generation,
your power to all those to come.

That’s what I want to do with as many days as God gives me.

(I often link up with some of these bloggers.)

When Do You Need to Look to Jesus?

Posted on August 13, 2023 by Barbara Harper

I don’t remember what I came to talk about with my elderly pastor’s wife that day four decades ago. Probably some besetting sin, some struggle of faith, some kind of burden. But I remember her shining, earnest face as she repeated, “Look away to Jesus.”

When do you need to look to Jesus?

Do you know where you’re going when you die? Do you have inner peace? Are you burdened with the weight of the world’s problems, and with your own as well? Do you have regrets, guilt, shame? Look to Jesus.

Look to Me, and be saved, All you ends of the earth! For I am God, and there is no other (Isaiah 45:22, NKJV).

Jesus said to him, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me” (John 14:6).

Do you need to change? Are you discouraged because of a lack of transformation and growth? Look to Jesus.

And we all, with unveiled face, beholding the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from one degree of glory to another. For this comes from the Lord who is the Spirit (2 Corinthians 3:18).

Do you need focus as you run the race of life? Do you stumble and fall spiritually? Look to Jesus.

Let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God (Hebrews 12:1b-2).

Do you long for something more than this life has to offer? Do you need hope to persevere? Look to Jesus.

For the grace of God that brings salvation has appeared to all men, teaching us that, denying ungodliness and worldly lusts, we should live soberly, righteously, and godly in the present age, looking for the blessed hope and glorious appearing of our great God and Savior Jesus Christ, who gave Himself for us, that He might redeem us from every lawless deed and purify for Himself His own special people, zealous for good works (Titus 2:11-14, NKJV).

Do you need grace and help and wisdom for every day life? Look to Jesus.

Seek the LORD and His strength; Seek His face continually (Psalm 105:4, NASB).

You have said, “Seek my face.” My heart says to you, “Your face, Lord, do I seek” (Psalm 27:8).

Looking to Jesus day after day,
Trusting His love each step of the way,
Knowing that He so willingly shares
All of my sorrows, troubles and cares.

Refrain:
Looking to Jesus—looking to Him,
Whether the path be sunny or dim;
Holding His hand by night and by day,
Trusting His love each step of the way.

Looking to Jesus when I am sad,
Looking to Jesus when I am glad,
Having no fear of tempest or foe,
Singing His praises, onward I go.

Looking to Jesus when I’m opprest,
Looking to Him for comfort and rest,
Shunning the world, its clamor and strife,
Looking to Him who crowneth my life.

Looking to Jesus me to defend,
Shield and encourage unto the end;
Knowing that He has buried my past,
Looking to Him for glory at last.

James Rowe, Public Domain

(I often link up with some of these bloggers.)

Laudable Linkage

Posted on August 5, 2023 by Barbara Harper

There is so much good reading online. Here are a few that stood out to me. It’s probably a good time for my occasional reminder that linking to any source does not imply 100% endorsement of everything on that site.

Why’d the Pigs Have to Die? HT to Challies. I’ve often wondered about this, from when Jesus cast a legion of demons out of one man, and the demons went into a herd of pigs and destroyed them. I appreciate the answer.

The Secret Meaning of YHWH, HT to Knowable Word. “I think God is not pleased by the herculean efforts some people go to look so hard for hidden meanings—whether linguistic or allegorical or what have you—that they miss the simple point of what he said.”

What Does It Look Like to Serve as Others as Jesus Served? “What does it look like to be a servant to my family, to say ‘My life for yours’? As a person of faith, I look to Jesus as my example of a servant’s heart.”

One of the Weirdest Articles I’ve Ever Written. Mike Leake uses and absurd example to illustrate the point that “Just because a word means something somewhere doesn’t mean it carries that same meaning elsewhere.” We can end up with this kind of extreme interpretation in Bible word studies when we “find all the uses of that word and then you shove each of those passages and all of their meaning into the Scripture you’re studying.”

Ambassadors for Marriage, HT to Challies. “It’s one thing for me, a 50-something, Christian mother of four, grandmother of two, to say, ‘Yes, get married! Don’t wait for the ‘perfect’ person or perfect timing! Don’t wait to get the whole rest of your life in order first! Marriage is great—it’s totally worth it!’ But it’s another thing entirely coming from someone who is under the age of 30.”

What It Feels Like, HT to Challies. A pastor’s experience with depression.

Shepherding Children Through Exposure to Pornography, HT to Challies. It’s sad that such an article is necessary, but these days, it’s too easy to come across pornography unexpectedly and then be drawn in.

God is Near: Certain Comforts for Moms, HT to Challies. “In my role as the Director of Children’s Ministries at my church, I’m privy to the thoughts of many mothers. As moms think about ‘back to school,’ one emotion keeps bubbling to the surface over and over. I hear it in their voices, in the questions they ask, and the conversations they have. It’s not a pretty emotion. It’s one that can sometimes paralyze us. Fear.”

Your Rights as a Christian in a Public School in 2023, HT to Challies.

The most recent newsletter from the Elisabeth Elliot Foundation shared that the Museum of the Bible in Washington D.C is hosting an exhibit called Through Gates of Splendor: The Elisabeth Elliot Story through the end of 2023. I’d love to see it, but I doubt I’ll get to D.C. before the end of this year. Thankfully, this article says they’re working on a traveling exhibit. The newsletter shared this video of opening day:

Laudable Linkage

Posted on July 29, 2023 by Barbara Harper

I have a question for those of you who receive my blog posts via email. Have you had any problems receiving them lately? Of course, if you have, you might not be seeing this. 🙂 I ask because a long-time reader just told me this week she hasn’t received my blog posts via email for some time now. I am trying to discern whether this is a widespread problem. I see them both via email and Feedly so I can make sure they’re coming through, and I have not had any problem with either venue. WordPress handles the sending, so I can let them know about it. But it helps to have as much information as I can when I report a problem to them. How long has it been since the emails stopped coming? If you try to subscribe, do you get any error messages? If so, what do they say? Thanks so much for your help.

Now on to this week’s links. I hope you see something that sparks your interest.

Come, HT to Challies. “He came to the dead; the bleeding; the hopeless. To the ones on the side of life’s roads, passed over. To the grieving and the outcast. To the ones desperate to be seen; those hungry to belong.”

Do Not Grieve the Holy Spirit. “What does it mean to grieve the Holy Spirit? My initial reaction to the word grieve in reference to the Holy Spirit was a negative one: Surely the Spirit of God does not actually grieve, does he? Perhaps this is a poor translation. Isn’t sorrow a too-human reaction to ascribe to the holy God? Doesn’t it diminish the Spirit to suggest that my sin can make him feel genuine sorrow?”

How Were the Books of the Bible “Chosen,” HT to Challies. “The earliest Christians did not view themselves as choosing books, nor did they view themselves as having the right/power to do such a thing. Instead, they viewed themselves as receiving the books that had been handed down to them by the apostles.”

A Light to My Path, HT to Challies. “When the sun streams into my kitchen window, it cheers my soul. Everything literally seems brighter. Its brilliance however, illuminates more than just the room. Particles of dust flicker through its rays, grandchildren’s sticky handprints on the window pane bother me, and tiny bits of red dirt speckle the floor. When the light shines into my room, I see things otherwise hidden.”

Are You Satisfied with Your Prayer Life or Is Prayer Simply a Means to an End? “In the Pie Chart that is your life, how big is the slice devoted to prayer? “I don’t ask to induce guilt or to point the finger of condemnation. It’s actually a question I’m asking myself, and it’s been prompted by a statistic I just bumped into once again.”

When You Feel Powerless to Influence Your Children. “More important, they revealed the lie I had believed—that my children were safe as long as I was nearby. And that I had the ultimate power to protect them from harm, bad influences, and spiritual apostasy. Without intending to, I had usurped God’s role, at least in my mind, as their guardian and protector.”

Jesus can understand your prayer despite feebleness or poor language.

The Most Important Way to Change

Posted on July 23, 2023 by Barbara Harper

If we become concerned about a character trait we see in ourselves that we’d like to change, we might search Google for blog posts. “Ten Ways to Tame Your Temper” or “Six Ways to Curb a Sharp Tongue.” *

We might read a book on the subject, seek counsel, or even do a topical Bible study.

We might set standards and rules for ourselves.

There’s nothing wrong with any of those approaches. I’ve used them all and found help in each one.

But we often forget the primary means God gave us to change.

“And we all, with unveiled face, beholding the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from one degree of glory to another. For this comes from the Lord who is the Spirit” (2 Corinthians 3:18).

We’re changed bit by bit by beholding His glory.

Well, how does that work?

When Moses asked to see God’s glory, God said, “I will make all my goodness pass before you.” Then “the Lord passed before him and proclaimed, ‘The Lord, the Lord, a God merciful and gracious, slow to anger, and abounding in steadfast love and faithfulness” (Exodus 33:18-23; 34:5-7).

GotQuestions defines the glory of God as “the beauty of His spirit . . . that emanates from His character, from all that He is.”

John Piper says, “The glory of God is the manifest beauty of his holiness. It is the going-public of his holiness. It is the way he puts his holiness on display for people to apprehend. So, the glory of God is the holiness of God made manifest.”

When we read and study our Bibles or listen to sermons, we don’t just look for principles, helpful as those are. We look for God. What does this passage say about Him? What is it demonstrating to me about Him? We behold Him, see Him, worship Him in all His goodness.

When I’m battling pride, nothing helps me more than thinking of Jesus, “who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross” (Philippians 2:6-8).

When I’m craving things I shouldn’t have, I think of Jesus being tempted with bread after 40 days of fasting in the wilderness. He had a legitimate need to eat, but He resisted Satan’s temptations to partake on his terms.

When I have trouble loving others as I should, I think how Jesus loved me when I was unlovable and undeserving.

When I’d rather hold a grudge than forgive, I think how He has forgiven me so much more than anything I’m asked to forgive others.

When I see Him in the gospels meeting people’s needs, busy but not stressed, I’m helped to avoid becoming frenzied with all I need to do.

Interruptions are my biggest pet peeves. Realizing that the incident with the woman with the issue of blood was an interruption to Jesus’ journey to heal Jairus’ daughter added a dimension to these situations I had not realized before. Jesus was not ruffled at the delay. He took it in stride.

When I behold Him, I see my limitations. I’m painfully aware I am not Him. I’m humbled to realize just how much I need Him.

When I behold Him, anxiety flees away. He can take care of any problem that comes up.

Hannah Anderson wrote in Humble Roots: How Humility Grounds and Nourishes Your Soul about the Colossians who “believed they could reach purity by adhering to certain standards” and were “holding fast to their regulations” instead of Christ.

Ultimately the Colossians’ pride was revealed by what they were looking at, by what had captured their attention. Instead of being concerned with eternal realities, they were concerned with regulating temporary realities. Instead of being consumed with Christ’s glory, they were consumed with their own. But it is only by beholding Christ that we are changed. It is only by beholding Christ who Himself took “on the form of a servant” that we learn to serve each other (p. 94).

Standards and regulations have their place. But real heart change occurs as we behold God’s glory.

May our heart’s cry be like David’s:

O God, you are my God; earnestly I seek you; my soul thirsts for you; my flesh faints for you, as in a dry and weary land where there is no water. So I have looked upon you in the sanctuary, beholding your power and glory. Because your steadfast love is better than life, my lips will praise you (Psalm 63:1-3).

One thing have I asked of the Lord, that will I seek after: that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord and to inquire in his temple (Psalm 27:4).

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*Made up titles.

(I often link up with some of these bloggers.)

How to Return to Your First Love

Posted on July 16, 2023 by Barbara Harper

Imagine a good friend tells you she’s thinking of leaving her husband. The magic is gone. They don’t love each other any more. They’re just going through the motions.

After listening to your friend, if she’s open, you might suggest several things. As I thought of these, I realized many of them paralleled how we could return to our first love spiritually.

In Revelation 2:1-7, God instructs John to write a letter to the church at Ephesus. They are commended for several things: They’ve worked hard and endured patiently for His name’s sake. They cared for truth and have tested and rooted out false apostles. Those are all good traits. Yet, Jesus said, “I have this against you, that you have abandoned the love you had at first.” It’s possible to work hard for the Lord and stand for truth, yet not do so out of love for Him.

Jesus commands them to “Remember therefore from where you have fallen; repent, and do the works you did at first.” Otherwise, He warns, He’ll have to remove them.

So how do we return to our first love? We can’t just flip a switch and turn on the right feelings.

Pray. The first step is to ask for help. A marriage on the brink of divorce has a lot of deep issues. Usually by the time a couple gets to that point, they’ve already made up their minds, and it’s extremely hard to turn things around. They’re going to need God’s help.

Spiritually, we start at the same place. We may be confused. “I thought I was doing everything right.” We need wisdom and insight to see how we’ve drifted into serving without love. It’s true, love is not just a feeling. But according to this passage and 1 Corinthians 13, love is not just service, either.

Romans 5:5 tells us “God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.” And love is a fruit of the Holy Spirit (Galatians 5: 22-23).

Paul prays for love in various churches:

That they might be “rooted and grounded in love” and “may have strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge” (Ephesians 3:18-19).
That their “love may abound more and more, with knowledge and all discernment” (Philippians 1:9).
That “the Lord make you increase and abound in love for one another and for all” (1 Thessalonians 3:12).

We can pray these things for ourselves in our relationships with others and the Lord.

Remember His attributes. You could ask your friend to remember what attracted her to her husband in the first place. Sure, his looks and physique changed over the years (so did hers). But she probably married him because she saw something in his character that she liked.

A few years ago, I read Jen Wilkin’s book on God’s attributes: None Like Him:10 Ways God is Different From Us (and Why That’s a Good Thing) and In His Image: 10 Ways God Calls Us to Reflect His Character (linked to my reviews). I expected that studying God’s attributes would inspire worship, but I was surprised to find that the study also increased my love for God. I shouldn’t have been surprised: the more we meditate on how wonderful He is, of course we’re going to love Him even more.

Remember your past history. When a couple has been together for a while, they accumulate a lot of shared experiences: fun times, the trials they worked through, the inside jokes. They have a history they share with no one else. Remembering those times might draw them closer together.

The apostle John wrote, “We love Him because He first loved us” (1 John 4:19, NKJV). Calling to mind the ways God has shown love to me inspires love for Him.

Looking back over my history with God warms my heart. He set off a series of events to bring me to faith in Himself. He loved me and drew me before I knew Him.

He has blessed me in countless ways ever since. Some years ago, I was inspired to create a list of “Ebenezers.” Samuel once set up for Israel a stone he called an Ebenezer, meaning “a stone of help,” to commemorate what God had done for them. So one year I wrote an extensive list of those special moments in my life when God intervened in a way that could only have come from Him. Remembering answered prayer and times God spoke to my heart from His Word, and so many other evidences of His care in my life, fuels my love for Him.

Psalm 63 gives a vivid picture of such remembrances:

My soul will be satisfied as with fat and rich food,
and my mouth will praise you with joyful lips,
when I remember you upon my bed,
and meditate on you in the watches of the night;
for you have been my help,
and in the shadow of your wings I will sing for joy (verses 5-7).

Spend focused time together. Life can settle into routines, and couples end up just passing each other while doing errands, talking only about the mundane affairs of life. We need time to set aside everything and just focus on each other, share our hearts, and listen to each other. That may be a date night or just sitting at the table with coffee.

The same happens with God. As I said last week, routines help establish time with the Lord. But after a while, they can feel just routine, like we’re just working through a list and not connecting. Remembering that I am meeting with my Lord alone helps me refocus.

Forgive. A couple on the brink of divorce has accumulated a lot of hurts and slights. It’s easy to only see the negative. It may take time and counseling to work through all of that, but at some point, they’ll need to learn to forgive each other.

Elisabeth Elliot said once that a wife may like 80% of what her husband says and does, yet focus and harp on the 20% she doesn’t like. Once we get fixated on the negative, it fills our vision til that’s all we can see.

This one is different in our relationship with God. Some people speak of “forgiving God” when He does things we don’t like, but I cringe at such talk. We don’t need to forgive Him. He’s the Holy, pure, all-wise, all-powerful, righteous God of the universe! He does nothing wrong. It’s a little audacious to think of us forgiving Him.

Yet, He does things that confuse us. He may not have answered a heartfelt prayer. He may have allowed a tragedy. We might be hurt, resentful, or even angry. But we’re in trouble if we hold these things against Him. Jesus said, ” Blessed is the one who is not offended by me” (Matthew 11:6).

Thankfully, we have the psalms and prophets as examples of people pouring out their hearts before God, sometimes in confusion and anguish and anger. They remind themselves of what they know to be true about God—that He loves them, that He will take care of them and meet their needs— and they find peace. So we need to remind ourselves of who God is and His right to rule in our lives according to His purposes. And we remind ourselves that He doesn’t bring suffering in our lives capriciously. “For the Lord will not cast off forever, but, though he cause grief, he will have compassion according to the abundance of his steadfast love; for he does not afflict from his heart or grieve the children of men” (Lamentations 3:31-33).

Put the other first. When human relationships are on the verge of breaking up, selfishness has likely crept in, probably on both sides. One of my former professors (Dr. Walter Fremont) used to say love is the self-sacrificing desire to meet the need of the cherished object. It’s easy to focus on what we want others to do for us—or what they’re failing to do for us—and overlook our own failings.

God doesn’t “need” anything from us. But there are things He asks of us. We ask Him to bless our plans without considering whether they are His plans. Paul reminds us, “If then you have been raised with Christ, seek the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth” (Colossians 3:1-2).

I don’t mean to be simplistic about either romantic love or spiritual love. There may be a lot of layers to peel back and issues to work through. People may need help and counsel in either case. But these steps can get us started in the right direction.

What helps you rekindle your love for God?